I'm feeling a bit guilty about something...although its prob normal

...I realized that I have been so busy and consumed with DS and other things going on that I haven't really thought all too much about this pregnancy...don't get me wrong....I think about my on the way and smile and can't wait to meet him. I just remember when I was pregnant with Johnny, it consumed a lot of my thoughts-I daydreamed about him all the time, and this time around it's almost like I forget I'm pregnant.

And there is this other TINY part of me that thinks "can i love this baby as much as johnny?". I KNOW i will, I've been told it a thousand times and I've told others that "of course they will!!". But I just love my son so much that its very hard to imagine a second right now....

I know my feelings are prob very normal, just having a bit of guilt right now over it all!

Re: I'm feeling a bit guilty about something...although its prob normal

I think what you are feeling is totally normal!! I am not pregnant with #2 but we are TTC and I already had this conversation with DH---I asked him the same question. I think of course the answer is yes, you will love him as much, but its hard to imagine---just like I never dreamed how much I would love my son.

Re: I'm feeling a bit guilty about something...although its prob normal

You will absolutely LOVE your 2nd child as much as Johnny. BUT, I will say this and I hope it doesn't come off mean or selfish. For me, there will always be just a teeny- tiny something extra with my first born. I think because I experienced all my firsts as a parent with him and we MADE it out alive

Re: I'm feeling a bit guilty about something...although its prob normal

Totally normal! I never really thought about Alexa while I was PG with her. When I would throw up, or gag or when I was going in for my c-section, that is when I thought about her. But she is def not neglected now

Re: I'm feeling a bit guilty about something...although its prob normal

Get used to the guilt You will definately love this baby as much as your DS- you are actually more comfortable this time around so you enjoy it more- at least I have. But now I feel gulity that I don't spend as much time as I could with my older child. It's hard to find that balance.

Hang in there and enjoy your pregnancy!

Re: I'm feeling a bit guilty about something...although its prob normal

Posted by Sweets13

You will absolutely LOVE your 2nd child as much as Johnny. BUT, I will say this and I hope it doesn't come off mean or selfish. For me, there will always be just a teeny- tiny something extra with my first born. I think because I experienced all my firsts as a parent with him and we MADE it out alive

Re: I'm feeling a bit guilty about something...although its prob normal

I felt the same way when I was pregnant with DS, its totally normal, I was so busy with Julia to even think about my pregnancy, but once Todd Jr was born I was in love all over again!

Re: I'm feeling a bit guilty about something...although its prob normal

I'm pregnant with #3 and feel the same as you. I am running around after my 13 m/o twins every day, that there just isn't any time to sit and fantasize about this one. Plus half the thoughts used to be about how we were going to do it as first time parents, but now we are pros, so it's not on my mind. I do feel bad that I'm not constantly thinking of him/her, but I'm sure when the baby is here, everything will fall into place.

Re: I'm feeling a bit guilty about something...although its prob normal

Very normal. I went through the same thing. It's doesn't equate to love, it equates to you are now busy with a child.

Re: I'm feeling a bit guilty about something...although its prob normal

I'm not there yet, but I recently had the same conversation with a friend of mine who is preggo with #2. She feels no bond yet to the new baby, because all she can think about it how it's going to effet her DD. She knows once the baby is born things will fall into place, but she even has guilt about how her DD will feel and how she can make sure she always feels secure.

Re: I'm feeling a bit guilty about something...although its prob normal

i felt the same way and in all honesty (plz don't flame me) i still think about josh's needs (sensory & feeding) before everything else. don't get me wrong i LOVE LOVE LOVE my new ds and i'm literally attched to him 24/7 but josh's special needs still seem to be my priority (i just have my dh do everything with him now.)

Re: I'm feeling a bit guilty about something...although its prob normal

DH and I have been realizing this as well recently. We used to sit with our doppler every once in awhile and be amazed when Victoria would flip and kick while inside my tummy. But we have realized we are not giving this the same amount of attention her big sister received from us and we started feeling guilty over it.

DH is trying to make it a regular point to read a book to my belly but to be honest, Victoria swoops right in to kiss my belly and then demands Daddy's attention. With his work schedule he's not able to do anything without Victoria around. So for now while she doesn't understand about the baby - we are trying every night to do something. Some nights we can give 2 minutes and sometimes longer.

For now our efforts are only being made as a family so I need to start seeing it in that respect. I think I'm more excited to see my daughters together than anything else at this point