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I seriously HATE my ILs!

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Deeluvsvinny
DONE

Member since 10/08

4952 total posts

Name:
Whatever

I seriously HATE my ILs!

I know I vent about them a lot, but I seriously can not take the fact that FIL does not care about his ONLY son at all! He only cares about his wife and her kids. We are trying to make plans to see them for Christmas at some point.

We have plans on Christmas Eve (since we weren't even invited to spend it with them and HER family at their house) and Christmas Day- we are hosting (just my parents and bro & sis). We invited them, since they will not have her kids (they willbe with their father) but they said they "prefer to be home alone". Fine.

Saturday we are all going to Dh's grandma's house to see her and the aunts & uncle's. So Dh says to his dad, since Grandma lives near us in queens (Fil is out in Suffolk) why don't you come over to our house afterwards and we will exchange gifts/have coffee, etc.?

He said he has to check with his wife because he doesn't know what the plans are. So, dh said, how about Sunday, we can get together? He's going to his wife's brother's house that day.

So, basically he just doesn't care about seeing his son and 6 month preggo daughter in law for Christmas. He is so wrapped up in his nasty wife's life and family. I feel like our little girl isn't even going to know she has a grandfather. And I just feel bad for Dh, he gets so depressed, the more his dad shows how much he doesn't care about us. It's getting so hard to hold my tongue and not tell them how horrible they treat us.

Ugh, I can't deal with them anymore. We are always going out of our way to see them and rearrange our plans for them. And I know most of it is HER, but FIL let's her rule his life, so it's his fault too. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 12/22/09 11:02 AM
 
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munchkinfacemama
LOVE

Member since 11/07

15800 total posts

Name:
Michelle

Re: I seriously HATE my ILs!

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Vent away-they sound like disgusting people!

I am sorry you are dealing with this.

Posted 12/22/09 11:05 AM
 

MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor

Member since 12/07

16202 total posts

Name:
Deanna

Re: I seriously HATE my ILs!

that is so sad.. i feel so bad for you and DH.. its horrible that his father doesnt even want to see him Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

i hope your FIL comes around and realizes how he is acting Chat Icon

Posted 12/22/09 11:10 AM
 

MrsKS
Thank You St. Gerard.....

Member since 12/09

8306 total posts

Name:
Kerri

Re: I seriously HATE my ILs!

This is awfully sad!

Personally.... I think it's time to STOP going out of your way to see these people or make plans with them. It's time for them to step it up. I'd make this the last Christmas that I tried and tried to get togeher. From here on out I would just let these people go.

It might be hard... but sometimes it's better to not have people like this so in your life. They bring you down.

I HATE these stories. And SHAME SHAME SHAME on FIL!! Esp since this is his only child!!! It's a disgrace!!!

I'm soo sorry!!!

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 12/22/09 11:15 AM
 

MamaB17
Back for baby #3

Member since 5/09

4065 total posts

Name:
N

Re: I seriously HATE my ILs!

I am so sorry they are making you deal with this crap during the holidays. It is just awful. Lots of Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon for you & DH. Don't let them ruin your holiday. You guys shouldn't stress about it. DH tried to work something out, and they are just not cooperating. What else can you do? I feel so bad you guys are stuck in the middle of this. No matter how much you try w/ some ppl if they are not willing to meet you in the middle there is nothing else you can do. Enjoy your time with the rest of your family, and hopefully FIL will have a change of heart once Chat Icon arrives. Chat Icon

Posted 12/22/09 11:17 AM
 

bluekat16
My boys :-)

Member since 3/09

6659 total posts

Name:
Kathy

Re: I seriously HATE my ILs!

UGH!!! I'm so sorry you and DH have to deal with this Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

His father will one day realize what a mistake it has been not to be part of his son's life.

Honestly I would no longer make and effort and when we saw them that's when we'd see them.

Posted 12/22/09 11:22 AM
 

MamaLeen
:)

Member since 10/09

4594 total posts

Name:
E

Re: I seriously HATE my ILs!

I am sorry your dealing with this Chat Icon

I can relate, my DH's Mother is awful, she is so self absorbed and manipulative. She hasn't called me or seen me since finding out I am pregnant with FIRST child! She will not come have dinner at our house and definitely not with my parents who really want to see her. We didn't see her for thanksgiving and probably wont for x-mas. The worst thing is she guilts and twists my husbands arm to constantly bend over backwards for her. I could go on for hours with stories of how crazy she is !

It is beyond frustrating to see your DH being mis-treated, I hate it. I also feel like my son will not have a grandmother in his life from DH's side. I wish there was a solution but I don't think there is, some people are just not going to change and the only thing we can do is change the way we react or interact with them Chat Icon

I am sorry you have to deal with this, this should be a joyous time in your life but it is great that you have your own family now and you will be making new memories.

Posted 12/22/09 12:08 PM
 

RandiG
Love my Boys!

Member since 7/09

4440 total posts

Name:
Randi

Re: I seriously HATE my ILs!

I'm so sorry, just continue being supportive to your DH. I'm sure he needs it. Chat Icon

Posted 12/22/09 12:14 PM
 

Newly1
I love my baby boy!

Member since 6/08

2804 total posts

Name:
H

Re: I seriously HATE my ILs!

So sorry
Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 12/22/09 12:47 PM
 

mtnmama

Member since 5/06

4794 total posts

Name:

Re: I seriously HATE my ILs!

That is so sad, sorry! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 12/22/09 12:48 PM
 

twiceasnice
LIF Adult

Member since 2/08

1126 total posts

Name:

Re: I seriously HATE my ILs!

Yor FIL needs a rude awakening, your DH should lay it out like this:
"Christmas Eve you are spending with your wife's family, Christmas Day we invited you over but you have plans, I have invited you over Sat after Gma's and I have invited you over on Sunday. It hurts me that we can't even share a cup of coffee this Holiday season. If you cannot find time to spend with me then I will have to stop inviting you because I don't want to be rejected any longer. Now that my family is growing we won't have this kind of time to make things so convienent and I never thought spening time with my father would be so hard."

Posted 12/22/09 1:58 PM
 

mommy2B3
2 boys 2 girls!!!!

Member since 7/08

3324 total posts

Name:
M

Re: I seriously HATE my ILs!

Oh hun I feel for you Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon. My MIL is the SAME WAY, as is the rest of DH's family. Just wait till the baby is here, when they don't come to see the baby, it will also be your fault. I hate people like this, and I'm so sorry that you have to deal with it, as well as your DH. I swear our DHs should have a support group for all they go through!

And if you ever need to vent more, you can always FM Chat Icon

Posted 12/22/09 3:07 PM
 

kahlua716
3 Girls for Me!

Member since 8/07

12475 total posts

Name:
Keri

Re: I seriously HATE my ILs!

I'm so sorry he's like this Chat Icon

Posted 12/22/09 4:35 PM
 

mnmsoinlove
Mommy to 2 sweet girls!

Member since 3/09

8585 total posts

Name:
Melissa

Re: I seriously HATE my ILs!

That really is awful and just sad.

Posted 12/22/09 4:38 PM
 
 

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