How much does weight count?

I have gained so much of it over the course of this process. I'll admit it: I'm an emotional eater. This road of loss after failure after loss has beat me down so many times, that I am 50 lbs. heavier than I was when I got married. It's embarrassing. And it's like I want this so bad, but the tendency to comfort myself with food and wine only makes it harder.

I have seen 4 doctors. They each had a different level of emphasis on the weight, Dr. Brenner being the one that made me feel the most gluttonous and self-destructive. Dr. Davis never mentioned it, but when I asked, he suggested trying for conservative loss (10% of body weight) and still didn't seem that concerned. Dr. Kwak-Kim (immunologist) on the other hand was really concerned about "weight reduction" because extra weight is "inflammatory." I read that "Making Babies" book and he went to town on extra weight, connecting it to failure and m/c both.

Since my most recent failure, I have lost interest in food. It's so strange. I wish I could bottle this and save it for later. Since my retrieval on August 9th, I have lost 20 lbs. Some of that is obviously weight from the drugs, but at least half of it is real. I am on a mission to get back to my normal weight, which will take me until January at least. But I am 33 with DOR and 3 failures under my belt, so time is a factor. In the past I have never been very good at doing both at the same time despite valiant efforts at dieting while TTC, and I have a feeling that Dr. Davis is going to want me to try IVF again sooner than later. I'm torn in anticipation of that conversation.

I'm curious how many of you lost weight and saw a difference in response or results, and I'm interested in hearing how concerned your doctors were with extra weight.

Re: How much does weight count?

I think if you are overweight, it can decrease your chances, but with that said it is not a hard fast rule. My mom was overweight and had 5 children easily. I am 5'7" and 130-132 lbs and can not get pregnant (we are MF). I have two friends though who are dealing with unexplained IF and both are not overweight and have been trying for 1.5+ years. I think there is just so much doctors still do not know about IF.

Re: How much does weight count?

first let me say u have been through so much already,and congrats on being down 20 already

i was heavier before.from the day we started ttc to the day we saw a RE.

i have seen many docs and to be honest it never came up once...i read some girls stories on here and they r advised to lose weight etc

was i not bc they knew we had issues regardless and even if weight loss made me suddenly ovulate they knew we still were gonna need ivf etc

idk..all i know is it was never a issue and as the yrs went on during ttc i def put on more weight from meds from eating from just sitting ina room crying

for what it is worth i have made many friends dealing with IF through my own journey and they were all diff sizes..from overweight to underweight toa gym buff to a average person

How much does weight count?

My dr told me weight was a factor but would not put off a cycle because of it. Congrats on your weight loss so far. I would say try to keep going as it might make you more comfortable when pregnant but I would never hold off a cycle just for weight.

How much does weight count?

I was told by my first dr that losing weight could help in the process. I was told by another dr. that since I ovulate and my IF issues were male factor that I should be fine. Every dr has there own beliefs on some issues. Good for you for losing 20lbs though. When I was going through IVF I gained 40lbs and felt awful. I was already overweight but like you I am an emotional eater. Try not to stress over it.

Re: How much does weight count?

I am in the same boat as you! Whatever you do don't go se Dr. Pena! He made me feel so bad about myself! I am going through this challenge with loosing weight. I have lost 15 pounds so far. I see Dr. Halfen over at Rsofny and my weight did not come up once. It's my blocked tube that is an issue. I have serveral friends who are overweight and had no problem having kids at all! While other people that are at adverage weight are having problems. Never go to a Dr that you are uncomfortable with. Dh was afraid I was going to go for him across the table when Pena kept taking about my weight. Allot of people do not like that pratice and have moved on. I have had nothing but good experiences from Rsofny. I wish you lots of luck!!!! FM if you have any questions or need to vent. I've been there/here.

Re: How much does weight count?

Let me start off by saying I am about 80 lbs overweight. I know I need to lose weight, and I am slowly trying to incorporate little changes here and there in my diet and daily life.

My former gyno only saw me as a #, not the fact that all of the tests my pcp preformed came out with great results. All he was concerned about was getting that number down before even thinking about trying to have a baby. That coupled with disgruntled office staff, I switched practices.

My current gyno is the total opposite- so kind, is aware that I am making these changes and commends me on them. He recommend that I see an RE. So DH and I went to LI IVF and met with Dr. Droesch. She is very knowledgable but like my former gyno, just concerned with my weight. Would not treat me until I lost 30lbs. She wanted to put off TTC until I lost this weight and even said I should go on the pill until the weight was lost. Not knowing any better, I took her advice and tried to lose the weight. Went back 2 months later (only down 15lbs since last visit), and again she told me she wouldn't treat me or prescribe me anything until I lost the last 15lbs. That's when DH and I just decided to leave the practice and switch. While I loved the office staff and nurses, the doctors didn't have a great bedside manner.

Then I went to RSofNY and it was like night and day. I met with Dr. Stelling and he is a doll! Weight did not come up in conversation at all until I brought it up. All he suggested was to loose 10% of my body weight , and that was that. He prescribed me metformin for my PCOS, and provera. I just went for my cd 3 testing today, ending up losing 5lbs since last visit and both nurses told me that was great. Such a difference. I met with Dr. halfren and he even said congrats for losing the weight.

Moral of my super long story is if you are not completely 100% happy and have full trust in your RE, then leave. Find one that meets and exceeds all of your expectations. Don't settle and never let any doctor put you down and make you feel bad about yourself. I highly recommend having a consultation with any doctor from RSofNY. From the front desk staff, to the nurses, to the doctors- everyone is amazing there. If you have any specific questions or anything, just FM me.

Best of luck

Re: How much does weight count?

Posted by MrsM429

Let me start off by saying I am about 80 lbs overweight. I know I need to lose weight, and I am slowly trying to incorporate little changes here and there in my diet and daily life.

My former gyno only saw me as a #, not the fact that all of the tests my pcp preformed came out with great results. All he was concerned about was getting that number down before even thinking about trying to have a baby. That coupled with disgruntled office staff, I switched practices.

My current gyno is the total opposite- so kind, is aware that I am making these changes and commends me on them. He recommend that I see an RE. So DH and I went to LI IVF and met with Dr. Droesch. She is very knowledgable but like my former gyno, just concerned with my weight. Would not treat me until I lost 30lbs. She wanted to put off TTC until I lost this weight and even said I should go on the pill until the weight was lost. Not knowing any better, I took her advice and tried to lose the weight. Went back 2 months later (only down 15lbs since last visit), and again she told me she wouldn't treat me or prescribe me anything until I lost the last 15lbs. That's when DH and I just decided to leave the practice and switch. While I loved the office staff and nurses, the doctors didn't have a great bedside manner.

Then I went to RSofNY and it was like night and day. I met with Dr. Stelling and he is a doll! Weight did not come up in conversation at all until I brought it up. All he suggested was to loose 10% of my body weight , and that was that. He prescribed me metformin for my PCOS, and provera. I just went for my cd 3 testing today, ending up losing 5lbs since last visit and both nurses told me that was great. Such a difference. I met with Dr. halfren and he even said congrats for losing the weight.

Moral of my super long story is if you are not completely 100% happy and have full trust in your RE, then leave. Find one that meets and exceeds all of your expectations. Don't settle and never let any doctor put you down and make you feel bad about yourself. I highly recommend having a consultation with any doctor from RSofNY. From the front desk staff, to the nurses, to the doctors- everyone is amazing there. If you have any specific questions or anything, just FM me.

Best of luck

Re: How much does weight count?

Dr. Davis has seen it all. He probably cycles more people than anyone else in the country. He tells the truth, to the best of his knowledge.

Yeah, I have to agree with everyone, I really don't think weight has any impact on IF. I mean its probably a good thing always to be healthier and it couldn't hurt to loose weight for you. But, I have friends of all different shapes and sizes and some had no problems while others do. And congrats on the 20lbs, I gained at one point about 20lbs (and I'm short and bottom heavy so that is a lot for a little person) and I worked really hard to loose it a year ago. I'm not back to my original weight but it was really really hard to loose 14lbs. I struggle with it every day to keep it off. I actually did WW, its the only thing that works for me. But, honestly...I was starving the whole time and I know it was mental hunger because I didn't want to not eat what I wanted.

This will sound odd but I always feel our reproductive systems are its own little entity inside our bodies. Its on its own schedule and sometimes it might remember that its inside a person but most of the time I don't think it really cares....LOL...

Re: How much does weight count?

Posted by MrsM429

Let me start off by saying I am about 80 lbs overweight. I know I need to lose weight, and I am slowly trying to incorporate little changes here and there in my diet and daily life.

My former gyno only saw me as a #, not the fact that all of the tests my pcp preformed came out with great results. All he was concerned about was getting that number down before even thinking about trying to have a baby. That coupled with disgruntled office staff, I switched practices.

My current gyno is the total opposite- so kind, is aware that I am making these changes and commends me on them. He recommend that I see an RE. So DH and I went to LI IVF and met with Dr. Droesch. She is very knowledgable but like my former gyno, just concerned with my weight. Would not treat me until I lost 30lbs. She wanted to put off TTC until I lost this weight and even said I should go on the pill until the weight was lost. Not knowing any better, I took her advice and tried to lose the weight. Went back 2 months later (only down 15lbs since last visit), and again she told me she wouldn't treat me or prescribe me anything until I lost the last 15lbs. That's when DH and I just decided to leave the practice and switch. While I loved the office staff and nurses, the doctors didn't have a great bedside manner.

Then I went to RSofNY and it was like night and day. I met with Dr. Stelling and he is a doll! Weight did not come up in conversation at all until I brought it up. All he suggested was to loose 10% of my body weight , and that was that. He prescribed me metformin for my PCOS, and provera. I just went for my cd 3 testing today, ending up losing 5lbs since last visit and both nurses told me that was great. Such a difference. I met with Dr. halfren and he even said congrats for losing the weight.

Moral of my super long story is if you are not completely 100% happy and have full trust in your RE, then leave. Find one that meets and exceeds all of your expectations. Don't settle and never let any doctor put you down and make you feel bad about yourself. I highly recommend having a consultation with any doctor from RSofNY. From the front desk staff, to the nurses, to the doctors- everyone is amazing there. If you have any specific questions or anything, just FM me.

Best of luck

Message edited 10/2/2012 12:39:06 PM.

Re: How much does weight count?

according to some studies i read when i was doing research on insulin resistance and ivf success, obesity does affect successful outcomes. im not sure how much stock i'd put into it though, since i know plenty of overweight and obese people who have gotten pregnant (naturally or through IF treatments)
congrats on losing that weight!

Re: How much does weight count?

to you.
I know how difficult loss is, failure and infertility roller coasters. It's not easy and I think you need to cut yourself some slack and praise yourself for the courage you have to keep going.
I can't speak from experience but one of my bf's has been struggling with her weight all of her life. I know thats part of the reason she seeks help from a therapist, trainer at the gym, weight watchers, etc. When I went to acupuncture, diet was a HUGE part. Not how much you weigh or how much you eat but what you eat. You may be deficient in vitamins, antioxidents, etc. You may have allergens or inflammation from what you are eating. I supplemented with Chinese herbs and antixodent drinks just to make sure everything was balanced-yin/yang. The Infertility Cure swears by a strict diet, it was a bit extreme for me but I think just trying some or using it as a guideline helped a bit. The Chinese know whats going on for sure! I forget, have you tried Acu?

Re: How much does weight count?

Posted by KMCGK

to you.
I know how difficult loss is, failure and infertility roller coasters. It's not easy and I think you need to cut yourself some slack and praise yourself for the courage you have to keep going.
I can't speak from experience but one of my bf's has been struggling with her weight all of her life. I know thats part of the reason she seeks help from a therapist, trainer at the gym, weight watchers, etc. When I went to acupuncture, diet was a HUGE part. Not how much you weigh or how much you eat but what you eat. You may be deficient in vitamins, antioxidents, etc. You may have allergens or inflammation from what you are eating. I supplemented with Chinese herbs and antixodent drinks just to make sure everything was balanced-yin/yang. The Infertility Cure swears by a strict diet, it was a bit extreme for me but I think just trying some or using it as a guideline helped a bit. The Chinese know whats going on for sure! I forget, have you tried Acu?

Message edited 10/2/2012 3:54:24 PM.