Going from 2 to 3...

We currently have 2 kids ages 4.5 and 2. Hubby and I are considering a 3rd but have concerns. For those of you that have went for it, what were/are your biggest challenges? I'm worried about school schedules and $.

Going from 2 to 3...

Our biggest challenge is daycare. Our twins were 5 when our baby was born and they were in kindergarten but we still have aftercare expenses and things like dance, soccer and girl scouts to pay for plus daycare for the baby. Yes it is hard at times but not because there is another child just money wise and changing schedules. I love having three kids.

Re: Going from 2 to 3...

I have a 4 year old, 2 year old, and am currently pregnant due dec 1. My biggest worry is scheduling. I am a nurse and work part time (2 days a week) in a hospital but I work long days (leave at 6am and dont get home until 830ish). I try to work 1 day that my dh is off and the other my mom watches them. Sometimes it works out and other times my mom watches them the 2 days. I am just concerned if 3 is too much and I should be hiring someone to watch them which also makes me feel uncomfortable because I have never had non-family help.

Re: Going from 2 to 3...

Right now my biggest challenge is just managing all of them. Going from 2 to 3 was a tremendous transition. Everyone jokes around that you are outnumbered but it is NO JOKE. In all seriousness, you are very outnumbered.

My boys are 5, 2 and 10 months. My two littlest are 14 months apart. It is very hard now that the baby is mobile. My 2 year old is a terror and super fast. I dread going anywhere by myself because it is very hard to keep an eye on everyone and tend to their individual needs. I actually have anxiety now with going places. I have always been super laid back but I think because I feel so out of control and it's a safety issue (esp in the summer with pools, beaches and all outdoor activities), I get very uptight. I have two on the move that I have to be on top of constantly. Its exhausting physically and mentally. My oldest is a really good boy but he's still 5 and needs supervision. Even when my DH is around, he deals with one baby, I deal with the other and then someone checks in on my 5 year old.

With regard to caring for them, its an assembly line mentality. It's also divide and conquer. For example, they all go in the bath together. My DH washes them and then I dry and dress them. Sounds like dogs, right? LOL Or if we are at a party, I usually make a plate for the 5 year old, DH feeds the 2 year old and we plop the baby in something to contain him while all of this is going on.

I do anything in my power not to have to take all 3 to the store. It's insanity.

I had to get a new truck. I foresee that my new truck is not going to cut it and a Suburban or something like that will be in my future. I also have to buy all new furniture.

I really can't comment on the money component yet. We aren't there yet. At this point, adding another little mouth to feed and dress hasn't really impacted my bank account. However, I don't pay for daycare so I can't imagine what that must be like.

I like to think that when the babies get bigger it will be easier but I see my coworker stressing about coordinating schedules for sports and other extra curricular activities and it is friggan hectic.

But, despite it all, my baby is the best "mistake" I ever made. He is a dream. I can't imagine my world without him in it. And it's fun having the 3 of them. They love each other so much. Yours will be a little more spread out age wise so it may be a little easier.

Message edited 7/27/2017 2:34:59 PM.

Re: Going from 2 to 3...

Scheduling is definitely a challenge for me with 3, especially now that they are all involved in different activities. Sometimes I just can't get everyone where they need to be by myself.

Money is an issue at times, but I have 1 in daycare now and the other two are in school...I am lucky that my mom and mother in law get them after school and I am home by 4. Next year, my youngest will go to kindergarten and I will probably not need any daycare, which will free up some money for sure.

My husband has a flexible schedule so he helps a lot with the shuttling to activities, but it is hard for me to balance everything and work. We are considering a 4th, but I hesitate just because of the thought of adding another into the mix of things!

Going from 2 to 3...

3 has been fun but hard. Mine are 7, 4 and 15 months. 2 older girls 1 boy. It's been a little crazy this past year lol. But it's working out. I'm a sham and I somehow deal with it all. He comes to whatever activities the girls have. We are in and out of the car all day it seems lol nap time is the hardest b/c he doesn't get full naps in. We are always waking him to go soemwgwre. I try my best but some days it's hard. I'd like to say he's easy going but sometime, most times, he's screaming b/c he wants out of the stroller. All in all he's ok and just kinda deals lol. He's the cutest tihung and I couldn't imagine life without him. I suspect in a few years it will be easier and harder. He'll be older but scheduling and activities will be tougher. I love having 3. It is a lot harder to travel as I'm finding out lol. I do take all 3 food shopping when I have to. The girls a really good girls so that helps me a lot. My 7 yr old is awesome and helpful

Re: Going from 2 to 3...

The scheduling is the hardest part for me. The older 2 have friends & activities. I either have to drag the baby around which makes him miserable or find someone to watch him.

Going from 2 to 3...

my 4.5 year old is an angel so I'm not too worried about him but my 2 year old is the devil LOL. I have the kids in daycare now. son wont go into kindergarten until Sept 2018 around time the baby would arrive if we conceive within the next few months. Hubby and I both work, me in the city and him on the island so nervous about schedules in that respect since I'm out of the house by 7:20 and hubby at 6:45.

Re: Going from 2 to 3...

Message edited 7/27/2017 3:13:25 PM.

Re: Going from 2 to 3...

i have two year old twins and have been thinking about what it would be like to have a third. Some days I tell myself "Are you nuts" but other days I'm like "these two would be the best big sisters!"

We already need a bigger truck which we will be getting by the end of the year and we have the room in our current apartment (though we want to buy a house in the next 3 years or so) so those things aren't an issue.
My biggest issue is adding another on my parents' plate since they watch the twins. I think about waiting so by the time a new baby comes the girls will be in school...but I also just turned 35 so i feel like I don't want to wait too long.



I won't go to the park alone with them. They run in different directions and I'm paranoid that someone will run and snatch one while I chase the other.

Re: Going from 2 to 3...

I have a 9 year old, 5 1/2 year old and a soon to be 3 year old.

1 thing that stinks is vacations! I like going on beach vacations and you can't do 5 in a room. Plus airfare is so expensive. So we've only done FL which kind of stinks. But oh well.

For us, we don't have any help during the school year. My inlaws are FL people so they're gone oct 3-april 20th. So everything is on us... drop offs, pick ups, boy scouts, little league, football, sickness, etc etc. Which we manage but it sucks not having help. It's a good thing i'm organized!

My husband has coached little league the past 3 years so it's been me with the other 2 kids every practice and game. It gets hard keeping 2 small kids contained and entertained for games. So that age difference does stink a little.

I mean it gets hard and sometimes one is coming while the other is going. But we make it work. We work as a team.

Re: Going from 2 to 3...

just want to say God bless you all.

i used to dream of having three kids. i would dream of three boys. i wanted them all taller than me... not a feat at my being only 5'2".

God only blessed me with one baby. i still feel a little empty that i didn't have any more, but i know it was best.

my cousin and my sister have three. i could never pull of the things they do.

again, God bless you all

Re: Going from 2 to 3...

I'm due with my third next month. My boys are 8.5 and 5. My biggest concern is balancing everything. DH and I both work FT, DH has to travel for work at times, DS1 is involved in multiple activities that occur 6 days per week depending on the season, DS2 will start getting more involved in activities now that he's starting K and we don't have family nearby to help out. We've been able to handle the craziness so far, but adding another into the mix is going to be an adjustment.

Some of my friends with 3 say the third pushed them over the edge because they're outnumbered and pulled in every direction while others say that the third completed their family and can't remember what life was like before then. In some ways, the bigger age gap should be easier to manage because I know my kids will help and they're pretty independent, but in other ways, the age gap will be tough due to all of the activities. I know we can scale back on commitments, but my kids love the things they do and I don't want to take those things away from them.

Going from 2 to 3...

i have 3 boys - 5, 3 and 4 months. I would say the biggest struggles are: daycare (my baby was early so we've had 3 months of 3 in daycare $$$), fitting 3 in a car (i had an older trailblazer and had to get something new) and bedrooms (we only have 3 bedrooms so we had to move the older boys in a room together and the first few months were a bit of a nightmare). but these might not be issues for you depending on your situation.

i love having 3. some days are harder than others and going out with all 3 when you are by yourself is hard. never is there a time when all 3 of them are happy. but like everything else, you figure out a system and what works.

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I have 3 boys, 6, 3, and 1. The things I find hard are that since I only work part-time money is very tight now. Obviously we knew this going in, but it's been hard to adjust our lifestyle to our budget.

And as others have said activities. My 6 and 3 yo are a little too far apart to be enrolled in the same classes and I can't sit anywhere with my 3 yo, so I feel like everyone's missing out. But I'm sure it'll get better as they get older.

I definitely would not change anything about having three and I sometimes fantasize about a fourth. But we definitely do not have money or space for that...

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For me the biggest challenge is the guilt of whether I'm giving everybody enough attention and having the energy to be there physically for each kid. And keeping our own sanity when everyone is whining for something lol. Mine are still little.. 3(almost 4), 2, and 4 months. I don't worry much yet about $ or space or schedules because they're still so little, but I'm sure those things might become challenges down the road. It sounds dumb maybe but I kind of just assume things will work out fine and they usually do. They're a tight little bunch and really love each other so it's been so worth it & we'd love to have some more kids if we can.