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phoenix913
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 3034 total posts
Name:
V
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Getting a 3 year old to listen
Anyone have any good techniques for getting their 3 year old to listen to them? I know it's the age and I get that DS won't be perfect all the time, but he's driving me crazy, particularly when his safety is involved.
For instance today I picked him up from daycare and he ran out ahead of me into the parking lot and would not stop when I told him until I yelled so loud the whole neighborhood probably heard me. I also have DS2 in the infant carrier and I usually make sure I have DS1's hand before we open the door. But today he was too fast.
Anyway, just wondering what techniques are working for other moms!
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Posted 6/5/14 4:49 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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NASP09
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Member since 6/05 6030 total posts
Name:
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Re: Getting a 3 year old to listen
It's totally the age, but some things you can do are telling them your expectations beforehand, like, before you leave daycare tell him: " In the parking lot you have to be safe and hold my hand."
Another thing is to give them a "job" - like "Help mommy look out for cars while we cross the parking lot! "
Some parents I know even made a sticker chart for the car. If their kid walks nicely to the car and holds the moms hand they get a sticker. At the end of the day (or 2 days, whatever) they get a little treat . Or if they hold moms hand while walking to the car they get 1 m&m to eat in the car (and they can have more at home, or not, however you want to make it)
These are some things my (teacher) friends do
Message edited 6/5/2014 7:17:25 PM.
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| Posted 6/5/14 7:13 PM |
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Eireann
Two ladies and a gentleman!
Member since 5/05 12165 total posts
Name:
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Re: Getting a 3 year old to listen
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| Posted 6/5/14 7:15 PM |
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Eireann
Two ladies and a gentleman!
Member since 5/05 12165 total posts
Name:
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Re: Getting a 3 year old to listen
Only kidding...no, not really 
Every single day my DS refuses to go to the bathroom in the morning before school and then the whole thing blows up because he just will not listen. Last night, we had a discussion in which he promised to listen and to use the bathroom with no argument. This morning, he was about to flip out again over the bathroom and I gently reminded him of his promise and wouldn't you know...he did it. He'll probably be back to his old tricks tomorrow, but it is worth a shot.
You know, now that I type this out, the whole thing sounds so freakin' ridiculous...the bathroom...sheesh!
Message edited 6/5/2014 7:19:45 PM.
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| Posted 6/5/14 7:18 PM |
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phoenix913
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 3034 total posts
Name:
V
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Re: Getting a 3 year old to listen
Thanks, these are some good suggestions. I'm definitely not expecting a miracle, but if I can at least get him not to run from me that would be good 
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| Posted 6/5/14 9:12 PM |
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nycgirl
Angels!
Member since 3/09 7721 total posts
Name:
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Re: Getting a 3 year old to listen
I count to three. Then punish.
Do it consistently, the counting becomes powerful.
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| Posted 6/5/14 9:30 PM |
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mommyin09
LIF Adult
Member since 3/09 1007 total posts
Name:
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Re: Getting a 3 year old to listen
Posted by nycgirl
I count to three. Then punish.
Do it consistently, the counting becomes powerful.
I do the same.
Message edited 6/5/2014 9:45:50 PM.
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| Posted 6/5/14 9:45 PM |
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luckysmom
Yes it is! Going as planned:)
Member since 6/07 5339 total posts
Name:
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Getting a 3 year old to listen
Go to the library and rent the DVD 1-2-3 Magic. I just did this and it is MAGIC! While i don't 100% agree with the entire way of doing it and have altered it VERY SLIGHTLY, i was willing to try anything at this point. If you watch it (it's about 2 hours) and follow it and are consistent, it works. By the 1st day i saw a HUGE improvement in my 3.5 year old twins' behavior.
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| Posted 6/5/14 10:45 PM |
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MissMeliss
Love my kids
Member since 11/08 1424 total posts
Name:
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Re: Getting a 3 year old to listen
Posted by mommyin09
Posted by nycgirl
I count to three. Then punish.
Do it consistently, the counting becomes powerful.
I do the same.
I've started doing this too. It's been working well so far!
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| Posted 6/6/14 8:22 AM |
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Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!
Member since 8/05 14470 total posts
Name:
Veronica
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Getting a 3 year old to listen
I don't count. I give an option. My way or your way and your way will be unfortunate. I keep her attention as much as I can. I distract. But she doesn't listen. I get in her face and tell her she's being rude. She can either do as I ask or go to time out. Yes then I give her a count down to respond. No response means my choice.
She learned quickly I tell you, warn you punish you. End of story.
If I'm counting its usually before I tickle her! She ears a count and she runs giggling where ever she is! LOL
ETA: at 3 not so much, but nowadays I also apply the same logic to adults around her. I LOATHE when adults will interrupt my daughter talking to me. I tell AJ to wait, turn my body to that person and say "Excuse AJ was talking, one moment please" then turn back to AJ and let her finish. Reverse if she runs up to interrupt I look at her and say the same and she'll stand there slightly contrite and wait.
Message edited 6/6/2014 11:57:06 AM.
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| Posted 6/6/14 10:30 AM |
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maymama
my little loves
Member since 8/08 18453 total posts
Name:
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Re: Getting a 3 year old to listen
we just started a rewards system with my 4 year old. He is getting a BIT better now that he is 4 but its still tough. Good days and bad...
We now have a "pom" jar. He gets 1 pom pom per day as long as he had a good day at daycare and listens, cleans, shares with his sister etc. The reward for 10 poms is ice cream (he is obsessed with froyo from Swirls and Twirls) or a trip to TRU.
So far, we are on day 3 and he has 1 pom.  Already lost his pom for today due to behavior this morning. He is excited about it and I know it will take some time to really work.
Incentives. Do NOT give in to whining, tantrums. Do not pay attention to anything negative. The more negotiating you do, the harder it becomes. Stand firm!
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| Posted 6/6/14 10:41 AM |
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jgl
Love my little boys!!!
Member since 8/07 7060 total posts
Name:
g
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Re: Getting a 3 year old to listen
Posted by maymama
we just started a rewards system with my 4 year old. He is getting a BIT better now that he is 4 but its still tough. Good days and bad...
We now have a "pom" jar. He gets 1 pom pom per day as long as he had a good day at daycare and listens, cleans, shares with his sister etc. The reward for 10 poms is ice cream (he is obsessed with froyo from Swirls and Twirls) or a trip to TRU.
So far, we are on day 3 and he has 1 pom. Already lost his pom for today due to behavior this morning. He is excited about it and I know it will take some time to really work.
Incentives. Do NOT give in to whining, tantrums. Do not pay attention to anything negative. The more negotiating you do, the harder it becomes. Stand firm!
I like this idea but can i give a suggestion, maybe offer more than 1 pom a day maybe because once he has a bad morning there is no incentive to be good the rest of the day.
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| Posted 6/6/14 11:07 AM |
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maymama
my little loves
Member since 8/08 18453 total posts
Name:
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Re: Getting a 3 year old to listen
Posted by jgl
Posted by maymama
we just started a rewards system with my 4 year old. He is getting a BIT better now that he is 4 but its still tough. Good days and bad...
We now have a "pom" jar. He gets 1 pom pom per day as long as he had a good day at daycare and listens, cleans, shares with his sister etc. The reward for 10 poms is ice cream (he is obsessed with froyo from Swirls and Twirls) or a trip to TRU.
So far, we are on day 3 and he has 1 pom. Already lost his pom for today due to behavior this morning. He is excited about it and I know it will take some time to really work.
Incentives. Do NOT give in to whining, tantrums. Do not pay attention to anything negative. The more negotiating you do, the harder it becomes. Stand firm!
I like this idea but can i give a suggestion, maybe offer more than 1 pom a day maybe because once he has a bad morning there is no incentive to be good the rest of the day.
good point !!
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| Posted 6/6/14 11:20 AM |
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dlj97
LIF Adult
Member since 7/10 4399 total posts
Name:
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Re: Getting a 3 year old to listen
1-2-3 Magic
Works wonders for my 3 year old DD!
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| Posted 6/6/14 11:22 AM |
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srella22
LIF Infant
Member since 12/10 136 total posts
Name:
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Re: Getting a 3 year old to listen
Posted by mommyin09
Posted by nycgirl
I count to three. Then punish.
Do it consistently, the counting becomes powerful.
I do the same.
i do this too...it works 99% of the time...i dont ever have to get to three...he says it and stops!
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| Posted 6/6/14 3:35 PM |
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