forget it

.

Message edited 6/7/2012 9:25:24 PM.

Re: What is wrong with pg women?

I don't know... I could see where you're coming from... but I also think it's really important to remember that just because you struggled to get pregnant does not mean you don't have a right to complain once you are. When I lost my baby in the 17th week, I swore I'd never complain about ANYTHING pregnancy related ever again!! .. but then I was pregnant again and realize it doesn't matter HOW appreciative you are to pregnant. Being nauseous STINKS! Being uncomfortable STINKS! .. My road to motherhood has been pretty horrendous so far, but I know that when my baby is up screaming at 4am and I haven't slept in a day and a half, I will be complaining to DH about it for sure! Complaining doesn't make you ungrateful..... and by struggling to get pregnant, you don't give up your right to complain and have be totally thrilled about it 24/7.. That's my opinion, anyway.

As far as the drinking.. people all have their own views on that... I have been around pregnant women who drank sips here and there and while I didn't really agree with it ... it's just one of those things. To each their own, ya know? Different cultures have different beliefs. I know in Ireland they have a drink a day or something. Again, not something I'd do... but then again lots of pregnant women do things I wouldn't...

Sorry they made you so frustrated!!

Message edited 6/7/2012 6:44:12 PM.

Re: What is wrong with pg women?

Posted by PennyCat

I don't know... I could see where you're coming from... but I also think it's really important to remember that just because you struggled to get pregnant does not mean you don't have a right to complain once you are. When I lost my baby in the 17th week, I swore I'd never complain about ANYTHING pregnancy related ever again!! .. but then I was pregnant again and realize it doesn't matter HOW appreciative you are to pregnant. Being nauseous STINKS! Being uncomfortable STINKS! .. My road to motherhood has been pretty horrendous so far, but I know that when my baby is up screaming at 4am and I haven't slept in a day and a half, I will be complaining to DH about it for sure! Complaining doesn't make you ungrateful..... and by struggling to get pregnant, you don't give up your right to complain and have be totally thrilled about it 24/7.. That's my opinion, anyway.

As far as the drinking.. people all have their own views on that... I have been around pregnant women who drank sips here and there and while I didn't really agree with it ... it's just one of those things. To each their own, ya know? Different cultures have different beliefs. I know in Ireland they have a drink a day or something. Again, not something I'd do... but then again lots of pregnant women do things I wouldn't...

Sorry they made you so frustrated!!

Re: What is wrong with pg women?

Re: What is wrong with pg women?

First off, congrats on your BFP!!!

I see where you are coming from because I've been there myself... I did four IVFs before i finally got a BFP. During the time that I was struggling and going through failed IVF after failed IVF, I felt like the entire world was pregnant except for me, but I had one friend in particular who was pregnant and she used to make me really PO'd. She would have a sip of wine from time to time and be like, "what's a sip going to do?" I would never do that while pregnant, but again everyone is different.

Do these women know what you have been going through to get pregnant? If so, they need to be a little more sensitive.... BUT if they haven't been through infertility themselves, they cannot truly understand how we feel or why we might be frustrated at comments like those. And if they don't know about your IF struggles, they would think what they are saying is completely harmless.

As far as the complaining, when i got pg I said I would NEVER complain about pregnancy ailments. That was before I got unrelenting nausea day and night (with daily vomiting) for 8 weeks straight. I would try not to complain to a person I knew was dealing with infertility, but it was so unpleasant- I was SO happy to be pg but every day was painful! I agree with Pennycat that even though you went through IF you are allowed to complain if you want- you can be thrilled to be pregnant but you aren't expected to relish every unpleasant, tired, nauseous moment!

Re: What is wrong with pg women?

first off, sorry they annoyed you!!

but i do agree with the other girls. just because you go through hell to get pregnant does not mean that you won't have complaints once you are actually pregnant. i honestly dont remember complaining about much because i truly loved being pregnant, but many people don't. and just because you went through a lot to get there doesn't mean that when you complain about pregnancy related issues that you are ungrateful. actually, it may feel good to complain about "Regular" pregnancy things. it makes you feel more like a regular person again. going through IF is so hard and you feel like you are different than so many others; its funny once you are pregnant and you become just another "normal" pregnant lady. its almost like "ok, now what?!"

anyway as far as the margaritas go, IMO thats a bit much, but to each their own. i know lots of people who have wine while pregnant, some even believe its healthy (at a minimal amount). i dont remember but i think i may have had a sip or two here or there when i was preg. i also had a piece of sushi once, ate lots of "forbidden" cheeses, ate cold cuts occasionally...etc. did doing those things make me appear ungrateful for being pregnant? i dont know. but again, as far as what you do to your body while pregnant, and what you do to your baby once its here, to each their own. if you think its hard watching pregnant ladies do things you wouldn't do...wait til you're a parent!! every single person parents differently and the things other parents do (maybe even your close friends) might end up seeming appalling to you. so unfortunately, tolerance is something you just develop over time!!

Re: What is wrong with pg women?

I hear you I would do anything to be in their shoes. minus the margaritas