Delete

...thanks

Message edited 3/1/2013 3:42:46 AM.

putting your child first

I'm trying to formulate a well thought out response but all I keep coming up with is your ds needs to grow up a bit. The fact that he wont say goodnight to his own child to spite you makes me sick. What exactly does he want you to do to make him feel special?

Re: putting your child first

I completely understand where you are coming from. I'm pregnant with my first and I feel like life is completely consumed by baby and it will only get worse once LO is here.

Sometimes I get aggravated with DH because I feel like I'm doing all this work preparing for the baby and well, he's not. But he has a point when I've brought it up that it's just who I am.

I know DH will love this child and whatever future children we have god willing. I think it's up to us to let them know what we are having issues with. It sounds like you have been dealing with this for quite a while and are particularly frustrated right now, which is completely understandable.

It sounds like your DH may just be emulating what he grew up with. My DH is the same too. I come from an ethnic family where your kids are your life and always come first so of course, that's my mentality. My DH, not so much. It drives me crazy sometimes but he knows how I am and sometimes I just need to have more patience.

I also think it's important that your child(ren) do not become the be all, end all of your world. I'm afraid that I'm going to be one of those women who are completely wrapped up in their kids and let family, friends, relationships fall by the wayside. I'm already aware of this and going to make a huge and conscious effort not to let that happen. I really admire women who seem to be great moms but also have satisfying careers and healthy relationships with DH and others. That's really what I want too. It's important to remember that children will grow and one day have lives of their own. When it's time to let them fly, I don't want to be left with this awful feeling of what do I do with my life now, kwim.

Hang in there. All relationships have their ups and downs. We've all been there and these are the times we are tested and grow stronger.