BTDT moms tips for moms expecting #2

With my due date 3 weeks away, I figured this would be a good thread for moms that are soon going to be going from 1 DC to 2. Any tips would be great!! I am starting to freak! :) My last day of work is Friday. Some great tips would be:

Taking care of DC while your in the hospital making a smooth transition home
Caring for two kids at one time
How to handle nap time when on different schedules
HOW TO GET DD OUT OF YOUR BED BEFORE BABY COMES!!!


Anything would be helpful!! TIA!

Re: BTDT moms tips for moms expecting #2

just bumping this for you

Re: BTDT moms tips for moms expecting #2

While I was in the hospital my DH dropped my DD off at my moms on his way to the hospital in the morning (generally around 10am). My mom would then bring her up during sibling/grandparents hours (2-4pm at St Charlies) and then bring her back again for general visiting hours (7-8pm). Then my DH would take her home and do her bedtime routine and put her to bed. The first night my DH stayed until 10pm and DD stayed at my mom's overnight because I had a c-section and wasn't moving around too well.

My mom and ILs made a big deal about the baby coming home, we brought presents to give to DD#1 in the hospital and again when we came home, my mom and ILs took DD#1 to get balloons to welcome her new sister home.


When taking care of them I always took care of my older DD if she needed something. DD#2 wouldn't remember if she cried/whimpered/fussed for a min while I helped her sister, but my older DD would remember. I tried to include DD#1 in helping with DD#2 but she really didn't care

They almost never napped at the same time while I was home on maternity leave. We almost always worked around DD#1's nap schedule because DD#2 would sleep wherever and whenever.

DD#1 never slept with us so I can't help with the last one

Re: BTDT moms tips for moms expecting #2

Taking care of DC while your in the hospital making a smooth transition home

- I had my parents here while DH stayed at the hospital with me. I spoke about the baby to DS. I took him with me to BRU to pick out a present from him to the baby. I also purchased a gift from the baby to him. DS was allowed to visit me in the hospital. I always had someone whose main focus was DS so that he could just be a kid and run around when and where he wanted to go with supervision. When he first came to the hospital he (along with the rest of the family) saw the baby behind the glass. I had him come to my room and then the three of us "welcomed" the baby to our family. I propped him in my bed with pillows and let him "hold" his sister.

For each time he came to the hospital - I was there 4 days - I had something small for him.

After I came home, I would have him sit next to me to read or cuddle. Before the baby came I took him to the hospital sibling class. I also got him books on being a big brother. At every chance I had I would point out siblings and show him that other kids had brothers and sisters.

When our family came to see us, I had them make a big deal about him first so that he felt important and not overshadowed by the new baby.

Caring for two kids at one time
Have DC1 bring you a diaper to "help" change the baby. Have them sing to the baby. Read stories with both kids. Have them help show the baby their toys. Have someone else take DC out so they are not stir crazy. You should also try to make one on one time with DC. They are not used to having to share your attention. They still want to be a priority. If the baby and DC are both crying at the same time and the baby is not in danger, answer DC1 first. Explain taking turns - I answered YOU DC1 first last time, now it is DC2s turn to be first. This will set them up for when they are older and need to share your attention and DC2 will realize that you are going to DC1 - this way it cuts down on competition.


How to handle nap time when on different schedules
This is hard. It depends on how old DC1 is....does DC1 still nap? I am going to admit I used a bit more TV than I wanted to for nap time.

HOW TO GET DD OUT OF YOUR BED BEFORE BABY COMES!!!

Get DC1 a big kid bed. New sheets and make it a huge celebration.

Re: BTDT moms tips for moms expecting #2

Taking care of DC while your in the hospital making a smooth transition home

- When I was in the hospital, the swine flu ban was in effect so DS1 didn't come visit. I left instructions for his nap times and meals with DH for the most part. DH came to visit during nap time for the most part while someone stayed with DS. DS was only 20 months so he really didn't get what was going on.

Caring for two kids at one time

- WINE - lots of it! Just kidding! (kind of) My advice for you here, is just do what makes your life easiest. There will times of the day that are harder, and times of the day that are easier. The first few weeks were easier for me, while months 2-3 were a little tougher. Now that DS2 is 6 months we have a pretty good routine (basically DS1's routine, DS2 kind of goes with the flow). And really, when it's really, really tough - a glass of wine. (Luckily for me, that was around dinner time so that kind of worked out!)

Nap schedules
-With DS1, I was a schedule nazi. DS2 is not a big napper. His naps mostly consist on car rides, and I am trying to get him to nap during the middle of the day with DS1. In the beginning, the swing and the bouncer were his nap best friends. It became less stressful for me when I stopped trying to schedule his naps and just let him be. But he is a really content baby even when he is cranky.



HOW TO GET DD OUT OF YOUR BED BEFORE BABY COMES!!!

I don't have real advice for you here, because DS was in a crib. We moved him to a big boy bed when DS2 was 4 months and I was really nervous. IT really worked out better than I expected!

Good luck!

Re: BTDT moms tips for moms expecting #2

Wow ladies thank you!! I will def do gifts for DD when coming to the hospital and coming home. And prob have her do balloons for when baby comes home. She will be 23 months the 22nd and I am due the 24th. I am thinking to try ferber again its worked before but ive had a hard time keeping up with it due to working FT. Friday is my last day and I am planning on trying it again. I was gthinking of converting her bed to a toddler bed but I think she will just get up and come into our room.

Re: BTDT moms tips for moms expecting #2

My kids are 22 months apart and share a bedroom

While I was at hospital my in laws watched my older DS. I left the hospital one day before new DS since he was in NICU. So I took DS#1 with us to "pick up his new brother"

DS#1 was very good with the baby considering in many ways he was still a baby himself.

best advice I received and lived by was to keep DS#1 routine/attention the same as possible since he was older and realized more. I always had DS#1 HELP me with whatever i was doing with the new baby.

DS#1 was/is a great sleeper so he stayed in his room by himself and I set up a portacrib in our room for the first 5 months til he slept thru the night

It is crazy...but fun times

Re: BTDT moms tips for moms expecting #2

I had a huge giftbag of toys for Jack. Every time he came to the hospital he got to open more gifts (and my friends and family also brought him gifts so it was like Christmas morning for him.)

My parents brought him up every day after his nap for about an hour. After that hour he was irritable and wanted to leave. There is only so much they can do in a hospital room.

I am crazy anal so I left daily schedules, and even put his outfits in big Ziploc baggies. No one had ever taken care of him besides me at that point (even DH who works didn't know our EXACT routine at that point)

I let him see the baby asap. He was so great with him from day one, and still to this day has never acted out against his brother.

Remember that if the baby is crying, and your older one needs you - go to the older one. THe baby won't know any better - but your older one will.

I somehow got them on the same napping schedule once a day and it was amazing! I would try to do the same thing. You WILL need the break

Message edited 9/1/2010 10:53:57 AM.

Re: BTDT moms tips for moms expecting #2

Thanks ladies!! really helpful!! Please feel free to add anything else you can think of!! :)