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BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
Did you have a "ladies night out" again?
I think it would be good to go out for a bit a few weeks afterwards, and also give DH some time to "bond" with the baby. My friend is having a party at her house in mid-January, which if all goes as planned, I should have given birth 2-3 weeks before then.
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Posted 12/17/08 1:04 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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NoStressMom
My Heart and Soul
Member since 5/05 11122 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
why not if you feel up to it! Have a good time!!!
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| Posted 12/17/08 1:07 PM |
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Gatsbygirl
Please St. Therese....
Member since 10/07 8494 total posts
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
2 weeks! Go for it! It will do you a world of good 
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| Posted 12/17/08 1:33 PM |
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Kelly9904
Mommy to 2 amazing little boys
Member since 5/05 9306 total posts
Name:
Kelly
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
I can only speak from my experience but I wouldn’t have been ready to leave DS with DH for a girls night at 2-3 weeks. Physically I would have been fine but there just wouldn’t have been a chance I would have wanted to leave him! I left him at 4 weeks with my MIL so DH and I could go to a movie for my birthday and what was hard enough.
But you have to do what you are comfortable with…if you feel up to it great! But I would just keep it open with your friends because you may not be physically up to it (especially if you go late) even if you are emotionally okay with it.
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| Posted 12/17/08 1:34 PM |
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
I also bring this up because I've spoken with friends who said their "biggest mistake" was not letting DH be alone with the baby from very early on...........that they ended up taking the more active role, which lead him to being more passive about everything. Sometimes to the point of being scared to do simple things.Thoughts? Maybe that should be a different thread!!!
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| Posted 12/17/08 1:40 PM |
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Kelly9904
Mommy to 2 amazing little boys
Member since 5/05 9306 total posts
Name:
Kelly
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
Posted by mzsocialworker1
I also bring this up because I've spoken with friends who said their "biggest mistake" was not letting DH be alone with the baby from very early on...........that they ended up taking the more active role, which lead him to being more passive about everything. Sometimes to the point of being scared to do simple things.Thoughts? Maybe that should be a different thread!!!
My DH has stayed with DS alone while I worked or went out etc. He had little experience before DS and it took a bit for him to feel confident and ready to take care of DS alone. But with that said DH is very active participant with DS, he will feed him, change a diaper, buy formula without my prompting, plays with, etc. There are certain things he will not do alone ie bathe.
I probably didn’t leave DS alone with DH for quite awhile after he was born, but I can’t imagine that he would be any more active if I did.
I think a lot of that has to do with the dad’s personality and also how the mother treats the dad while they are together. For example if every time the dad feeds the baby the mother says “no not like that do it this way…” or “you are doing that wrong”…then the Dad gets the idea that the Mom doesn’t trust them and therefore they don’t want to do more because they are just going to be criticized.
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| Posted 12/17/08 1:52 PM |
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Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!
Member since 10/05 29450 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
If it's local and you can back out at the last minute I say try and go.
I had a c-section and while I was out and about days after I got home - the nighttime was the worst and my pain would kick in.
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| Posted 12/17/08 2:03 PM |
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Bops
My 3 wishes
Member since 12/07 13625 total posts
Name:
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
I was a c-section and went to my BFF 30th b-day 11 days after DS was born...My DH is very competent and ITA w/ the other ladies, leaving DC alone w/ DH is very important for both of them IMO...I have seen 2 good friends marriage suffer from mommy being too over-protective w/ baby leaving lots of resentment and they both see it now and unfortuantely it was too late to change because damage was done  ...If you are feeling up to it, I say go for it - you're only a phone call away !
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| Posted 12/17/08 2:07 PM |
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CkGm
They get so big, so fast :(
Member since 5/05 13848 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
I say do it-even if you don't feel comfortable. Those first few weeks you feel so trapped and even if you don't want to leave the baby- do it. You will feel a little more like your old self which is really important in the beginning
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| Posted 12/17/08 2:10 PM |
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
Posted by mzsocialworker1
I also bring this up because I've spoken with friends who said their "biggest mistake" was not letting DH be alone with the baby from very early on...........that they ended up taking the more active role, which lead him to being more passive about everything. Sometimes to the point of being scared to do simple things.Thoughts? Maybe that should be a different thread!!!
I have heard this several times and I find that a lot of women that I know have "enabled" this in their DH's. IMO I think if you are feeling well then there is no reason why you shouldn't go! I know in my house I will want my DH to do the same things that I do: bathe, diapers, feed, walk, burp, etc whether I am home or not!
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| Posted 12/17/08 2:12 PM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
I didn't and to be honest, and this is just me, at 2-3 weeks I was not at all ready to be away from the baby. I just wanted to be with her every minute and on top of that I was still recovering my C-section and I was tired so I wasn't really interested in going out. But that's just me. If you're up to it I say go for it!! 
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| Posted 12/17/08 2:16 PM |
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pinkandblue
Our family is complete, maybe
Member since 9/05 32436 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
Our 1st year anniversary was about 3 weeks after dd was born. We left her with my mom and went out for dinner and drinks...it was GREAT
I say go for it. It is alot easier to leave a newborn as all they do is sleep, eat and poop 
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| Posted 12/17/08 2:24 PM |
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mindygirl73
LIF Adolescent
Member since 2/07 692 total posts
Name:
reens
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
I say if you feel good...go for it. It's nice to get out anyway. I'm sure your DH is more than competant enough to handle a newborn. How long would you be gone..2-3 hours anyway?
It would be a nice night out :) The baby isn't going anywhere..lol!
Enjoy!
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| Posted 12/17/08 2:33 PM |
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isabelle2137
LIF Adult
Member since 12/06 1076 total posts
Name:
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
Posted by NextStopBabytown
Posted by mzsocialworker1
I also bring this up because I've spoken with friends who said their "biggest mistake" was not letting DH be alone with the baby from very early on...........that they ended up taking the more active role, which lead him to being more passive about everything. Sometimes to the point of being scared to do simple things.Thoughts? Maybe that should be a different thread!!!
I have heard this several times and I find that a lot of women that I know have "enabled" this in their DH's. IMO I think if you are feeling well then there is no reason why you shouldn't go! I know in my house I will want my DH to do the same things that I do: bathe, diapers, feed, walk, burp, etc whether I am home or not!
What she said
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| Posted 12/17/08 2:46 PM |
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Myababy
LIF Adult
Member since 7/08 1171 total posts
Name:
Shira
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
My dh knows very well that I plan to go out with the girls soon after I deliver. He owes me big time after these 9 mos and I plan to take full advantage of that!!!!! I think he is actually looking forward to being alone with the baby which I love.
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| Posted 12/17/08 3:03 PM |
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Lauren82
LIF Adult
Member since 10/06 4580 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
I'm 3 weeks PP now and we went to a family party in the same town last weekend...it was fine, but the only reason I was hesitant and am still hesitant to leave the baby home without me is that she is EBF and its nearly impossible for me to predict her feeding patterns yet (she still feeds on demand and cluster feeds, especially in the evenings)...if you are formula feeding, it will be much easier to leave without that worry!
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| Posted 12/17/08 4:08 PM |
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beachgirl
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 7967 total posts
Name:
sara
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
I would say you will have to wait until after baby is born as everything you think you will do after your little one is born most likely will change- I know it did for me but I didnt leave her for nearly a year and then it was only because I had to attend a work thing.
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| Posted 12/17/08 4:15 PM |
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
Thanks! I am planning to formula feed and the "party" is less than 5 minutes from home.
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| Posted 12/17/08 4:15 PM |
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Alli06
Baby #3 coming this June
Member since 8/05 6721 total posts
Name:
A
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Re: BTDT Moms: How soon after the baby.......
Posted by mzsocialworker1
I also bring this up because I've spoken with friends who said their "biggest mistake" was not letting DH be alone with the baby from very early on...........that they ended up taking the more active role, which lead him to being more passive about everything. Sometimes to the point of being scared to do simple things.Thoughts? Maybe that should be a different thread!!!
I think this is completely true!! They need to get experience, and feel comfortable.
My friend is due a week before me. We already plan on going out to dinner a few weeks after the baby. I would say when the baby was at least 4 weeks.
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| Posted 12/17/08 4:30 PM |
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