Biter in my child's class...what to do?

Today was DD was bitten HARD on her cheek by another child in the class (3&4 year old class). Skin was broken. It was completely unprovoked. Thank god she is fine. My daughter is a trooper. The teachers were extremely responsive and we're not in the wrong.

My DD has been the 4th victim of this girl this year (there are only 9 kids in her class). I 'heard' that after the last incident she was told that if there was one more incident she would be asked to leave the school. However, when I went up to school today, it didn't seem like that was going to be the case.

I feel terrible for the mother of this child. I know if the tables were turned I'd be so upset. I'd also be beside myself if my kid was asked to leave the school. I know that biting happens. But 4 times? I don't want this to happen to another child.

I'm conflicted. What would you do?

Message edited 2/4/2016 8:19:23 PM.

Re: Biter in my child's class...what to do?

Message edited 2/4/2016 8:21:16 PM.

Biter in my child's class...what to do?

what did the teacehr say they would do?

The need to shadow that child. Like obsessively. One teacher on her at all times.

Tell your daughter to try not to be near her. and watch out. It's so hard b/c

Biter in my child's class...what to do?

I think you need to speak to the director and how it will be handled moving forward. I wouldn't approach them with hearsay. Even though you "heard" she may be kicked out, it may not be the case. Explain that you are concerned and want to know their plan to diffuse the situation.

Biter in my child's class...what to do?

That's terrible - I feel so bad for your DD and the other child.

I would ask what their biting policy is and if this girl has bitten other children. If they say yes, I would be more firm in saying, then how do we proceed? The onus is on THEM to make it a safe environment for ALL children.

Biter in my child's class...what to do?

It's a hard one - especially since by 3-4, the biting phase is usually over.

I would ask the director what the plan is - maybe suggest a shadow for the child?

Biter in my child's class...what to do?

Just ask for the plan. They will have to address it in some way. My guess is they will try a shadow before actually kicking out a student. But that student is a liability to them so any good daycare will address it.

I get how you are Wheeling. My DS was bitten on the face by a child also. Luckily for me the kid moved shortly after so I didn't have to worry.

Biter in my child's class...what to do?

My DS got bit 3 times in one week - right after he got moved up to the toddler room. Twice by another little boy and once by a girl since he pulled/ripped out some of her hair (that one I kinda understood). He was the youngest one in the room by about 6 months so I think he was an easy target. They assured me that they were shadowing the biter (as he had bit other kids in the past) and it has not been an issue since (November).

I'd make sure that they were shadowing the biter ESPECIALLY since this is happening in the 3-4 room. In the toddler room, it is more of a developmental thing.

Message edited 2/5/2016 9:18:14 AM.

Re: Biter in my child's class...what to do?

I've been on both sides of this, though DS was much younger. And the biting was one or two times. But the school always had a plan to address it. I'm sure yours does, too.

Most likely the parents of the other child are trying to address the issue at home, too. I'm sure the school has a plan. Just ask the school what the plan is and take it from there.

Hope your DD is feeling better!

Biter in my child's class...what to do?

I agree...meet with director. Express your concern.
Don't discuss hearsay. Ask what the policy is. Ask what they have in plCe to be sure this doesn't happen again. While biting is considered "normal toddler behavior" don't let them just dismiss it as that. The biter needs a shadow. They need to be able to document what directly precedes the bite so they can know what to watch for to be able to keep all the kids safe.

It's important not to take it out on the other child or parent. That parent is likely horrified and the kid just needs to be given other outlets. (The buter in my child's room was given a teething necklace and something else to hopefully curb it.)

Re: Biter in my child's class...what to do?

Thanks all.

Spoke with director. They're in the process of making a decision. This is habitual with her and is escalating. She has a lot of agression and anger issues. She seems to prey on the more introverted kids.

They don't have the resources to shadow this one child. It's a small school. Unfortunately I think their only course of action is going to be to kick her out. I feel awful. I really hope the mother doesn't think I'm advocating for her child to get kicked out...but the way this is progressing, I know the school can't allow it to continue.

Re: Biter in my child's class...what to do?

the mother shouldn't know much info just that her child bit. now i know the child will tell but the mother should not know you talked to the director