Awkward situation

So we have these friends that are engaged. The guy is the best friend of DH's close friend. We have known him for years. But he never calls anyone, so we all speak to his fiance- who is very sweet.

The thing about this couple is that they fight, a lot, in public. In fact, the 4 of us went out to celebrate their engagement, and it ended after dinner (we were supposed to go for drinks) becauase they spent 15 minutes fighting outside the restaurant. We stepped away and decided to go home.

Well I called her on Sunday and she sounded very upset. SO I ask what is wrong. She tells me that she is unhappy with the way he speaks to her (which I totally understand. I have seen it).

Now what do you say in that situation?

I told her to express her needs in a calm non-accusatory way maybe the next day. She said she has. I told her it will all work out because they love each other so much (which they do). Everything I suggested she said she has already done. I didn't know what to say. I kept saying I'm sorry she is going through this and they will work it out because they love each other. But I don't want to get in the middle of their relationship, you know.

Re: Awkward situation

If you are close enough to her, I might say something like "There's no shame in premarital counseling. Sometimes it can really help and bring you closer together."

She shouldn't be starting out this upset... I'd try to find a delicate way to suggest counseling before they tie the knot!

Re: Awkward situation

I agree with the pp. If you are not comfortable telling her to see a premarital counselor perhaps suggest sending them to see the priest or rabbi who will marry them.

Re: Awkward situation