Anyone ever get told NOT to have another?

So I was talking to my "friend" (another story for another time). She and her DH have a 2 1/2 yr old boy and a 7 month old boy.

The conversation started with her asking me how I am feeling, etc. Then somehow it came out with her saying to me "Trust me, you do NOT want another." I didn't know what to say to that. I just said "Well, let's get through this one first and see what happens. But if we can afford another, we would love another." She again stated to "trust her" and we won't want another. I just shrugged it off and said again, "Let's get through baby #1 first."

But seriously, just because they may feel overwhelmed, stressed, etc. doesn't mean we wouldn't use that to make a decision for US. And maybe being stressed and overwhelmed would be all worth it for us.

Sheesh!

Ok, vent over.

Re: Anyone ever get told NOT to have another?

Ugh people will never learn, I gotta say the only thing I give advice on is wedding advice, I ALWAYS say, listen to no one and try to enjoy everything, I think I'll continue that for future preggos I come across. But I feel like you can never escape it

Re: Anyone ever get told NOT to have another?

my grandmother and mother are telling me not to have another

It def. sucks but the bottom line is you'll do whats best for you, DH and your family

Re: Anyone ever get told NOT to have another?

I agree with both of you.

What I don't understand is why she is already giving me this "advice" when I am only 18 weeks with #1.

Re: Anyone ever get told NOT to have another?

That sounds like really stupid advice IMO! I think I would have said something like "Wow, I'm sorry you're having such a hard time! I've never heard anyone feel that way before, I hope things get easier for you."

I seriously never heard a parent say that before and I think it's just really sad that she feels that way. I would let her "advice" go in one ear and out the other!

Re: Anyone ever get told NOT to have another?

Posted by 2ForMeIn2011

my grandmother and mother are telling me not to have another

Re: Anyone ever get told NOT to have another?

That is really out of line for her. She could have said "Wow, I never thought going from 1 to 2 would be so difficult" and let it be at that.

Unfortunately, no matter what phase of life I seem to be in, I am constantly getting unsolicited advice, which can be so darn hurtful.

Try not to take it to heart. People that are miserable like to have company!

Re: Anyone ever get told NOT to have another?

Ugh. I hate when people think that their particular feelings/situation is universal and somehow makes them an expert on things. Don't people realize that everyone is different?!?!?

Re: Anyone ever get told NOT to have another?

What the fluck is wrong with people!?

It's amazing how joyful events can bring out some serious misery in other people.

Just because YOU are feeling some negative things doesn't mean you need to pass that negativity onto me.

I wish people would keep their dumb comments to themselves.

Re: Anyone ever get told NOT to have another?

My SIL said that to me two weeks ago. I almost told her to shut the f up because I didn't need her opinions on the matter. I was SO ANGRY at her. Just because her irresponsible @ss got pregnant at 19 and then again by accident 2 years later ("oh you have to take birth control for a month before it starts working?") while her husband was home from leave from the army doesn't mean that the rest of us aren't happy with how our lives are going. Her monsters were running around my house destroying things while she took a nap on my couch while I was struggling to keep my eyes open with my month-old child. She should've been offering to let us nap while she visited, but instead I had to chase her kids who have no discipline all over the place. B!tch doesn't have any idea what she's talking about. Just because she regrets the choices she made in her short life (she's 25 next week) doesn't mean she has to try to tell me (I'm 32 in a few months) what to do.

Just thinking about that day still p!sses me the f off. I don't really get angry about much, but her telling me to only have one child REALLY made me angry. We love our daughter and feel extremely blessed, but I did not need her to weigh in on the matter. Ugh just thinking about it makes me enraged again!!!!

So, I know what you mean. People should mind their own f'n business.

Re: Anyone ever get told NOT to have another?

I can't tell you how many times people have told me I'm insane, or just given me a look like I'm insane this pregnancy.
So many comments were made before I got pregnancy that since I already had a boy and a girl I must be done. Like that means I don't want any more kids.

Re: Anyone ever get told NOT to have another?

that is so dumb of her! none of her freakin business! just because she doesnt want another..geez.
I have the opposite problem..people are always asking me when I am going for #3! I'm like hello, can I give birth to #2 first??