Almost 5 year old ds really acting out

I know that it's mostly jealousy (of his baby sister- almost 2) but it's making me so sad. My once sweet angel baby boy is now saying things like "I hate you" Breaks my heart. I know he doesn't mean it but I hate that he feels the need to say hurtful things (to Me, DD and DH). He's perfect in school and at times, he's still that awesome kid he always was. When he does this I tell him how hurt I am and if it continues, I take things away. Anyone been through this or have words of advice?

Re: Almost 5 year old ds really acting out

I'm in the same boat with DD age 4. No great advice but a and hope they grow out of it soon b/c it is hard not to take it personally.

Re: Almost 5 year old ds really acting out

Wow, I could have almost written this word for word. My DD is 5 and I have a 2 year old DS. DD does the same thing, says she hates us, says we hate her, love DS more, we do more with him. I have tried so many times to explain we love them both the same, but certain things he can not do and needs us....it is like talking to a brick wall. My DD inherited the stubborness of my father and I. We just do the best we can to give her as much attention as we can when DS takes naps and goes to bed, more one on one individual time. I also take her out with me when I have to run errands, to give her more mommy attention. I know it is just a phase and it will pass.

Re: Almost 5 year old ds really acting out

DS is almost 4 and was going through a short phase like this and I totally see it coming back and getting worse as he gets older. I wrote something similiar a month or so ago. He was saying things like mommy I don't like you. Made me so sad. Especially bc he's so sweet and usually passive.
Oh, and perfect in school too.
Sorry I'm no help. I guess you will have to ignore and let him know those words hurt mommy's feeling and him expressing himself is one thing, but saying mean and hurtful things is another.

Re: Almost 5 year old ds really acting out

Thanks ladies, I appreciate the responses. So tough. He is so much better when his sister naps or we have 1 on 1 time.Very frustrating. She loves her big bro so much and he wants nothing to do with her. I hope it changes as they get older. I'm just shocked how mean and fresh he can be. I put him on a behavior chart. 3 Baseball magnets on the fridge. If he gets 3 strikes he loses one of his fave things (wii, trucks, etc.) Hope it helps somewhat. So hard to figure out proper consequences

Re: Almost 5 year old ds really acting out

There must be something in the water with the 5 yo's.We though it was the excitement with his birthday but now that's over, he hasn't stopped. He isn't mean to his 2 1/2 yo sister; he just teaches her bad habits. He thinks its hysterical. He also is extremely defiant.

I started the Melissa and Doug responsibility chart - which also has a lot of actions as well as chores...I.e no teasing, apologizing, ect. We are also doing the 3 strikes and you lose a privilege. Tonight he got early bedtime.....for teaching his sister for talking back to me....And doing it himself. He promised me he wouldn't do it tomorrow. I can only wish......

Message edited 3/12/2013 11:29:00 PM.

Re: Almost 5 year old ds really acting out

Posted by babydreaming

There must be something in the water with the 5 yo's.We though it was the excitement with his birthday but now that's over, he hasn't stopped. He isn't mean to his 2 1/2 yo sister; he just teaches her bad habits. He thinks its hysterical. He also is extremely defiant.

I started the Melissa and Doug responsibility chart - which also has a lot of actions as well as chores...I.e no teasing, apologizing, ect. We are also doing the 3 strikes and you lose a privilege. Tonight he got early bedtime.....before his sister for talking back to me. He promised me he wouldn't do it tomorrow. I can only wish......

Re: Almost 5 year old ds really acting out

Posted by cj7305

Posted by babydreaming

There must be something in the water with the 5 yo's.We though it was the excitement with his birthday but now that's over, he hasn't stopped. He isn't mean to his 2 1/2 yo sister; he just teaches her bad habits. He thinks its hysterical. He also is extremely defiant.

I started the Melissa and Doug responsibility chart - which also has a lot of actions as well as chores...I.e no teasing, apologizing, ect. We are also doing the 3 strikes and you lose a privilege. Tonight he got early bedtime.....before his sister for talking back to me. He promised me he wouldn't do it tomorrow. I can only wish......

Haha! Yes, this is where we got the baseball magnets. ABove the baseballs I have the no hitting, no whining and clean up after yourself as the goals.