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Job advice needed: stay put or apply?

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FirstMate
My lil cowboy

Member since 10/10

7789 total posts

Name:

Job advice needed: stay put or apply?

I am an attorney. I had been wanting to make a move from my firm. I just found out that one of the firms I had been into is hiring and looking for someone with my exact qualifications.

The problem is I am newly pregnant. The firm I'm with now is laid back and family friendly. This other firm is closer to my house, not as laid back and definitely not family friendly. However, if I wasn't pregnant, I would be hand delivering my resume right now because, professionally, it's more my speed.

The timing on this whole thing couldn't be worse. I would really love to work there but I'm not sure it will be conducive to being a mom. Not only that, but I feel like if I tell them I'm pregnant, it will be...frowned upon for lack of better words. Does anyone hire a pregnant woman?

Do I even send my resume?

If I'm offered the interview and/or job, when do I tell them I'm pregnant?

Or do I just stay where I am, knowing they are fine with me coming and going as needed?

I'm not even sure how to prioritize. I worked so hard for my career that I don't want to put to the wayside but how do you balance that with being a mom?

Posted 1/20/11 3:14 PM
 
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jilliibabii
Mrs. O'Connor

Member since 6/10

12821 total posts

Name:
Jillian

Re: Job advice needed: stay put or apply?

It can never hurt to send in your resume. I would definitely apply, but I think you should tell them about your pregnancy if you get any sort of response- an e-mail, phone call, interview, anything.

Posted 1/20/11 3:24 PM
 

Cacarina
Two girls!

Member since 12/09

2971 total posts

Name:
Cari

Re: Job advice needed: stay put or apply?

Honestly, if you do decide to go for the new job...DON'T tell them you are pregnant. Whether it is legal or not, they likely will not hire you because you are pregnant. Sad, but true.

Also - do absolutely HATE your current job, or do you just want to make a move because you are ready for something new? If you don't hate your job, I would stay put because a family friendly firm is definitely a positive thing when you are pregnant and a new mother, imo.

Posted 1/20/11 3:30 PM
 

Cheeks24
Living a dream

Member since 1/08

8589 total posts

Name:
Cheeks

Re: Job advice needed: stay put or apply?

Posted by Cacarina

Honestly, if you do decide to go for the new job...DON'T tell them you are pregnant. Whether it is legal or not, they likely will not hire you because you are pregnant. Sad, but true.

Also - do absolutely HATE your current job, or do you just want to make a move because you are ready for something new? If you don't hate your job, I would stay put because a family friendly firm is definitely a positive thing when you are pregnant and a new mother, imo.



I agree.

Posted 1/20/11 3:32 PM
 

jilliibabii
Mrs. O'Connor

Member since 6/10

12821 total posts

Name:
Jillian

Re: Job advice needed: stay put or apply?

Posted by Cacarina

Honestly, if you do decide to go for the new job...DON'T tell them you are pregnant. Whether it is legal or not, they likely will not hire you because you are pregnant. Sad, but true.

Also - do absolutely HATE your current job, or do you just want to make a move because you are ready for something new? If you don't hate your job, I would stay put because a family friendly firm is definitely a positive thing when you are pregnant and a new mother, imo.



We had this situation. We had an attorney start at the firm, withheld that she was 3 mos. prego, and only told people when she started showing here. She's no longer working for us. They will find any excuse to get rid of you. Anything.

I think you should tell them about the pregnancy, better to not get hired and still have your other job to fall back on than to get fired from your brand new job with a newborn and nothing to fall back on.

Posted 1/20/11 3:35 PM
 

jambalady
Is it summer yet?

Member since 8/06

7392 total posts

Name:
Holly

Re: Job advice needed: stay put or apply?

Posted by Cacarina

Honestly, if you do decide to go for the new job...DON'T tell them you are pregnant. Whether it is legal or not, they likely will not hire you because you are pregnant. Sad, but true.

Also - do absolutely HATE your current job, or do you just want to make a move because you are ready for something new? If you don't hate your job, I would stay put because a family friendly firm is definitely a positive thing when you are pregnant and a new mother, imo.



ITA. your priorities career-wise may change a little once you are a mom.

Starting a new job PG and coming back after maternity leave is very stressful, especially with a newborn at home.

Posted 1/20/11 3:41 PM
 

FirstMate
My lil cowboy

Member since 10/10

7789 total posts

Name:

Re: Job advice needed: stay put or apply?

Posted by jilliibabii

We had this situation. We had an attorney start at the firm, withheld that she was 3 mos. prego, and only told people when she started showing here. She's no longer working for us. They will find any excuse to get rid of you. Anything.




This is what scares me. I have 2 friends who were let go because it was determined their position was not a necessity while they were out on maternity leave.

I definitely don't hate where I work. I actually like it here a lot. It's a matter of advancing professionally to move to the other firm.

Posted 1/20/11 3:50 PM
 

julz33
i run for bacon

Member since 5/05

20584 total posts

Name:
julz

Re: Job advice needed: stay put or apply?

I would wait to see how you feel after having the baby. Family friendly is good... for me I traded a my f/t job for a flexible p/t job that is family friendly. Priorities change after having kids. I would wait it out and after materinty leave if you are still interested in that firm then go for it. (I know, they might not be hiring at that time, but I wouldn't waste the one shot now)

Posted 1/20/11 4:07 PM
 

CaseyGirl
Mommy to 3 Boys :)

Member since 5/05

19978 total posts

Name:
Jen - counting my blessings...

Re: Job advice needed: stay put or apply?

I agree....with a new baby you will want a family-friendly environment and you will also still have your FMLA protection (assuming your current employer qualifies for it).

Posted 1/20/11 4:15 PM
 

EclecticEsq10810
Bored Esq.

Member since 10/10

2156 total posts

Name:
L.

Re: Job advice needed: stay put or apply?

Ugh I feel your pain" I'm also an attorney and have been victim to past layover, downsizing, office politicking , you name it..it sucks but law is still a profession where men will look for any reason to punish women and our quest to balance work and family...unfortunately this is why I will not be having kids at all- I'm afraid my career will be pushed to the back burner once I have kids)..and I'm fortunate because I work as staff counsel for a large insurance company where my firm is 80% female and the head partner is a woman with 2 kids..but even so....

Is the new firm run by any women at all? I would still apply but wait until an actual job offer is given to you...you never know if maybe you won't get an offer but in a year or 2 the person they hired over you decides to leave and they will ask you to interview again or something..(law firms can be a small world that way). Either way, weigh the options but def don't quit your job to leave for another firm which is not as family friendly...

Good luck!Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 1/20/11 9:14 PM
 

newroctransplant
LIF Infant

Member since 2/09

173 total posts

Name:

Re: Job advice needed: stay put or apply?

I am an attorney who is also a new mommy. I totally understand the conflict. My current firm is VERY family friendly and it has been a blessing to have that flexibility with the baby. In fact the flexibility lets me feel like I am not throwing away what i worked so hard to attain (career) and I still feel like I am very involved with my daughter and her upbringing.

Good Luck with your decision!!!!

Posted 1/20/11 9:24 PM
 

Domino
Always My Miracle

Member since 9/05

9922 total posts

Name:

Re: Job advice needed: stay put or apply?

I would stay where you are until after you have the baby. Babies tend to change ones perspective and priorities.

You would be interested in this new firm because of career growth, however, being in the legal field (not an attorney), starting a new job while newly pregnant is not a path for career growth. If you are upfront from the start they 9 times out of 10 wont hire you. Sad but true. If you keep it to yourself, then they feel misled and you're gone as well.

Flexibility in terms of a family friendly firm is SO important before and after having a baby...doctor appts, etc. I wouldnt trade that!

Good luck in your decisionChat Icon

Posted 1/21/11 6:40 AM
 

MorningCuppaCoffee
Tired!

Member since 12/07

16353 total posts

Name:
Allison

Re: Job advice needed: stay put or apply?

As a F/T working mother, I agree that staying put is in your absolute best interest. There are a few things I don't like about my employer, however, I have to give them credit 110% for being extremely family friendly.

They even worked it out so I could make money doing stuff for them at home while I was out on maternity leave.


It sounds cliche, but it also could just be your hormones making you crave a change right now. I know when I was pregnant I started thinking I wanted to find a new job too.

There's a lot going on in our heads when we are preggers!

I know the economy is in the toilet, but I also strongly feel that when the timing is right, the right job opportunities will STILL be there.

Message edited 1/21/2011 10:49:55 AM.

Posted 1/21/11 10:49 AM
 

MrsS2005
Mom of 3

Member since 11/05

13118 total posts

Name:
B

Re: Job advice needed: stay put or apply?

I'd probably stay put. Being at a family friendly place is a huge bonus. I don't know what your childcare arrangements are, but if DC is going to daycare, chances are the first year will be rough with a lot of illnesses. It would be really nice to have the flexibility to work from home or even take the day off to care for DC.

Your feelings about your career may also change once DC is born. You may value a family friendly place even more. If not, you could always send your resume in after DC is born. Although firms may not publicly advertise a position, if the they came across the right resume and candidate, they may consider making a spot for you.

If you do decide to send your resume now, I wouldn't say anything about the pregnancy. The only time I'd disclose it is after receiving an offer.

Posted 1/23/11 10:30 AM
 
 

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