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Message edited 3/3/2010 7:09:30 PM.

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

We do every other one. We used to do dessert at one dinner at the other but we stopped that when we had Damien.

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

thanksgiving= rotate years, One year in Long island with my family, next year upstate with his.

christmas eve- My family celebrates christmas on xmas eve so we spend it with mine

christmas day- his family celebrates it on xmas day so we spend it wih his.

Easter- not really a big deal. But once we have kids we'll also rotate this holiday.


it was pretty easy with us.

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

having divorced parents makes things extra crazy

thanksgiving: either with my mom or his parents, never my dad

christmas eve: late afternoon/evening with my dad, night at his parents

christmas: at my mom's

easter: brunch with my mom, his family is not big on easter

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

Solved this one really easily, DH is Jewish, I am Catholic....the holidays are so easy!!!

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

It used to be:
Thanksgiving - alternate dinner and brunch between my parents & his or combine everyone.

Christmas Eve - ILs (MIL's preference)
Christmas Day - my moms

Easter Day - alternate dinner and brunch between my parents & his.

Mother's Day and Father's day- alternate dinner and brunch between my parents & his or combine everyone.

Now that ILs have moved to FL, we go to SILs or just my parents unless they're up from FL.

We both didn't like the idea of having one holiday with one set of parents. I think it's unfair to expect one person not to see his/her parents for the holidays. DH preferred to have dinner at my parent's house (they live 6 minutes from us) so we didn't have to deal with traffic on the way home.

If it's ok with you, your DH & the parents NOT to see you on major holidays, then alternate. I was never comfortable with skipping days like Mother's Day with our moms. Also there was no way DH was going to make a one day holiday into a 2 day one because someone can't share the day.

Message edited 10/15/2006 7:44:31 AM.

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

Honestly, we don't really. DH works every single holiday. We never even get a 3-day weekend, because his "weekend" is Friday and Saturday. Cablevision never closes...not even on Christmas.

ETA: We usually see his side of the family on his days off, so we rarely have a conflict.

Message edited 10/15/2006 7:59:26 AM.

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

Pretty easy..

Thanksgiving - alternates every year
Passover - each family gets one night
Rosh Hashanah - each family gets one night
Yom Kippur - one gets the start of the fast, the other gets the other
Mother's Day - half the day at one house, the other at the other house.

The tricky one is always Father's Day..his father always insists we spend most of the day with his 2 brothers and their families at a country club. I heard a rumor that may end though..he'll still insist on having most of the day. My father ALWAYS gets shafted. Don't get me started on who has been a better father though.

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

We're still trying to figure this out. DH is NYPD so that makes it even trickier because he's not home for most holidays. Here's what we've done in the past (pre-wedding)...

Thanksgiving - my family eats early (2 o'clock dinner) so we eat with them in Franklin Square, then drive to Astoria for his families' 6 o'clock dinner and do it all over again. In the meantime, gaining about 20 pounds!

Christmas - depends when he is off. This year we volunteered to host Christmas Eve for both families since DH is working Christmas Day, then I will spend Christmas Day with my family, and I'll leave when DH gets off of work (after my fam has dinner) and head up to White Plains for his family's huge party.

Easter - not an issue, since he is Greek Orthodox, we only have to worry about it every 4 years. Though the men in his family have an annoying tradition of going to the car show at the javits center on Catholic Easter so he always shows up late at my parents' house which annoys the heck out of me - but that's a whole other issue....

Mother's Day/Father's Day - In the past we split this up and we stayed with our respective families. This year my brother was graduating on Mother's day out of state so we spent the Sunday before with his mom, and the day of with mine at the graduation. For the dad's we had Brunch for one, Dinner for the other.

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

Every year, we have done:

Thanksgiving w/DH's fam
Christmas Eve brunch with DH's fam & dinner with mine
Christams: DH's fam comes to my fam's house

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

Christmas Eve my family

Now because of Andrew I will be hosting a brunch Christmas morning for my parent's and DH's parents.

Christmas dinner DH's family

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

I got VERY lucky! Christmas Eve is a huge deal in his family (not in my mine) - so we do Christmas Eve with his mom, and Christmas day with my family.

Thanksgiving - we do an early brunch with my parents and then a late dinner (hubby's side of the family does everything late) at BIL's.

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

Keep in mind we both have divorced parents making it 4 families

Thanksgiving= DH goes to his mom, i go to my grandparents (with dad)

Christmas eve= DH's moms and then DH's dads

Christmas= my dads, my moms

Easter= my moms

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

It is a mess!
Thanksgiving-my family (Dh's family always gets mad) So if they do this year he goes there alone.
Christmas Eve-DH's mom comes to our house for lunch, we got to my parents in the evening
Christmas Day-go to my parents house during the morning/early afternoon
Then to his dads

Always rushed, no one is ever happy.

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

We pretty much have a system down at this point, but even so, I always have a hard time not being with my family for a holiday.

Every year for Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, we alternate. One family gets Rosh Hashanah (2 days), and one gets Yom Kippur (1 day) and Thanksgiving. Hence, a Fast and a Feast!

Chanukah is thankfully 8 days, so we can see both families, but this year, we want to have everyone over for Chanukah and both mother's b-days, since they all overlap

For Passover, each family gets one seder. My parents get the first night, b/c my aunt, uncle and cousins come over, and we go to his aunt the second night

Mothers day and Fathers day usually are a pain, b/c we run between Long Island and Staten Island, or vice versa. This past year, we managed to get everyone to go to the Mets game for Fathers day, so that worked!

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

my parents live in florida and dh has a very small family. last yr his parents came to my aunt's house for thanksgiving. i cooked a hanukkah dinner for his parents and i think i'll be doing the same thing this yr. we see my sisters another day

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

OUrs arrangement is easy:

Christian holidays with mine. Jewish holidays with his. Thanksgiving, which ever is convenient to us at that time.

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

Thanksgiving I do at my house with both families

Christmas Eve is big in my family so I do it at my house

Christmas Day is with his family

NYE is at his sister's house
NYD is at my Aunts house

Mother & Fathers days are done at my house with both families

Palm Sunday is with my family

Easter is with his

Message edited 10/15/2006 12:03:41 PM.

Re: How do you divide up the holidays?

Passover - Easy. Two families. Two days. Two seders.

Mother's Day - We try to spend time with one of the families on that Saturday so we can be with the other on Sunday. Nobody gets picky on that one as long as attempts are made to accommodate.

Father's Day - Last year was our first FD without Dad. It was rough on all of us kids and Mom too. DH and I decided to have breakfast with Mom so she was not alone and then spend the rest of the day with his family.

Rosh Hashanah - See Passover. Replace "seder" with "dinner."

Yom Kippur - We have the dinner before the fast on our own. We do the "break fast" with both families at our place.

Thanksgiving - Alternates each year OR depending on where the dinners are being held, we have dinner at one home and dessert at the other.

Chanukah - 8 days. It works itself out.