Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

My DD goes to daycare 4 days a week bc I work from home 1 day. She absolutely loves it and so do we.

I am due with DD #2 in May.

We are considering putting DD #1 in daycare for 5 days (instead of 4) in May, June, July, August, when I am home on maternity leave with DD #2.

I have to have a csection this time and I am worried that I won't be able to dedicate as much time to DD #1 and also the lifting, entertaining, managing 2 kids after surgery.

I thought she would have more fun being in school. I feel so guilty, bc it will be Summer. Is this an awful idea?!

Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

Please don't feel guilty. It's not an awful idea at all. She's happy at daycare and you can focus on taking care of yourself, newborn, etc. I think it's a great idea!

Re: Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

I dont think its a bad idea...do what you have to do in order to survive with a newborn
But i would suggest if you put her in, do it before the newborn comes so she doesn't think it is punishment or related to the new baby. If you are due early may, i would put her in 5 days a week starting April. the new baby is adjustment enough; not having her mommy day may be hard too

Re: Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

Don't feel bad or guilty. I'm a sahm due with #3 in May. Dd1 will be in 1st grade. Dd2 will be prek. I'm putting her 3 full days. I figure at least she'll be doing something useful those 3 days instead of staring at me and a baby at home lol

Re: Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

Thanks Girls! I am going to talk to the Daycare today about the possible schedule change. I appreciate the encouraging feedback =)

Re: Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

Don't feel guilty. You need to do whatever works best for you and your family. DS1 was 3.5 and fairly independent when DS2 was born. He stayed in daycare 5 days per week for the first 3 weeks while I recovered from the c-section. Then, we dropped him down to 3 days per week. It worked well for us because I had alone time with DS2 and DS1 had structure. He was also old enough to understand that sometimes I needed to tend to his brother first. The days where I had both of them were definitely tiring even though DS1 is a pretty easy child.

If your daycare is flexible, play it by ear. You can always try a day or two with both of them home and see whether that works or whether it's too much.

Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

I am due with #2 in March/April. I am putting DD#1 in camp for 5 weeks 5 days a week from 9 to 2 because I think she will have a better time. We will not be able to do our usual fun summer activities, and I do not want her to be bored. I figure if there is a day there is something fun going on that I can bring the newborn to too, then I just won't send her to camp that day.

Do not feel guilty, she loves school and you will not be able to do much with a newborn.

Re: Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

Don't feel bad, most day area try to make it like a "summer camp." I know my daughter enjoys the water play and different vendors that come

Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

I would not feel guilty at all. She will have a great time at daycare.

Re: Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

I don't think she would even notice a switch from 4 to 5 days. Also, there's no rule saying you HAVE to send her every day you're registered for if you feel like you want to keep her home!

Re: Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

I agree with the others about putting her in at least a month before the baby is born, if you do want to do 5 days a week.

However...I had #2 last May. My older one was in day care 3 days a week at that time and we continued that throughout the summer. Yes, it's an adjustment to be home alone with two, but it was also an amazing summer. I got to do so much more with the older one (playgrounds, kiddie pools, etc) that I wouldn't have been able to do if he was in day care every day of the week. I'm actually already sad I won't get to do all those fun things with both kids next summer.

Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

I don't think you should feel bad about doing what you think is best. But I will say that I agree with the previous poster that my maternity leave with my 2nd was my favorite few months bc I got to spend so much time with my older one that I don't normally get to do with working. To be honest - when they are newborns they really don't require that much work (lots of bottles but lots of naps too). I was able to spend a lot of quailty time with my older one too. It was also my 2nd csection.

Message edited 12/29/2015 9:10:52 AM.

Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

Not at all - when dd was born DS went to daycare 5x a week still. He would have gone stir crazy being home and I had my bonding time with dd. I don't regret it at all.

Re: Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

Don't feel guility at all - She won't even know she's going an extra day.

I didn't read if this was a matermity leave, or if you're a SAHM - If it's a leave,
I, personally would probably take a 4 - 6 weeks to acclimate to the baby, and then drop your older DD back down to 3 or 4 days a week so you can spend some time with her too before going back to work

Re: Is this a terrible idea? Mommy guilt

I send my DD to day care when I had #2, it gave me time to bond with him and also time to nap while he napped.