| Posted By |
Message |
MrsM84
LIF Adult
Member since 2/13 2352 total posts
Name:
|
Chronic Non-RSVP'ers?!?!
Has anyone successfully dealt with this issue or found a way to nip it in the butt? I guess DH's side of the family doesn't believe in RSVP'ing or is allergic to it or something because the majority of his family does not RSVP for events. We dealt with it for our wedding, my mom had to deal with it for my bridal shower and my baby shower and I'm again seeing it with DD's baptism. It's really pissing me off. I've heard of not RSVP'ing when you are declining/not attending (which is still messed up and rude), but in DH's family, it's apparently the opposite -- not RSVP'ing means to assume they're coming?!?! MIL jokingly (but seriously) said in a recent phone conversation, "Oh you didn't hear from X, Y, and Z? You should know by now that means they'll be there". Ugh! I can't imagine dealing with this long-term (birthday parties, etc.). How do you deal with this? Do you simply stop inviting certain people to events that require an RSVP? I refuse to hunt people down -- I already have enough to do! HELP!
Message edited 7/21/2015 12:29:17 PM.
|
Posted 7/21/15 12:28 PM  |
| |
|
Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
blu6385
Member since 5/08 8351 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Chronic Non-RSVP'ers?!?!
on the invite do your write out RSVP yes or no ... so it clear that you want them to RSVP?
if so and they still don't I would tell them at the next event that you need to RSVP because if I don't know if you are coming i wont be ordering enough food favors etc. if they still didn't listen i probably wouldn't invite them anymore!
|
| Posted 7/21/15 12:32 PM |
| |
|
MrsB612
LIF Adolescent
Member since 12/12 784 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Chronic Non-RSVP'ers?!?!
My husband’s family has a handful of people that do this every single time. Like you, we dealt with it for every single occasion. They didn’t only do this to us, but other people in the family as well. I wish I had some helpful advice but I always just suck it up and text them and say “Hey, haven’t heard back from you regarding XYZ.” 
DH’s cousin on the other hand was fed up and didn’t call/text them. They showed up at their daughter’s Christening and had no where to sit. They ended up having to sit at some random table. If that didn’t teach them a lesson IDK what would lol. I’m not ballsy enough to do that. 
|
| Posted 7/21/15 12:39 PM |
| |
|
schmora15
LIF Adult
Member since 9/08 2476 total posts
Name:
|
Chronic Non-RSVP'ers?!?!
I know a lot of people don't like them, but I've found online invitations such as paperless post or evites to help tremendously. I find the reminders that you can send extremely helpful.
|
| Posted 7/21/15 12:59 PM |
| |
|
YOLO13
LIF Adolescent
Member since 12/08 669 total posts
Name:
Unlisted
|
Chronic Non-RSVP'ers?!?!
Why not send an email saying "since I have not gotten an RSVP from you I will assume you could not make it. Sorry we won't be seeing you"!
If they write back they are coming then say "oh great, glad you will be coming. In the future would you be able to let me know by the RSVP date so we have enough, food, seats and of course just in general know you are coming for headcount purposes? "
Maybe they will get the hint.
|
| Posted 7/21/15 1:06 PM |
| |
|
Millie3
LIF Adult
Member since 7/13 1280 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Chronic Non-RSVP'ers?!?!
We Only hear from DH's side if they are not coming.
|
| Posted 7/21/15 1:14 PM |
| |
|
jessnbrian
Only God knows His plan for us
Member since 4/13 7238 total posts
Name:
Jessica
|
Chronic Non-RSVP'ers?!?!
Yup, that's my father's side of the family.... they are TERRIBLE. I have to hunt them down. But, after a lifetime, I'm used to it. They are also chronically late, for our wedding, I put the ceremony time on our invitations as 1/2 hour earlier than it really was, to make sure they'd all be there on time.
|
| Posted 7/21/15 1:24 PM |
| |
|
BsMomma2014
Fly high little one
Member since 6/10 2662 total posts
Name:
nicole
|
Chronic Non-RSVP'ers?!?!
I hate this! It always happen! When I get an invite I respond ASAP I find it rude not to.
|
| Posted 7/21/15 1:33 PM |
| |
|
Blubtrflygrl
LIF Adolescent
Member since 5/15 609 total posts
Name:
allison
|
Re: Chronic Non-RSVP'ers?!?!
Do you have to invite them?
 :
honestly for things for DS especially I always keep it strictly to immediate family.
|
| Posted 7/21/15 1:41 PM |
| |
|
JDubs
different, not less
Member since 7/09 13160 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Chronic Non-RSVP'ers?!?!
Yes! People in my extended family never RSVP and I have to Facebook message my cousins asking if they're coming or I have to have my mom ask my aunts/uncles if they and their kids are coming. I am actually contemplating keeping dd's christening to just immediate family so I don't have to deal with it.
|
| Posted 7/21/15 3:22 PM |
| |
|
sunnyflies
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 1757 total posts
Name:
|
Chronic Non-RSVP'ers?!?!
It is extremely rude, especially if you are having to decide how much food to buy or how many people to tell the caterer you will be having. I over planned at a large party and was stuck with way too much food. It was very annoying, as well as expensive.
Unfortunately, too many people have very bad manners.
Few can match my SIL who was supposed to be DD's Godmother and who we all waited outside the church for until it was apparent she wasn't going to appear. That was fun. She told us later that she went to a dog show with her dog. Nice. She could have told us.
|
| Posted 7/21/15 3:44 PM |
| |
|
MrsM84
LIF Adult
Member since 2/13 2352 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Chronic Non-RSVP'ers?!?!
Posted by sunnyflies
Few can match my SIL who was supposed to be DD's Godmother and who we all waited outside the church for until it was apparent she wasn't going to appear. That was fun. She told us later that she went to a dog show with her dog. Nice. She could have told us.
OMG! This is horrible! WTF is wrong with people?!?!?
|
| Posted 7/21/15 5:09 PM |
| |
|
sunnyflies
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 1757 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Chronic Non-RSVP'ers?!?!
Standing there with my DD in her lovely christening gown and trying to make excuses to the priest was not fun. I ended up facing the reality that dear SIL was going to be a no show and asked my cousin if she would be our daughter's godmother. She graciously agreed and our daughter was baptized. At the party afterwards, she laughingly gave our DD her first taste of champagne, which was fun and helped lift our spirits. But, honestly, some people .... 
|
| Posted 7/21/15 5:49 PM |
| |
|
