stay at home mom comments

Hi ladies,

Just looking to see if any other SAH moms get the same type of questions and how you handle them.

My first born is 5 and in K now. I have another child who just turned 1 last month. Due to finances, and my other job, we decided it would be best for our family if I stayed home. We have no family or help around, so this seemed like the best choice for us. The mother of A boy my oldest went to nursery school with has asked me the same questions every time she sees me about if my youngest is in X daycare now. Almost as if I should be going back to work or something. I am not sure.

The daycare my oldest went to takes babies 10 months and up, but there are no openings. I don't really know her well, but she keeps asking me each time she sees me. It's kind of making me feel uncomfortable. Either she asks if my youngest is going to X daycare now, or she will ask if I am still planning to be home.

Maybe she is trying to make conversation, but I find it odd she asks the same thing every time she sees me. And I've been seeing her for the last 1YR I've been out of work! LOL I am trying to make friends, but I just don't get it?

Any suggestions on how to handle? What to say?

Thanks!!

Message edited 9/8/2014 1:07:20 PM.

Re: stay at home mom comments

I think she us trying to be friendly but doesn't know what to say lol. I would put an end to the questions by telling the t that you are staying home permanently (so she gets that is is not just for a couple months, who cares when/if you go back) and then lob a couple topics at her like how school is going for the kids. If she keeps asking and doesn't get the hint ask her how the working is going and if she plans on working still lol.

I am not a SAHM btw but still think it is weird

Re: stay at home mom comments

i can understand you being frustrated and its hard to gauge if shes asking just to make small talk or if shes being judgmental. i would hope it was just small talk. Next time she asks, i would just say "Oh, i didnt tell you I plan on staying home until LO goes to Kindergarten in 5 years."
Hopefully she will stop asking

Re: stay at home mom comments

Does she work FT? She may possibly be feeling you out to see if you are interested in babysitting?

I have a lot of SAHM friends who do pick/up drop off (and get paid, obviously) for some of their kids' classmates.

stay at home mom comments

What are you saying back? I would just nip it in the bud and say no he's not going to x daycare, I'm staying home with him and have no plans to place him in daycare and go back to work. This is just what we decided is best for our family.

Re: stay at home mom comments

Re: stay at home mom comments

Many moms ask SAHM's this question. I've noticed the moms not planning on going back to work, say things like I'm staying home with the kids until they are At Least, in middle school or Until the kids are much much older and can fend for themselves after school. I find those answers to be best to stop the questions.

Think People are just purely curious, don't take it personally! Just tell her we are not considering day care for him. The questions will end.

Re: stay at home mom comments

Thanks for the responses! I will definitely say something like that next time she asks me. :)

Re: stay at home mom comments

Sometimes I ask if a mom plans to go back to work or what she used to do before she stayed home. I would not ask the same question to the same person constantly. That is just weird. Work is not something I usually talk about when talking to other parents. We hang out with both stay at home moms, PT moms and FT moms.

Re: stay at home mom comments

She probably forgot...

I bet I do this all the time. We have a bunch of new neighbors: some who work, others who don't & I forget who is who.

I think the SAHM get defensive sometimes when I ask them if they are working. I don't care... I usually want to ask about busing or after care to those who are working to get ideas.

Re: stay at home mom comments

I wouldn't worry about it. Just say that you are not going back to work and have no plans to. I just tell people I am staying home indefinitely.