Feel defeated

So inwas talking with a friend about LO and how being in nutramigen has really hit the pocket. I planned on ebf-ing for atleast since months but that didnt hapoen. My friend was saying how expensive her baby was and she cant imagine the extra expense blah blah

Long story short apparently a few women overheard us and later talked about it. Basically saying i have no right to say a word and be a hypocrite. Women have had babies for thousands of years and other countries dont have "specialty" formula and people turn out just fine with no memory of what happened the first year of their life.

Im trying not to think about it but I guess it is all true. I was sad i couldnt ebf as long as i wanted to but was okay seeing the difference it made with LO. But now all i did was cry tonight. Am i bad for complaining about $$$ im choosing to spend? Am i making other hypocritical or elitist decisons?

Weight in please. I dont need fluff, if they are right pls tell me

Re: Feel defeated

Other people s#ck sometimes. They need to keep their mouths shut and MYOB. You need to do what is best for your DC and you are a great mommy. I know the feeling of not being able to nurse as long as you might want to, although I got to 6 months I really wanted to nurse DD for a year but I was unable to do so. It stinks, but a healthy baby and a healthy mommy are most important. No one gets any medals or monuments over the fact that they nursed, formula fed, or any combo of them. I am so sorry other people made you feel badly, but know you and your baby's doctor are doing the right thing for your DC. Mama. You are a great mom and I am sure your DC would say thank you. Just enjoy the snuggles and some skin to skin contact. It is good for both of you and sounds like it might be helpful the next time the baby wakes up for a feeding.

Re: Feel defeated

There's nothing wrong or hypocritical about spending the $$ to help your child feel better... I don't get why anyone would think that!! You're doing something great for your child & you shouldn't be made to feel bad about it! Also there's nothing wrong with complaining about how expensive a child is, it's the truth & admitting it doesn't mean you love the baby any less. Anyone who says that is wrong

Re: Feel defeated

They are wrong! Happy Mommy = Happy Baby!!! You made a decision that was right for you and your baby and you said you see an improvement so don't feel bad!! Also, that stuff is expensive!!! And the other country comment is insane bc we live in this country and why should a baby suffer if there is an alternative?

Feel defeated

I spent 60 dollars a week out of pocket for ready to feed nutramigen. Was it pricey? Heck yes. Insurance didn't cover it. But it was the only formula dd thrived on. I too was unable to breast feed. I pumped for a while and my supply sucked. I just said to myself I didn't care now much the formula was that she needed. I work full time and this is why I work. To care for my child with whatever she needs. Do not let anyone bring u down!!!

Re: Feel defeated

What is best for your baby is what works for you to be the best mommy you can be! People need to learn to shut it because they are not in your shoes.

A happy mama and a baby who has their needs met means that baby can trust you to make him feel safe and secure. That is THE building block for how he will handle the world the rest of his life. Why wouldn't you give your child all the tools they need to be the most well-adjusted they possibly can?! And if special formula is part of that equation, then it's part of that equation!

On a side note, if your child can only have something as broken down as nutramigen, nys law says that insurance has to cover it, as long as there is a diagnosis to justify it.

Re: Feel defeated

Feel defeated

So let me get this straight your dc who needs special formula should just get bf and made sick so those other mothers can feel good about themselves?? Why so they can be martyrs? And say ooo im such a good mom i ebf even though it made my dc sick! Do you know what you would do to your childs digestive tract if you kept giving them dairy???

I hate people! Your a great mommy! Doing what is best for your child! You keep doing it! And my dd is on alimentum and i complain all the tine how expensive it is! So what?! You dont like it dont listen. Dont let someone elses miserable life make you feel less than!

Feel defeated

F#ck 'em.

You do what's best for your baby. End of story. Don't waste your energy feeling bad.

Re: Feel defeated

Re: Feel defeated

Everyone has opinions on parenting, even people who aren't parents. And everyone seems to think they know best. And the bottom line is, they don't know you, they don't know your baby, and they absolutely don't know what is best for you and your baby. Comments like that upset me too. It's so hard not to take it personally. But just remind yourself that they don't know what the hell they're talking about and YOU are the mommy. Buying expensive formula so that your LO can be happy and healthy IS a sacrifice you are making for DC. Don't let anyone make you feel bad for that. You are doing what you know is best.

Feel defeated

People seem to have opinions on everything - this one is ludicrous.

Just as an aside - have you contacted your insurance? Some insurances will cover alimentum if for a medical reason - for ours, it ends up being about the same price as a regular priced formula. It helps!

Re: Feel defeated

Re: Feel defeated

You are doing what's right for you. Being a mommy, you will always put your child first and you kind of have to get a thick skin about what other parents will think about you. Your child, your decisions.

DS is on Nutramigen, too, and he became a different baby once I put him on it. Yes, BFing would have been cheaper but that wasn't in the cards for us. I saw my happy baby and knew that I made the right decision for us. You have to get there for you, too.

Nutramigen also wasn't covered by my insurance. Just an FYI - we order cases on Amazon and it works out to be about $.01/ounce more expensive than regular formula. So yes, it's more expensive than BFing but Nutramigen isn't much more expensive than Infant Enfamil.

Re: Feel defeated

People are a$$holes - women, in groups, are sadly, sometime even worse than normal a$$hole add some know it all "I'm so amazing" OR "I'm so insecure" mothers in there .......recipe for MISERY

Here is a little insider tip I've learned in the last 4+ years of being a mother - EVERYONE, and I mean EVERYONE has an opinion about your parenting, your child, your home, job, marraige, finances, spending habits and everything in between - Some are good, some are bad, some are expressed and some are kept to themselves - but EVERYONE has an opinion about you -

As mothers, we ALL do what WE think is best for our kids and our families.

I honestly don't see how ******** about the price of your child's formula is hypocritacal or elitist .........I think every single one of us who has a child has at one time or another commented on how expeisnve they are!!! Whatever that money is being spent on, formula, diapers, clothing, toys, parties - whatever it is ........whatever someone else may think is unnecessary or extravegant (and there are PLENTY of those opinios to go around too) You just have to shut it out - there's no other way to survive it.
You have to stick with your knowledge that you are making a choice based on your life, your circumstances, your kid - and you don't owe ANYONE an explanation or justification for your choices.

Stepping down from my podium now, Thank you