Any recommendations on how to deal with a 5 yr old who is demanding/bossy/etc

DS is 5 and acts like he is 13.

I ask/tell him to do something like pur his sneakers away, bring in his backpack from the car, or something of that sort. His response is "Why do I have to do everything!?!?"

DH & I repeatedly remind him of things he isn't allowed to do: run in the house, jump on the couch, etc but he does them anyway and right in front of us. When asked why he does it knowing he isn't supposed to, he shrugs his shoulders.

He talks VERY rudely to me- "mommy get me this" " mommy do this", etc. I do make him ask correctly for things before I will get/do.

He gets whiney when he doesn't get his way.

We have tried time out & punishment but it backfires on us. Either 1- he screams/cries/throws things or 2- MIL (who we live with) says "why are you crying?" & coddles him (even after DH has told her he was bad).

We are both at our wits ends. I know itll change as we'll be moving out w/i the next month.

But any suggestions on what we can do now? I work FT and only get ~3 hrs a night with DS, but the weekends I'm finding myself ready to go back to work Monday b/c of DS' antics & attitude

TIA

Re: Any recommendations on how to deal with a 5 yr old who is demanding/bossy/etc

You just described my DS. I find that trying to rationalize with him is at least "somewhat" effective. I ask him who he thinks he is talking to me like that? Does e alk to his teachers like that? I remind him of all the nice things I do for him and that he needs to treat me with respect. I also tell him that he hurts my feelings when he acts like that. I find that guilting him a little makes him at least stop and think. It doesn't always work, but I try to make him realize that his actions have consequences and if he continues being bossy that one is going to want to be his friend.

Re: Any recommendations on how to deal with a 5 yr old who is demanding/bossy/etc

I dn't have any advice, but I just tried writing my own post about this exact topic, and so I wanted to just let you know that you are not alone! I didn't have the energy to try to explain myself and I gave up, so thank you for posting this!

My DS is 4 and sooo snooty and cranky. If I ask him to stop doing somethign, he just keeps doing it, etc. He throws a fit if he doesn't get his way or if he loses something (like tv time) for not listening.

Every day....all day long.....he is not the happy, polite, easy going chidl he used to be. I feel like I am doing something wrong.

Re: Any recommendations on how to deal with a 5 yr old who is demanding/bossy/etc

Have you read the book 1, 2, 3 Magic? I have found it very helpful , it addresses these issues.

Re: Any recommendations on how to deal with a 5 yr old who is demanding/bossy/etc

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Message edited 7/31/2012 2:56:57 PM.

Re: Any recommendations on how to deal with a 5 yr old who is demanding/bossy/etc

You just described my soon-to-be 5 year old to a T. I ignore some of it but put a quick end to the disrespectful tone or talking back. I work FT also and have limited time with him each night. There have been several nights that he spends most of it on time out because his behavior is so bad.

I do think some of it is the age. They're exposed to more people and testing out new behaviors.

Any recommendations on how to deal with a 5 yr old who is demanding/bossy/etc

Wanted to throw out a book rec-- How to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk. SO helpful!