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Diane
Hope is Contagious....catch it
Member since 5/05 30683 total posts
Name:
D
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anyone have regrets???
So we soldour house. Our mortgage would have neen paid off in 4a more years. We lived more than comfortably. We are in contract eith another house. It is beautiful. My dream home. If anyone followed my short sale story. It is another short sale. 2 houses down from the other one we lost. It is more nice and the the homeowners offered to sell to us. So just waiting bank approval.the closer we get, my dh and i arw fighting. He keeps saying i pushed for moving because he wanted a bigger boat. He has onealready.
Hekeeps saying. I have to work for 30the more years to pay off tjis much bigger motgage. Im so sad. I do love our current house. Sometimes i wish we never signed the contract
i dont want to fight about money already.
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Posted 4/15/12 9:51 AM  |
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jana
LIF Adult
Member since 3/06 1134 total posts
Name:
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Re: anyone have regrets???
This would be a stressful time for any marriage, not just yours. You're not alone.
Just think how happy YOU'LL be in a few months once its over & you're in your new home.
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| Posted 4/15/12 10:42 AM |
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Re: anyone have regrets???
I think change is hard and stressful, even when it's a good change. You should try to focus on the reasons that both you and DH thought you should move in the first place. E.g., - were you outgrowing your house? Maybe it would have been paid off in a few years, but would not have worked for you at that point.
If you have a reputable mortgage lender, then you are financially able to carry your new home that you are trying to purchase, even if it is a more expensive home.
And if you are waiting for bank approval, this is far from a sure thing yet. So if for some reason this purchase does not go through, you and DH will have the opportunity to re-evaluate, get on the same page, etc. But in the meantime, focus on all the positives that drew you to this home in the first place and don't dwell on the home you sold. You are moving forward, and that's usually a good thing!
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| Posted 4/15/12 11:55 AM |
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Babymakin
LIF Adult
Member since 12/10 920 total posts
Name:
Sarah
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Re: anyone have regrets???
Posted by jana
This would be a stressful time for any marriage, not just yours. You're not alone.
Just think how happy YOU'LL be in a few months once its over & you're in your new home.
Jana, with all due respect and I MEAn that.
The problem is THEY are not happy. He isn't and she isn't. If SHE is happy he still WON'T be.
I think she needs to take her husbands feelings into consideration so they are BOTH happy.
For the OP. I'm sorry your fighting with DH. No one wants that. The fact is the house is whe you spend your most time. The whole family gets the benefit of the house. Yes, you all might enjoy the boat, but it's a toy, not a necessity. I say have a real heart to heart with you DH. Let him know it's not about the boat, but the family.
Good luck.
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| Posted 4/15/12 12:19 PM |
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jana
LIF Adult
Member since 3/06 1134 total posts
Name:
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Re: anyone have regrets???
Babymakin~
You're soooo right, by no means did I want to come across like that. Its not a You thing, He thing.. its a family,"they" thing.
I just wanted to offer a hug & support because even though the larger home is the goal, the road leading up to it can be rough.
I too am between 2 homes now & find myself fighting with my DH more than usual because we have no control or stability. I wanted a larger home, he wanted more property. Well we got it along with endless construction & headache. Meanwhile I came from a new construction home. There are days we both blame each other & say "this is not even worth it". I console myself by saying & thinking it will all be worth it in the end.
Its crucial to step back & have a heart to heart with DH to make sure you're both on the same page.
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| Posted 4/16/12 12:42 AM |
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CSK
LIF Adolescent
Member since 9/11 892 total posts
Name:
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Re: anyone have regrets???
when taking on bigger stressful commitments people tend to fight.
Not sure if this is an appropriate question, you don't need to answer but....
if you were 4 years away from paying off your old house, I'm assuming you've been paying for 26 years..... why are you taking a 30 year mortgage?
assuming you were 20 (which is young) when you bought your first house, that would put you at 76 by the time you pay off the next one.
if it were me, I wouldn't be taking out a mortgage that has any payments during retirement. I would be looking into 15 year mortgages. Assuming you're taking the proceeds from an almost paid off house, I'm assuming you have a significant portion put down on the new one.
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| Posted 4/16/12 9:25 AM |
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ave1024
I Took The Wrong Road
Member since 12/07 6153 total posts
Name:
That Led To The Wrong Tendencies
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Re: anyone have regrets???
This wouldn't bother me in the least and i'll tell you why.
Lets say you had a 200k house paid off with no mortgage. You are technically 200k in the black with your net worth on this house.
If you then decide to purchase a 500k house and put that 200k in a downpayment yes you have a 300k mortgage. But you still have 200k in equity on the house so financially speaking you are in the same boat.
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| Posted 4/16/12 10:04 AM |
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Diane
Hope is Contagious....catch it
Member since 5/05 30683 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: anyone have regrets???
Posted by CSK
when taking on bigger stressful commitments people tend to fight.
Not sure if this is an appropriate question, you don't need to answer but....
if you were 4 years away from paying off your old house, I'm assuming you've been paying for 26 years..... why are you taking a 30 year mortgage?
assuming you were 20 (which is young) when you bought your first house, that would put you at 76 by the time you pay off the next one.
if it were me, I wouldn't be taking out a mortgage that has any payments during retirement. I would be looking into 15 year mortgages. Assuming you're taking the proceeds from an almost paid off house, I'm assuming you have a significant portion put down on the new one.
DH bought his house over 10 years ago. a year agter we got married, we refinanced to a 15 year mortgage. We have been married for 11 years, so in four years this house would have been paid off.
we are putting a good amount on thye new house. We looked into payments for 15 year nd 20 year mortgages, and it was a lot higher payments each month.
Message edited 4/16/2012 12:16:45 PM.
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| Posted 4/16/12 12:15 PM |
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