Just wondering...

We are going to do IVF next month. I have been very stressed/sad about the whole thing. I have finally been at peace with it and really accepted this is our only chance.

All of a sudden I just felt so sad. It just hit me again what we are going through. I have been trying not to even think about it but I was just overcome by sadness and felt like I could not breathe. In the job I am in I deal with a lot of pregnancies (I do FMLA at my job) and I got two calls about spouses having their baby and I just got so sad.

Has this happened to anyone else?

Re: Just wondering...

I found the whole process to be a rollercoaster of emotions - sadness, anxiety, overwhelmed, etc. It is a huge deal to have to accept that you are not able to concieve naturally like most people do. It takes time to get to that acceptance stage and even when you think you are there, something hits you out of the blue; we are only human afterall. Give yourself a break and realize that you are not alone in these feelings. The good news is that these medical advances do exist and we are able to get to the final destination, by taking the road less traveled.
Good luck and wishing it is a short road for you and soon you may be processing your own paperwork

Re: Just wondering...

I too feel a profound sadness and hopelessness after 3 rounds, and a miscarriage in July. I am schedule for our FET tomorrow and DH and I just feel hopeless.

this journey is the hardest thing of our lives, I know we are all trying to hang in there and not lose faith.

Baby Dust

Re: Just wondering...

Absolutely! i felt that same way more times than i can count. especially when you hear about people getting pregnant their first or second month trying. what i always try to think about is the fact that even though it is taking us a long time to get pregnant, we are finally taking the steps to make it happen with the best odds. once you are able to accept that this is what you need to do right now, you will feel more positive about the whole thing. good luck!

Re: Just wondering...

unfortunately, this is how i feel all the time. up and down and very down but it shall pass and you will have a baby in your arms! try to think about the light at the end of this long tunnel.

Re: Just wondering...

YES. YES. and YES.

When DH asks how i am doing i always respond "scared and sad" those are just my default emotions now. I feel like I am constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop. I am always waiting for something to go wrong. This week i was waiting to see if I was going to O, then when i saw the follies, i was scared my lining wasn't going to grow, i held my breath and lost sleep over this, now im scared my embies wont survive the thaw next week. After that, i will be holding my breath for my BETA. It is a never ending cycle, and quite frankly, EXHAUSTING. big hugs to you!

Re: Just wondering...

From a BTDT ( 3 timer ), once you have that baby in your arms - how they got there matters not ONE BIT !

It's all very "in the now" currently but after your BFP comes, little by little all those memories fade to grey and I mean that from the bottom of my heart...Do you forget? Of-course not....but you have many new memories to replace the painful dark ones and they become your new "now"


Lots and lots of to all of you !!

Re: Just wondering...

Thanks everyone! Sometimes my job is my number one enemy. So many babies being born and people so happy and I just want that. Today someone brought their 18 month old in and I had to walk away while everyone was playing with her. I was in fear someone would ask me AGAIN when was it my turn. I was just asked yesterday.