Feeling Sad

How is your DH handling everything? The reason I am asking is because my DH seems to get very distant every time we find out that I am not pregnant. He will say things like "We are obviously doing something wrong" or he will assign blame elsewhere instead of face up to the fact that we have a reproductive issue. I feel as if he won't allow himself to come to terms with it. Instead, I feel as if he is in denial. He insists that I rushed into seeing a doctor (we've been trying to have a baby for a year and a half) or that the doctor doesn't know what she is doing....

Today he made a comment that he wants to stop trying to get PG cuz he can't take it when I get upset over not being PG and that he would rather be childless than have to keep going through IUI cycles.

I am going through so much in my life right now. My mother was treated for cancer several years ago and we just found out that the cancer is back. I have a very stressful job and on top of everything else, we are trying to get pregnant without much luck. I still haven't ruled out the possibility of being PG this month but I am feeling rather discouraged and pessimistic....

When it comes to DH, lately I feel as if I am going through our reproductive issues alone. He usually tries to be there for me but he doesn't always know how to be there and he feels as if he should always have the answer to all of our probelms. Then he makes comments that hurt me and make me even more upset....

Right now, I do not know what hurts more.... my mom's health, DH's lack of support or the fact that I may be facing a third failed IUI......

I just want to go crawl into a hole and stay there!

I truly feel like I am in this alone

*************************
UPDATE:

Several hours after I wrote this, I took a home test and got a BFP!!

DH & I had a really long talk about everything. He was blaming himself about our infertility but at the same time was also in denial about everything.

My mom's is staying so positive about her diagnosis. It's amazing how strong she is. I pray that everything will be alright.

Message edited 12/13/2009 11:13:26 AM.

Re: Feeling Sad

You are not alone. There are hundreds of thousands of women who are going through what you are going through... including your friends on this board!

I do understand the "DH situation." Our issue is male factor so it's been a very sore subject in our house. DH does not want ANYONE to know about our issues, including our parents. So I have been going through IVF without the support of my mom and best friends. It's hard.

I'm so sorry to hear about your mother. You have so much on your plate right now! Please think of the good things, like the fact that you do have a loving DH who does care about you. He is just being a guy... like my guy.

Stay positive!

Message edited 12/10/2009 12:51:41 PM.

Re: Feeling Sad

Thank you so much!

Everyone on this board has been so amazing and supportive.

The past few months have been a rollercoaster bt everything is really starting to look up now.

Re: Feeling Sad

Congrats on your BFP!! I am so happy for you. I know it's been hard for both of you. MY DH was having a hard time too when you get your BFP it's all worth it! Hoping everything is great!

Re: Feeling Sad

hang in there, and congrats on the BFP!