IVF For those who already have children

I had 3 failed IUI's and I will be having one more this month. I will be speaking to the dr in about two weeks to see what is next. I know he is going to tell me IVF. However I am concerned with having already a DS that is almost 2 and a half. Will it be a lot?? In terms of going to the dr even more, will it take time away from Ds, taking meds ( will they make me sick )?
What has been anyones experience with IVF and already having a child.
Thanks

Re: IVF For those who already have children

I have a son that will be 2 in January. The hardest part for me has been finding childcare so that I don't have to bring him with me to appts. I did have to bring him twice - once to our initial consult and once for bloodwork that was on very short notice due to a problem that arose. Anyway, I was "lucky" because our babysitter was let go from her 3 day a week job so she had a lot of availability.

The meds and/or the whole process has drained me physically and emotionally and I do think that my son can tell there is something up because he is extra cudly. But overall I don't think it's been too bad on him. And overall he will be so much better off if he has a sibling for the tiny bit of neglect he's had over the past 3 weeks! Really the hardest part is getting childcare if your husbands job is inflexible.

Re: IVF For those who already have children

DS was 6 months when I went through IVF for #2. My doctor's office doesn't mind children coming to his office. I would think childcare would be the biggest pain if you can't bring him along. Everything else was fine ... but I kinda take IVF in stride and really didn't get too worked up about it.

Good Luck!

Re: IVF For those who already have children

I'm not going to lie. It has been really difficult balancing work, doctors appointment, injections, and taking care of a toddler. I'm in the 2ww of my first IVF cycle. I made all of my monitoring appointments for first thing in the morning (6:45am) so DH was home with DC before we both have to leave for work. It was hard finding childcare for the retrieval and transfer. I stayed in bed for 2 days following the transfer. You can imagine how difficult that is with a toddler. I also have pretty severe pain from the PIO injections. I had one day that I couldn't move my entire right leg. I don't think this is the norm reaction to PIO though. Bottom line is it is going to be a lot of work, a lot of early mornings, a lot of missed time with your DC, but will all be worth it in the end.

Re: IVF For those who already have children

I don't have any children so I hope it's ok that I still answer. The actual IVF meds did not make me sick (I had headaches with lupron but tylenol always helped). For me, the PIO injections were/are the worst. The day after the shots, I am literally limping! It's so painful. I doubt I would be able to pick up a toddler if I had one.

But then I noticed that when DH massaged me for 3-4 minutes right after the injection, the pain was much less. Thank god. But it was still a bit sore.

There were always small kids in the waiting room at my IVF clinic. I think it's understandable to bring your child with you if you have no other arrangements.

I think it will be hard but absolutely manageable. I wish you and your family lots of luck and baby dust!

Re: IVF For those who already have children

It's been a challenge, but not as difficult as I anticipated. Since I'm fortunate that my RE has an office 3 miles from my house, going for morning monitoring hasn't been that bad. I just make sure I go pretty much as soon as they open so I can get home in time to either take DD to daycare (on days I work), or for DH to leave for work (on days I don't).

Since I'm doing a FET there aren't as many injections, we just do them after DD goes to bed at night. I'm tired and more run down than normal, but it's doeable and tolerable.

good luck!

Re: IVF For those who already have children

At the time, I had a 3 year old - it was definitely challenging, but DH stepped up to the plate, a LOT. I scheduled most of my appointments for early morning, before work, and DH would take Alex to school. Otherwise, if he couldn't, I would schedule my appointment for the morning, right after I dropped her off to school.

As for the emotional part of it - I don't know, in a way, having Alex actually helped me get through the process - she's always a distraction, and no matter what happened, or how bad my tush hurt from injections, one look at her gave me a tremendous amount of strength to get through it