Why/How do people get away with things like this?

Can't we imprison them, or make them go to tolerance classes or something? or just tact classes at least.

I was working with a really immature cast to begin with, but I didn't know how immature until the final week.

here are 2 incidents that happenned:

One person comes in and brings his boyfriend coffee, the boyfriend kisses him, and one of my cast members, not 2 feet away says "oh god. that's disgusting"

I was in shock. How do you even say that? Especially in front of people... good god. And not for anything, but if he can't tolerate gay men, he won't make it far in theatre.

Incident #2:

One of the nights of my show, I hear one guy say "I u,,, have to go get something" and run out of the dressing room.., then another did the same thing. They came to me and told me that one of the cast members had said to another castmember, who is asian "Asians all look alike." And the person who said this is black and gay, so I'm assuming he knows something about being on the receving end of discrimination...although maybe he's lucky and he hasn;t..

WHO SAYS THESE THINGS?!?!!




When people make comments like that, how do you deal with it? And please give me some hope that most people aren't really like this?

These are all outside people, who do NOT reflect the sentiments of my theatre company in any way. Incidentally, one of the men who was really upset and left the room after the "asians" comment, was the one who made the comment about the gay men kissing.

Re: Why/How do people get away with things like this?

Yup people are stupid. No doubt.

While interviewing someone for an HR position, I asked "Give me an example of some of the people you worked with - people you would define as being difficult." She responded "Well, I work for a small Korean company...and they're difficult."
Yeah, I'm definitely going to hire you...

Re: Why/How do people get away with things like this?

Posted by nrthshgrl

Yup people are stupid. No doubt.

While interviewing someone for an HR position, I asked "Give me an example of some of the people you worked with - people you would define as being difficult." She responded "Well, I work for a small Korean company...and they're difficult."
Yeah, I'm definitely going to hire you...

Message edited 3/24/2006 4:06:53 PM.

Re: Why/How do people get away with things like this?

How old are these people?

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Re: Why/How do people get away with things like this?

sometimes people don't know what they are saying

they see it as harmless

it's like saying all irish people have tempers

Re: Why/How do people get away with things like this?

I don't really see how either of those comments could be viewed as harmless.

And I never said "All Irish people have tempers"

I think making slightly self deprecating jokes about your own culture is a little bit different. You can call me a hypocrite if you want, but I don't think it's even in the same ballpark.

If "Hempstead Barbie" isn't offensive, I don't see why "irish tempers" is offensive. I refer to my own "irish temper" all the time

Message edited 3/24/2006 4:16:54 PM.

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Re: Why/How do people get away with things like this?

I still don't think it's the same ballpark at all. I never said "disgusting irish people" or "irish people who all look alike." it wasn;t even meant to imply that all irish people have tempers...it was a reference to a common stereotype in a joking manner, not in a way that was intended to lend any creedence to it, which i think was plain to see.

and if the asian guy had said "oh you know how we asians all look alike" it would have been a completely different story

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Message edited 3/24/2006 4:23:48 PM.

Re: Why/How do people get away with things like this?

I'm sorry if it offended you. I wish you would have brought it up a week ago if you were so offended.

Joking about a stereotype and being intolerant of 2 different things, IMO. If I were intolerant of irish people, I'd have to have SERIOUS therapy, because I am Irish!


ETA: And no one has explained to me why the LI Barbies are not offensive, but my comment was.

Message edited 3/24/2006 4:28:04 PM.

Re: Why/How do people get away with things like this?

i'm bringing it up because i think it is hypocritical on your part

look, we could go back and forth all day on this, i really don't have the time nor the energy.

Like I said, you can spin this any way you want to make your case and justify the fact that you are not as guilty of slants as everyone else is occasionally.

We won't get anywhere, so we can agree to disagree on this one.

Re: Why/How do people get away with things like this?

But I didn't even mean to imply that I believe all or most irish people do have tempers..that's the point you seem to be missing.

it's fine, we can agree to disagree, but I still can't even see why you would think the 2 comments are the same level. if you truly think they are, I'd like to know.

Re: Why/How do people get away with things like this?

well you are assuming #1, the person who made the "eww, that's disgusting comment" was refrencing gays in particular kissing, and not just Public Displays of Affection in general.
And #2, you are assuming the person who said "all asians look alike" said it in a serious mocking tone and didn't say it as a joke to people who thought they could take a joke.

And yet you can't see how your irish comment may have been miscontrued?

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Well that's the point. It was misconstrued.

And many people had kissed in front of this person, without the comment. Also, the asians comment was made completely seriously from what I had been told.

Re: Why/How do people get away with things like this?

look, there's really no point to me discussing this further

you're not going to see it the way I and quite a few others do, so there's really no sense to it

but, i will say, when you post comments bashing others for making judgemental racial comments, expect to get called on it

Re: Why/How do people get away with things like this?

Jenn,

If you remember, there was a thread about the different barbies and it WAS offensive to some, and it was TAKEN DOWN because of it.

I didn't personally find it offensive, because I do not live in Hempstead. But I was offended for the people that did take issue with it.