at a loss...

I just spoke with the nurse and got the results of my DH's SA and the results were not good (13.3 million concentration, 3% motility, .5-1 proggessive motility and 5% morphology). He has to go back for a retest next week so I am hoping this test just was a fluke.

Those with MF, how do you make you DH feel better about the whole situation. He is very upset and I just don't know what else to say to him, other than to reassure that we are doing the right thing and getting help we need. I feel slightly relieved that it might not be all me (I do have high sugar and start Metforim 3 weeks ago) but I am also upset but I would rather it be me than him. I just don't know what to say....

Re: at a loss...

Well, the good news is, if you do IVF, his MF is really irrelevant. You can just do ICSI and avoid it all.

Hope this helps

Re: at a loss...

We're dealing with MF too.
I feel bad for dh, but he feels worse for me, cause I have to go thru all the meds, injections, retrievals, etc.

Re: at a loss...

If it makes you feel any better, my DH's is a LOT worse than that And like someone else said you can do ICSI and just inject the sperm directly into the egg. But as far as the male ego goes, it's just a lot of reassurance and "we are doing this together" talks...

Re: at a loss...

Re: at a loss...

We have VERY similar numbers to yours. What you can tell your DH is that male factor is the easier infertility problem to treat becuase of ICSI. We were successful on our first IVF with ICSI. Now you know what you're dealing with so it will be better to go foward with a plan instead of wondering what the problem is.

Re: at a loss...

We have slight MF, in combo with my issues. I know what you mean about being a little "relieved" (and I use the word loosely) that is isn't all on you.

Just make sure DH knows that you are in this TOGETHER and they aren't your problems and his problems, they are "OUR" problems. DH and I both deal with a little misplaced guilt.

Just remind him how he isn't mad or disappointed in you because of your issues and you don't love him any less because of his issues. It is a much more sensitive thing with guys though.

We made light of DH's motility and ratio of dead:alive swimmers by referring to them as Datsuns and Ferraris. You just need to get the old broken-down Datsuns out off the road to make room for the $exy Ferraris. As long as you have one Ferrari to drive, you will be fine. My DH has taken on the nickname of Datsun (when we're alone) and we have learned to laugh about it. We have to.

Re: at a loss...

Thank you for your words of encourgement and stories. I really appreciate them so much. We are going to get him retested on Tuesday and then see what the next steps will be. I am still upset but I know there is nothing I can do about it for now.

Re: at a loss...

No experience, just wanted to give you hugs.

Re: at a loss...

it is hard, we're dealing with a minor MF as well and DH doesn't really like taklking about it at all. I feel bad, just be there for him and again, you're in this together. Best of luck to you.