I could have written this myself

A woman in waiting....

Emily A. Getz

Dear Lord, for two years I have been waiting, and again, the answer is "No." I do not understand why You will not allow me to conceive.

I look around me and I see teenagers with babies...friends who have tried for only one month and are now pregnant...women who "accidentally" got pregnant. Why is getting pregnant so easy for some women and so difficult for me?

I know it is unhealthy for me to compare, but today I need to complain. Will you listen? Must I remind You of my situation daily? What will it take?

I do not understand "Your will." Is it really best for me? I want Your will to include certain things for me. What about those faithful women who are patient and still childless? There are many things I do not understand. Lord, let me not make conception a mission and lose sight of the vision. Please protect me from bitterness, jealousy, and self-pity.

Where would I be without Scripture? Sometimes it is my only comfort. My husband tries to understand, but it's not the same for him. I have friends who hurt for me, but they have not experienced what I have. Thank You. Lord, for Your Word that soothes me.

Sometimes the emptiness and sorrow can be overwhelming. Thank You Lord, that every day is not as difficult as today. I know that You have picked me up more times than I even know. You are doing mighty things for me, even now as I write.

Please be patient with me, Oh Lord. You love me and don't want me to be in pain. Learning patience has been the hardest lesson I've ever had to learn. I fear that, if I haven't become pregnant yet, it may never happen.

I am trying to learn how to be content while I wait, Lord. I am trying to learn about trust. Loneliness cannot stay for long, for You lift my head and fill me with Your presence.

How will I respond if I conceive a child? Will I praise You as much as I think I will? Your gift would overwhelm me. Lord, please use my circumstances to glorify Yourself.

I know that there is but one guarantee. I know that You have promised to bless me.

Re: I could have written this myself

me too.

I often ask, what would be the reasoning of me not having a child? Am I suppose to struggle so that I could embrace Gods blessing when I do concieve. Was it so that I can restore my faith?

HOw many trials must one go through!

Although it has been difficult ttc, i am trying to remain positive and waiting for God's blessing.

Re: I could have written this myself

Me three. I cried reading this. I can't tell you how many times I have sat in church saying these same things over and over.

Re: I could have written this myself

It is comforting to see I am not ALONE on this one. I cant believe how much I can relate to this prayer. I cant stop feeling sad and scared that my prayer will never be answered. I am sure running out of time here. and $$$$

Re: I could have written this myself

So sad but true...

Re: I could have written this myself

Amen! IF certainly takes a toll on my faith. When I lost the one pregnancy I achieved in the last 2.5 years (it was ectopic), I was furious at Him. But, I really try to live believing that God has a plan for me and just isn't ready to let me in on it yet.

(Insert emote-icon with arms folded and foot tapping.)

Message edited 4/15/2008 9:55:36 PM.

Re: I could have written this myself

dilb712....
Thanks for sharing this prayer with everyone.

I know God will bless me but of course human nature I wonder if my desires are his will