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azoodie
Member since 8/05 8377 total posts
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Team SEXY BACK
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WR Again - How much would you give?
Hi everyone! We are going to Punta Cana for my cousins wedding in April. We are spending a lot of money to go to the wedding so I was wondering what people do in the case of destination weddings?
A little background on the couple - this is the second marriage for both of them. They are both over 40, he has kids from the first marriage. They already live together in a house they have bought.
I am at a loss for how much to give? 
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Posted 3/3/08 10:49 AM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
JenMarie
One day at a time
Member since 11/07 7397 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
Give what you can.
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| Posted 3/3/08 10:52 AM |
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headoverheels
s'il vous plaît
Member since 6/07 42079 total posts
Name:
LB
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
i would give what i could afford... the proper etiquette is really not to give less just b/c it's a destination wedding or a 2nd marriage, but if it were me, i'd be giving less than usual b/c money is so tight for me right now.
hope you have a great time!!
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| Posted 3/3/08 10:52 AM |
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EckoRed81504
We are complete <3
Member since 12/07 6299 total posts
Name:
April
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
Posted by Jennifer907
Give what you can.
ditto
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| Posted 3/3/08 10:52 AM |
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azoodie
Member since 8/05 8377 total posts
Name:
Team SEXY BACK
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
Posted by headoverheels
i would give what i could afford... the proper etiquette is really not to give less just b/c it's a destination wedding or a 2nd marriage, but if it were me, i'd be giving less than usual b/c money is so tight for me right now.
hope you have a great time!!
Really? I didn't know there was a difference in etiquette? That's good to know!
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| Posted 3/3/08 11:02 AM |
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bicosi
life is a carousel
Member since 7/07 14956 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
Being that it's a destination wedding, I'm assuming that their also honeymooning there? if so, how about giving them a gift cert. towards services at the resort? Beach side romantic dinner? moonlight horseback riding? day excursion? for honeymoon photos? massage? Just a few ideas.
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| Posted 3/3/08 11:04 AM |
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azoodie
Member since 8/05 8377 total posts
Name:
Team SEXY BACK
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
Posted by bicosi
Being that it's a destination wedding, I'm assuming that their also honeymooning there? if so, how about giving them a gift cert. towards services at the resort? Beach side romantic dinner? moonlight horseback riding? day excursion? for honeymoon photos? massage? Just a few ideas.
Oh I LOVE this idea!! I will ask her if they are honeymooning there  Thanks so much everyone! 
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| Posted 3/3/08 11:06 AM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
Posted by azoodie
Posted by bicosi
Being that it's a destination wedding, I'm assuming that their also honeymooning there? if so, how about giving them a gift cert. towards services at the resort? Beach side romantic dinner? moonlight horseback riding? day excursion? for honeymoon photos? massage? Just a few ideas.
Oh I LOVE this idea!! I will ask her if they are honeymooning there Thanks so much everyone!
this is a great idea.
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| Posted 3/3/08 11:16 AM |
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headoverheels
s'il vous plaît
Member since 6/07 42079 total posts
Name:
LB
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
Posted by azoodie
Posted by headoverheels
i would give what i could afford... the proper etiquette is really not to give less just b/c it's a destination wedding or a 2nd marriage, but if it were me, i'd be giving less than usual b/c money is so tight for me right now.
hope you have a great time!!
Really? I didn't know there was a difference in etiquette? That's good to know!
i probably worded it wrong - what i meant to say is that there is NO difference in etiquette and you should give the same you would normally give.
love the HM idea!!
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| Posted 3/3/08 12:18 PM |
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rojerono
Happiest.
Member since 8/06 13803 total posts
Name:
Jeannie
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
The only factor that would impact how much I give would be how close I am to the people getting married.
Message edited 3/3/2008 12:24:36 PM.
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| Posted 3/3/08 12:22 PM |
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Blu-ize
Plan B is Now Plan A
Member since 7/05 32475 total posts
Name:
Susan
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
Posted by bicosi
Being that it's a destination wedding, I'm assuming that their also honeymooning there? if so, how about giving them a gift cert. towards services at the resort? Beach side romantic dinner? moonlight horseback riding? day excursion? for honeymoon photos? massage? Just a few ideas.
love this idea..
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| Posted 3/3/08 12:24 PM |
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igottabeme
Its peanut butter jelly time!
Member since 1/08 2340 total posts
Name:
Wouldnt you like to know! ;)
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
Posted by Blu-ize
Posted by bicosi
Being that it's a destination wedding, I'm assuming that their also honeymooning there? if so, how about giving them a gift cert. towards services at the resort? Beach side romantic dinner? moonlight horseback riding? day excursion? for honeymoon photos? massage? Just a few ideas.
love this idea..
ditto and im sure they'd love it too!
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| Posted 3/3/08 12:26 PM |
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nferrandi
too excited for words
Member since 10/05 18538 total posts
Name:
Nicole
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
Posted by headoverheels
Posted by azoodie
Posted by headoverheels
i would give what i could afford... the proper etiquette is really not to give less just b/c it's a destination wedding or a 2nd marriage, but if it were me, i'd be giving less than usual b/c money is so tight for me right now.
hope you have a great time!!
Really? I didn't know there was a difference in etiquette? That's good to know!
i probably worded it wrong - what i meant to say is that there is NO difference in etiquette and you should give the same you would normally give.
love the HM idea!!
I totally disagree. I think if people expect you to shell out thousands of $$ simply to attend their wedding, then their expectations for a gift should be much lower, if existent at all. If you did not attend, then i would say to give what you would normally give for any wedding you weren't attending. Our friends had a destination wedding and they made it clear that they didn't expect any gifts. The understood the expense of being there and felt that our "presence was present enough."
ETS- However, I doi really like the idea of getting them a GC to use on their HM. I thikn that would be more than generous.
Message edited 3/3/2008 12:41:10 PM.
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| Posted 3/3/08 12:40 PM |
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LoveyQ
Stalkers, get a life.
Member since 11/07 12820 total posts
Name:
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
Posted by nferrandi
I totally disagree. I think if people expect you to shell out thousands of $$ simply to attend their wedding, then their expectations for a gift should be much lower, if existent at all. If you did not attend, then i would say to give what you would normally give for any wedding you weren't attending. Our friends had a destination wedding and they made it clear that they didn't expect any gifts. The understood the expense of being there and felt that our "presence was present enough."
ETS- However, I doi really like the idea of getting them a GC to use on their HM. I thikn that would be more than generous.
I agree with nferrandi on this one. When DH and I first got engaged, we contemplated the destination wedding option and the first thing we said was that we would not want any gifts if people came to the wedding - the trip out to the wedding would be gift enough! I don't get why people would expect to receive the same monetary gift at their $$ destination wedding as they would if the wedding were back home. For a couple to go out to a destination wedding I assume they'll be spending in the range of $1000-3000 or even more and the whole purpose of going is to be a part of the couple's wedding. That's a gift in itself. I'd say to give what you can, but it does not have to be the same as if it were a local wedding. If you can afford it, then that's wonderful, but I don't *think* the couple getting married should/would expect to receive the same, you know?
Message edited 3/3/2008 12:59:53 PM.
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| Posted 3/3/08 12:59 PM |
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ko123
My loves!
Member since 10/07 3002 total posts
Name:
Kristin
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
We're having a destination wedding in November, and although we aren't specifying "no gifts"...we really don't expect people to give what they would if we'd had it in NY. If people choose to give us a gift we will be completely grateful-but we aren't expecting...how could we? We're just so happy they are coming! 
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| Posted 3/3/08 1:13 PM |
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LoveyQ
Stalkers, get a life.
Member since 11/07 12820 total posts
Name:
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
Posted by ko123
We're having a destination wedding in November, and although we aren't specifying "no gifts"...we really don't expect people to give what they would if we'd had it in NY. If people choose to give us a gift we will be completely grateful-but we aren't expecting...how could we? We're just so happy they are coming!
This is exactly what I meant - no need to say "no gifts" but I just wouldn't see how a couple would expect the same gift from everyone. Congrats on your upcoming wedding!!!
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| Posted 3/3/08 1:20 PM |
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ko123
My loves!
Member since 10/07 3002 total posts
Name:
Kristin
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Re: WR Again - How much would you give?
Posted by MrsQ-in2007
Posted by ko123
We're having a destination wedding in November, and although we aren't specifying "no gifts"...we really don't expect people to give what they would if we'd had it in NY. If people choose to give us a gift we will be completely grateful-but we aren't expecting...how could we? We're just so happy they are coming!
This is exactly what I meant - no need to say "no gifts" but I just wouldn't see how a couple would expect the same gift from everyone. Congrats on your upcoming wedding!!!
Thank you!!!!!!!
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| Posted 3/3/08 1:22 PM |
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