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some advice

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starryeyes
Baby number 2 is on its way!

Member since 9/06

2020 total posts

Name:
Kristin

some advice

My bf and I just moved to Virginia. I like it here a lot. I do miss home terribly tho. We only plan on being here for 1 year, until he is done with this tech school that starts Sept 13.
The thing is, a week before we were to leave he started having second thoughts. He didnt know if this was the right carrer path for him or if it would be a waste of time and money. I thought it is a great oppurtunity and he should do it. Now we are here and he seems miserable. He is depressed, and we've only been here for 2 weeks. Should i wait it out with him, or suggest we pack up and go home?

Posted 8/22/07 1:32 PM
 
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sunflowerjesss
Mommy to 3!

Member since 10/05

20369 total posts

Name:
Jesss, duh.

Re: some advice

Seems like you guys made a pretty big move.

Maybe he is just nervous/homesick. I don't know if you should pack it up after being there only 2 weeks. I don't think that's giving the opportunity a fair shot.

Posted 8/22/07 1:33 PM
 

pinkandblue
Our family is complete, maybe

Member since 9/05

32436 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: some advice

I would try to wait it out, it is an adjustment period for you both, I hope it gets better Chat Icon

Posted 8/22/07 1:34 PM
 

CaMacho
Sisters :)

Member since 7/06

15112 total posts

Name:
Jess

Re: some advice

Posted by stephanief

I would try to wait it out, it is an adjustment period for you both, I hope it gets better Chat Icon



I agree, he should start school and then decide if it's for him or not. He might love it.

Posted 8/22/07 1:34 PM
 

starryeyes
Baby number 2 is on its way!

Member since 9/06

2020 total posts

Name:
Kristin

Re: some advice

I know, I'm just sad seeming him so sad. He misses NY. We both got jobs but dont start til after labor day so I'm hoping that working will help.

Posted 8/22/07 1:35 PM
 

starryeyes
Baby number 2 is on its way!

Member since 9/06

2020 total posts

Name:
Kristin

Re: some advice

I kind of feel like i forced him into this, because of selfish reasons. I think that by going to school he can get a better job and have a better life, for the both of us.

Posted 8/22/07 1:36 PM
 

mka06
LIF Adult

Member since 8/06

1079 total posts

Name:
Melis

Re: some advice

Posted by sunflowerjesss

Seems like you guys made a pretty big move.

Maybe he is just nervous/homesick. I don't know if you should pack it up after being there only 2 weeks. I don't think that's giving the opportunity a fair shot.



i agree... it takes time to get used to a new area and to a new job/school. I think after investing in the move, you should definitely give it a little more time and try to make it work.

What part of VA are you in? I am in the DC area (work in DC, live in MD). If you are also in the DC area and want advice on places to go, restaurants, bars, etc... FM me.

Posted 8/22/07 1:36 PM
 

starryeyes
Baby number 2 is on its way!

Member since 9/06

2020 total posts

Name:
Kristin

Re: some advice

We're in Virginia Beach. There is plenty to do. ALthough we saved a lot to move here, I don't want to spend too much money until we both start working.

He just keeps saying, I miss Ny, I cant wait til this year is up, and we can go home.

I know if I was serious and said lets go now, he would, without hesitation.

Posted 8/22/07 1:40 PM
 

mka06
LIF Adult

Member since 8/06

1079 total posts

Name:
Melis

Re: some advice

Posted by starryeyes

We're in Virginia Beach. There is plenty to do. ALthough we saved a lot to move here, I don't want to spend too much money until we both start working.

He just keeps saying, I miss Ny, I cant wait til this year is up, and we can go home.

I know if I was serious and said lets go now, he would, without hesitation.



honestly - a year will fly by. i would make the most of the year and really enjoy the area and have fun! if you'll be moving back to ny anyway - it's not like you have to think of this as forever.

if he hates school and thinks he won't like the field, that is another thing...

truthfully, i'd love to be able to live somewhere else for a yr! but, unfortunately DH and i are both in careers right now where that is not an option.

Posted 8/22/07 1:47 PM
 

JessInCA
live laugh love

Member since 8/06

5082 total posts

Name:
Jess

Re: some advice

Encourage him to stick it out. It's only a year, so there's an end in sight - it's not like you guys have to stay there forever. And even if he eventually decides to change careers, education is never wasted. It's good for him to get the training and have more opportunities.

There's plenty in the Tidewater area that you can go and do for cheap or free, so make it an adventure - spend your time doing and seeing things that are unique to the area, that you two won't be able to do back in NY. Make some memories, so when it's all said & done, you can look back at the year and feel good about it instead of potentially regretting the "wasted time". It's normal to be homesick and second-guess yourself when making a big life decision, but chances are he'll start feeling better as time passes, and once his tech school has started he'll be busier and have more to focus on. This is just one of many challenges life will bring! Chat Icon

Posted 8/22/07 2:04 PM
 
 

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