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octoberbride
Big sister to be!

Member since 11/05 2174 total posts
Name:
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People touching your tummy
How do you diplomatically tell people you are not okay with this?
Certain family members are touching my stomach as soon as I walk in the door (and I am not even showing yet!). I'm sure some people might be more comfortable with this.....but I am just not. I sort of feel violated. Is that weird?
I mean, once I am further along and can feel the baby kicking - I am certainly going to tell people, especially close family "oh give me your hand - feel the baby kicking!!". But I am just not okay with people taking it upon themselves to touch me.
Any ideas??
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Posted 7/25/07 10:19 AM |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
cjik
Welcome 2010!
Member since 2/06 8879 total posts
Name:
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Re: People touching your tummy
Oh my gosh, I was wondering about this also. I'm sorry I have no advice for you, I'm having the same problem.
Some of the oddest people have done this actually, coworkers I barely know. I wouldn't mind if it is family member or close coworker, but it's odd when it's someone I'm not that friendly with!
One woman actually asked me after touching my belly, "How did this happen?" My reply, "The usual way!" Too funny! She has boundary issues though, so it didn't seem so odd from her.
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Posted 7/25/07 10:23 AM |
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ARIELSMOM
Love my Babes

Member since 8/05 5889 total posts
Name: MEREDITH
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Re: People touching your tummy
People are nuts at my job about touching my stomach. I get belly rubs all the time. I dont think anythign of it. As long as they dont try to rub my belly after the baby is born....
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Posted 7/25/07 10:25 AM |
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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19461 total posts
Name: L
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Re: People touching your tummy
I have the same problem. It is my MIL. I told my DH how much it bothered me and he said something. Since he said something it has gotten better. Now she just asks every few minutes if he is moving. At 38 weeks movements really slow down so I can say no. But if he is moving I will take her hand and put it on my belly. It gives me some control. I really don't like it when people touch my belly either.
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Posted 7/25/07 10:28 AM |
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DancinBarefoot
06ers Rock!!

Member since 1/07 9537 total posts
Name: The One My Mother Gave Me ;-)
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Re: People touching your tummy
I threw diplomacy out the window. I hate people touching without asking, so I have made it clear in a variety of ways that I don't like it. I put my hands up, I back away, I get mad and say stuff like "you should ask first" or "what makes people think they have carte blanche to touch a woman just b/c she is PG" etc.
DH has told people I don't like it as well, so that helps.
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Posted 7/25/07 10:36 AM |
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octoberbride
Big sister to be!

Member since 11/05 2174 total posts
Name:
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Re: People touching your tummy
Posted by LSP2005
I have the same problem. It is my MIL. I told my DH how much it bothered me and he said something. Since he said something it has gotten better. Now she just asks every few minutes if he is moving. At 38 weeks movements really slow down so I can say no. But if he is moving I will take her hand and put it on my belly. It gives me some control. I really don't like it when people touch my belly either.
This is exactly who it is for me too! I know she is just excited and wants to touch "her grandbaby" as she says...but I just don't feel comfortable with it, and she needs to respect my boundaries. DH and I have been talking about it and I hope he will say something to her.
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Posted 7/25/07 10:38 AM |
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lululu
LIF Adult

Member since 7/05 9511 total posts
Name:
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Re: People touching your tummy
Only one person touched my belly so far and it was a little bothersome since i am barely showing. In the future i plan to back away if i see hands coming towards me! I hate being touched unexpectedly.
My mom has this annoying habit of lifting up my shirt to see how much i am showing - and this has happened in front of other people. Talk about rude!!!! She is lucky she is my mother or i think i might have hurt her!
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Posted 7/25/07 10:42 AM |
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octoberbride
Big sister to be!

Member since 11/05 2174 total posts
Name:
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Re: People touching your tummy
Posted by lululu
My mom has this annoying habit of lifting up my shirt to see how much i am showing - and this has happened in front of other people. Talk about rude!!!! She is lucky she is my mother or i think i might have hurt her!
OMG!!! I would HATE that!!!!
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Posted 7/25/07 10:44 AM |
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MichelleR
my Becks

Member since 5/05 1772 total posts
Name: tracyg
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Re: People touching your tummy
My SIL is the belly toucher,and I wasn't even showing yet. She talks to my belly too! I agree that once I get bigger and can feel her, I would tell people to feel it. But to touch and talk to my belly is really annoying at this point. But I just let it go.
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Posted 7/25/07 11:04 AM |
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