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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
That thread about the arrest is what made me post ! Because I had just gotten the letter a few days ago. Not that I think I would be arrested :)
The note says he was out 10 days. Which sounds really high to me. I don't recall him being out that much - although he was sick a few times and I know for sure I never sent him in when it was bad snow and I knew they'd do early dismissal.
But he's young and bright so I'm not worried. Just surprised.
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Posted 5/27/15 4:31 PM  |
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
As an educator, I don't think missing school is a very big deal. It's up the the child and their family to help them make-up missed work. Usually in elementary school, they don't miss too much. Maybe a math lesson, so as long as the parents teach them that skill they will be OK. I missed quite a few days in high school and never missed anything. I still graduated my honors classes with honors grades. I feel you have to put yourself first. I won't let DD stay home just to stay home, but if she is sick or we have something planned that we don't want to do another time- she will be missing school. It's that simple. There is a difference between 5-10 days of school missed throughout the school year and like 15+ days missed of school.
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| Posted 5/27/15 4:32 PM |
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Serendipity
Summer!
Member since 4/07 7631 total posts
Name:
PrayingWishingHopingALOT
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Posted by Hofstra26
All that being said, I don't really give a cr@p what anyone thinks about my decision to pull my DD. This nonsense of K, 1, 2 being SO much harder then when we were kids is SO overblown. Yes, it's different but speaking as a former elementary school teacher, it's NOT as crazy as everyone seems to think. It's NOT college, it's still just elementary school and it's not going to make or break any kid to miss a few days over the course of their educational career.
I value education, we put a great deal of emphasis on it in our home but at the same time, I also value family time, making memories, and giving my kids real-life learning experiences and I'll be the one to decide if I want to do that during school breaks or not. At the end of the day, as long as my kids are doing well in school, which my DD is without a doubt, it will be at MY discretion if and when they should miss school and I don't care what anyone else has to say about it. If the work is completed and they aren't behind then I see NO problem with it.
I couldn't agree with you more.
Also wanted to add- I didn't just pull my K daughter out. I spoke to the teacher and received all the work ahead of time. We completed most of it before we left- one thing she gave her was to write about her trip which we competed upon our return home and then the teacher also sent home with a friend some additional work that we completed once we got back. My daughter did it all and had it all done for her first day back to school
Lastly- I will agree- my feelings might eventually change once we get to middle school, or a testing year (I have a long way to go until then) but for now- I have ZERO problem that my almost 6 year old missed 5 days of school to go to Disney. They are only little once.
Message edited 5/27/2015 4:41:02 PM.
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| Posted 5/27/15 4:39 PM |
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gina409
TWINS!
Member since 12/09 27635 total posts
Name:
g
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Posted by Hofstra26
There are two schools of thought on this............those that think it's okay and those that don't AND nobody will convince anyone to change their stance on the matter. This argument comes up on here ALL the time.
Here's the reality. The kids who do great in school will do great whether they have 100% attendance OR whether they miss "X" number of days for a vacation, sickness, or whatever else. Those that struggle are going to struggle even if they have 100% attendance HOWEVER, missing school is a bigger deal for those kids so it probably is best to not pull a kid who needs a lot of help in school. I think we can all agree on that.
All that being said, I don't really give a cr@p what anyone thinks about my decision to pull my DD. This nonsense of K, 1, 2 being SO much harder then when we were kids is SO overblown. Yes, it's different but speaking as a former elementary school teacher, it's NOT as crazy as everyone seems to think. It's NOT college, it's still just elementary school and it's not going to make or break any kid to miss a few days over the course of their educational career.
I value education, we put a great deal of emphasis on it in our home but at the same time, I also value family time, making memories, and giving my kids real-life learning experiences and I'll be the one to decide if I want to do that during school breaks or not. At the end of the day, as long as my kids are doing well in school, which my DD is without a doubt, it will be at MY discretion if and when they should miss school and I don't care what anyone else has to say about it. If the work is completed and they aren't behind then I see NO problem with it.
I agree with this. If I ever make the decision to pull
My kid from school I would make sure they are not behind and have the work they missed with us
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| Posted 5/27/15 4:41 PM |
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sfp0701
Liam's Mommy!
Member since 1/07 9764 total posts
Name:
Tricia
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
A bunch. Two days for his uncles wedding in TX and the rest were real sick days. I never send a note. Is that bad? He is in K. Should I be sending a "please excuse Johnny" note even thought I call the answering service and say he will be sick?
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| Posted 5/27/15 5:09 PM |
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mbg1007
LIF Adult
Member since 3/09 1247 total posts
Name:
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Kindergarten is not mandated by law so not sure if you "need" a note but it may be a good idea so you get off on the right foot with the school where your child will be for the next few years
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| Posted 5/27/15 5:41 PM |
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itsbabytime
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 9644 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Posted by Hofstra26
There are two schools of thought on this............those that think it's okay and those that don't AND nobody will convince anyone to change their stance on the matter. This argument comes up on here ALL the time.
Here's the reality. The kids who do great in school will do great whether they have 100% attendance OR whether they miss "X" number of days for a vacation, sickness, or whatever else. Those that struggle are going to struggle even if they have 100% attendance HOWEVER, missing school is a bigger deal for those kids so it probably is best to not pull a kid who needs a lot of help in school. I think we can all agree on that.
All that being said, I don't really give a cr@p what anyone thinks about my decision to pull my DD. This nonsense of K, 1, 2 being SO much harder then when we were kids is SO overblown. Yes, it's different but speaking as a former elementary school teacher, it's NOT as crazy as everyone seems to think. It's NOT college, it's still just elementary school and it's not going to make or break any kid to miss a few days over the course of their educational career.
I value education, we put a great deal of emphasis on it in our home but at the same time, I also value family time, making memories, and giving my kids real-life learning experiences and I'll be the one to decide if I want to do that during school breaks or not. At the end of the day, as long as my kids are doing well in school, which my DD is without a doubt, it will be at MY discretion if and when they should miss school and I don't care what anyone else has to say about it. If the work is completed and they aren't behind then I see NO problem with it.
This exactly. I'm also glad someone finally posted about this! On these boards is the only place I ever hear how ridiculously hard K and 1st etc. is these days. I have a 2nd grader and agree totally what you wrote! It's all still pretty basic and easy for most kids...
For the OP I think DS missed about 10 days - honestly, I don't keep track. He misses when he is sick or when he seems like he is coming down with something or I've even kept him home if he is very tired. He missed two days for a family trip. 10 days out of the 180 (not sure if this is the right number at all) lol - is NOTHING. And, I can say, he could have probably missed double and been just fine.
Message edited 5/27/2015 8:45:50 PM.
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| Posted 5/27/15 8:44 PM |
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Lara&Aidansmommy
For mom i miss u ETC ILOVEU
Member since 3/07 13921 total posts
Name:
ETC I LOVE YOU
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
My dd missed i think 7 days. Shes only in pre k. That we pay for so they didnt say a word LOL
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| Posted 5/27/15 9:01 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Posted by Lara&Aidansmommy
My dd missed i think 7 days. Shes only in pre k. That we pay for so they didnt say a word LOL
Lol. This. They actually love when DD is absent because they get to keep my money whether she is there or not!
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| Posted 5/27/15 10:00 PM |
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Kindergarten - 4 days this year. 2 for stomach bug and 2 for a death in the family.
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| Posted 5/27/15 10:27 PM |
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WonderLady
LIF Infant
Member since 1/15 355 total posts
Name:
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How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Right now my kids are young and do well and I pull for vacations and fun. I don't give a crap what anyone thinks. Maybe as they get older and their course loads change or study habits/ abilities change, I will reevaluate and feel differently. I had shady attendance all my life and have a doctorate, lol.
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| Posted 5/27/15 10:52 PM |
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mnmsoinlove
Mommy to 2 sweet girls!
Member since 3/09 8585 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Posted by gina409
Posted by Hofstra26
There are two schools of thought on this............those that think it's okay and those that don't AND nobody will convince anyone to change their stance on the matter. This argument comes up on here ALL the time.
Here's the reality. The kids who do great in school will do great whether they have 100% attendance OR whether they miss "X" number of days for a vacation, sickness, or whatever else. Those that struggle are going to struggle even if they have 100% attendance HOWEVER, missing school is a bigger deal for those kids so it probably is best to not pull a kid who needs a lot of help in school. I think we can all agree on that.
All that being said, I don't really give a cr@p what anyone thinks about my decision to pull my DD. This nonsense of K, 1, 2 being SO much harder then when we were kids is SO overblown. Yes, it's different but speaking as a former elementary school teacher, it's NOT as crazy as everyone seems to think. It's NOT college, it's still just elementary school and it's not going to make or break any kid to miss a few days over the course of their educational career.
I value education, we put a great deal of emphasis on it in our home but at the same time, I also value family time, making memories, and giving my kids real-life learning experiences and I'll be the one to decide if I want to do that during school breaks or not. At the end of the day, as long as my kids are doing well in school, which my DD is without a doubt, it will be at MY discretion if and when they should miss school and I don't care what anyone else has to say about it. If the work is completed and they aren't behind then I see NO problem with it.
I agree with this. If I ever make the decision to pull
My kid from school I would make sure they are not behind and have the work they missed with us
I totally agree with all of this! I will be taking my dd out for Disney for 4 days. I don't care what anyone thinks. It's when my dh and parents can take off from work. Creating a family memory is just as important as any lesson she could learn in school on any given day. She can always make up missed work but we can't always all go away together.
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| Posted 5/27/15 11:25 PM |
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LIRascal
drama. daily.
Member since 3/11 7287 total posts
Name:
Michelle
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How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Sorry, but there is a big difference between elementary schools and High Schools. It in often understood that students in HS cannot be pulled for a vacation! From the point of view of the 3 HS teachers on this thread, it is an issue when there are excessive absences because many and most high schools have an attendance policy!
Why?
NYS requires a certain amount of "seat time" for each student in order to receive a HS diploma. You can't just not show up/cut class, get an 80 on every test and graduate (in most cases). In the district where I work, 16 or more absences in a course will deny you course credit and you have to repeat the course.
Exceptions: documented chronic illness/injury, hospitalization, immediate family member death and court hearings.
It's unfair to those students who get up every day and make their strongest efforts to go to class to have students who just don't want to wake up, go to class earn the same diploma. I've been on the attendance committee in 2 schools, and you would not believe some of the excuses people come up with to try and get their kids out of denied credit... The cat died, the alarms didn't go off, someone was stalking her online, she doesn't sleep because her dad snores too loud.........
Please. None of this is ever just poo-poo'ed and accepted. As a committee, we've never once thought this was ok. The previous posters weren't being harsh...just following the rules.
Also, if a HS student is medically documented to miss 5 or more consecutive days of school, they are required to receive home instruction for 2 hours per week per subject for every 5 days missed, at the school's discretion. So, if your HS child has surgery and misses 3 weeks total, they will send a teacher home for 2hrs/week for each subject so they're not denied credit. If the school determines that your mom just wrote you a sick note, you're entitled to nothing, and must make up your own work.
Again, speaking from the point of view of HS only.
Message edited 5/27/2015 11:59:18 PM.
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| Posted 5/27/15 11:56 PM |
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LizD
LIF Adolescent
Member since 4/06 763 total posts
Name:
Liz
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Everyone has to make their own decisions. We do not pull our DD out for vacations. She is going into 6t grade, and has missed a total of 5 days since she started school (all for illness), 1 day this year. A few of the years she had 0 days out, and she is very proud of that.
One of my thoughts is, is you pull a child out for vacation, then later in the year they get sick a few times, they can end up missing a lot of days. I also don't think it is a great example to set that it is OK to just miss school for a vacation. This carries over with them later in college and the workplace that it is ok to just stay home, call in sick, not go to class, etc. I can see the difference in the 40 and older set at work to the 20 something's at work. Totally different attitude regarding work and work ethic. A few have lost their jobs due to this attitude, and they did not get the why.
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| Posted 5/28/15 5:19 AM |
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chilltocam
LIF Adult
Member since 11/11 9141 total posts
Name:
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Posted by LizD
Everyone has to make their own decisions. We do not pull our DD out for vacations. She is going into 6t grade, and has missed a total of 5 days since she started school (all for illness), 1 day this year. A few of the years she had 0 days out, and she is very proud of that.
One of my thoughts is, is you pull a child out for vacation, then later in the year they get sick a few times, they can end up missing a lot of days. I also don't think it is a great example to set that it is OK to just miss school for a vacation. This carries over with them later in college and the workplace that it is ok to just stay home, call in sick, not go to class, etc. I can see the difference in the 40 and older set at work to the 20 something's at work. Totally different attitude regarding work and work ethic. A few have lost their jobs due to this attitude, and they did not get the why.
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| Posted 5/28/15 7:40 AM |
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Posted by LizD
One of my thoughts is, is you pull a child out for vacation, then later in the year they get sick a few times, they can end up missing a lot of days. I also don't think it is a great example to set that it is OK to just miss school for a vacation.
I agree on both points. One of my daughter's friends was pretty sick twice, both times missing a full week. They hadn't planned any vacations but if they'd pulled her for another week, not expecting her to be so sick, she would have missed a lot more. My daughter's pretty healthy but you never know.
I also don't want to set that example. DH is a professor so we can never go away when DD is off because then he's not off. So he'd be taking off from his job so we could go on a vacation which he's not supposed to do. I feel that they are never too young to have examples set, positive and negative. If it was a once in a lifetime type event, probably, but regularly, no.
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| Posted 5/28/15 7:40 AM |
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DiamondGirl
You are my I love you
Member since 7/09 18802 total posts
Name:
DiamondMama
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Posted by MrsProfessor
Posted by LizD
One of my thoughts is, is you pull a child out for vacation, then later in the year they get sick a few times, they can end up missing a lot of days. I also don't think it is a great example to set that it is OK to just miss school for a vacation.
I agree on both points. One of my daughter's friends was pretty sick twice, both times missing a full week. They hadn't planned any vacations but if they'd pulled her for another week, not expecting her to be so sick, she would have missed a lot more. My daughter's pretty healthy but you never know.
I also don't want to set that example. DH is a professor so we can never go away when DD is off because then he's not off. So he'd be taking off from his job so we could go on a vacation which he's not supposed to do. I feel that they are never too young to have examples set, positive and negative. If it was a once in a lifetime type event, probably, but regularly, no.
I agree with this. I never missed school as a child except when I was sick and plan to do the same with my own children. Education is at the top of the list on what is important and valuable, my children will know this and good attendance is a key component on understanding this.
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| Posted 5/28/15 7:58 AM |
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lilqtny
-Crossfit & pitbull addict
Member since 7/06 2830 total posts
Name:
Tracy
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How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Well this can be debated for days but the truth is that there are laws and kids can be denied credit as somebody else said. I forget the exact rule in regards to percentage but it is 18 days in most districts. So, if you do choose to pull kids for vacations and such you need to ensure they are not missing too many other days. However, if they are sick or have a cold it isn't fair to send them to school so you don't miss work. Because they spread the illness to other kids or teachers who then have to miss work. That's not fair.
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| Posted 5/28/15 8:38 AM |
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lilqtny
-Crossfit & pitbull addict
Member since 7/06 2830 total posts
Name:
Tracy
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How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
I also wanted to add that when my poor Aunt Lilian was sick (dying) with Cancer and her son was skipping school she still had to deal with legal ramifications of him being absent.
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| Posted 5/28/15 8:43 AM |
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steph7308
Mommy of 2!!!
Member since 5/08 2083 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
I got a letter after I think 12 absences which we're all cuz she was sick. I called the school and they said it's just so ur aware cuz some of the older kids might be cutting or whatever. I don't get how a kid in elementary school could cut but that's what they said and as u know lol our kids r in the same school
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| Posted 5/28/15 5:15 PM |
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summerBaby10
let's be nice
Member since 9/07 10208 total posts
Name:
Wifey
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
So many.. Prob around 15 & I'm not proud of it. DS is in part-time pre-k. We took him out for 5 days to go to Disney. The rest, he was sick but mostly because my parents weren't able to take him due to their Dr's apt, etc. I know this won't fly next year. I will prob never take him out for full week again but I may do 2-3 days for a little trip once a year.
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| Posted 5/28/15 6:28 PM |
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Posted by steph7308
I got a letter after I think 12 absences which we're all cuz she was sick. I called the school and they said it's just so ur aware cuz some of the older kids might be cutting or whatever. I don't get how a kid in elementary school could cut but that's what they said and as u know lol our kids r in the same school
Good to know :)
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| Posted 5/28/15 6:44 PM |
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jgl
Love my little boys!!!
Member since 8/07 7060 total posts
Name:
g
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Posted by Jugglemom
Posted by chilltocam
Posted by Jugglemom
My kids have been absent quite a bit. They've been sick a bunch and we took them out for vacation twice. They are in K and 2nd grade. Frankly, my kids are doing very well and these absences did not impede their learning in the slightest. My 2nd grader can do most of her work in her sleep.
Personally, even through high school I think it can be fine depending on the kid. If you have a kid who does exceptionally well at school I don't see why it's a problem. Also, I think if you have a senior who is doing well and it is the end of the year, all tests are done, college acceptances received then what is the big deal. I think sometimes teachers can be jerks too. I hate high horses.
Because now, many colleges will ask for a report of senior year grades as well, and can revoke an acceptance if there is a major change from Jr. to Sr. year
Yes, but we are talking missing a week at the end of a school year IF that child is a very good student. I highly doubt that missing 1 week for a good student would cause a significant deterioration of grades.
Fwiw when I was graduating high school, colleges also required you to submit end of year transcripts. Yes, if there was a significant change your admission may be reevaluated however, going from say an A to a B+ or even a B in your final trimester of high school generally does not warrant such a revocation.
I teach in NYC and my school our grades are already in, report cards done and classes assigned for next yr so feel free to take some of my kindergarten kids in vacAtion
Message edited 5/28/2015 6:52:01 PM.
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| Posted 5/28/15 6:50 PM |
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imyself
Member since 10/06 2938 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
I got a letter from the principal about my first grader being out too much. Yes I pulled him for vacation so we could spend time with my husbands family in Florida. It was the only time we could all get vacation time together. Then he was out for a "stomach virus" that truned out was really Celiac Disease. We spend a few more days out at the GI doctor and at the hospital getting testing. Then he ended up with a few high fevers. I'm talking almost 105. When I got the letter telling I needed to make for of an effort to get my son to not miss so much school and that I needed to focus more on his eduation I was pissed. My son hands in all missed work and has never gotten below a 90 on anything. I was going to call and talk to them but then it was explained my son is just a name on a spreadsheet stating he is out too much and that him being out can hurt the precious test scores. I have no intention of him taking the state tests so they can bite me. If he is sick I will and have kept him home even after I received the note.
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| Posted 5/28/15 11:02 PM |
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ElizaRags35
My 2 Girls
Member since 2/09 20494 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: How many times has your kid been absent this year ?
Posted by LizD
Everyone has to make their own decisions. We do not pull our DD out for vacations. She is going into 6t grade, and has missed a total of 5 days since she started school (all for illness), 1 day this year. A few of the years she had 0 days out, and she is very proud of that.
One of my thoughts is, is you pull a child out for vacation, then later in the year they get sick a few times, they can end up missing a lot of days. I also don't think it is a great example to set that it is OK to just miss school for a vacation. This carries over with them later in college and the workplace that it is ok to just stay home, call in sick, not go to class, etc. I can see the difference in the 40 and older set at work to the 20 something's at work. Totally different attitude regarding work and work ethic. A few have lost their jobs due to this attitude, and they did not get the why.
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| Posted 5/28/15 11:04 PM |
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