How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

My friend suffered a miscarriage last week and her boss is giving her a hard time about taking time off. It was an early miscarriage. She works shift work so her boss is working double shifts covering for my friend. The boss was asking if she was suffering physically or emotionally. For my friend, it is more emotional but is even more upset because her boss is pressuring her to come back to work.

How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

I took no time off. The day I had my mc, I was passing it all naturally, I worked the whole day, left less than an hour early, and was back at work the next day. I was a mess for weeks after, definitely was missing things at work, but it is what it is. I'm an office manager so I really didn't have much of a choice at the time. Also, I'm the type of person that needed to be at work for the distraction because otherwise I would have just wallowed at home and gotten more depressed. I also never told work that I had a mc, it just wasn't any of their business.

I'm so sorry your friend is going through this, it's NEVER easy under the best of circumstances.

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

I think it really depends on the individual..I don't think she should rush into work if she doesn't feel emotionally ready. I took 2 weeks off after I loss my twins at 21 weeks.

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

I don't think there's an exact time frame one needs. How long someone needs is a personal choice. I know it's a horrible and sad thing, but some people may need more time than others.
For work I probably would've never brought up a miscarriage bc that's her own business. If she has the personal time, sick time and/or vacation time then she can use that. Her boss cannot tell her to come back if she's using her own days.

I'm sorry for your friend's loss and I hope she takes the time she needs and will be pregnant again soon.

Message edited 9/22/2014 11:45:33 AM.

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

there is no right or wrong. your friend should be able to take as much time as she needs...but on the flip side, there are HR issues that come into play. i know every company is different, but for example at my company and you are out 3 or more days you need a doctors note. if you dont have one HR can get involved and your job is at jeopardy. for us, if you cant get a doctors note and want to take time as "vacation" you need your managers approval, and if your manager cant find coverage they do not need to approve your time off.

i hope your friend is able to take the time she needs to heal and her boss is more understanding. perhaps she can go back for a day to see if it helps...maybe it will take her mind off of it? and if not, she takes more time off?

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

well, from a personal standpoint- as much time as is needed. but from a business standpoint probably 2 weeks max.

How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

I say it depends if she needed a D&C. I had to have that & had lots of cramping after. I think I had 3 days off

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

I just took 1 day, but I personally found it most helpful to keep up my routine.

Everyone processes things differently. I didn't tell my job I had a m/c, I just took a sick day. I

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

So sorry for your friend's loss. I think it varies so much from person to person, there is no set appropriate time frame.
I naturally miscarried on a Friday night, so I had Saturday & Sunday to rest.
I think she should take as long as she needs. Sorry her boss is giving her a hard time.

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

Unfortunately, 'as much time as she needs' is not a practical answer when the question is about returning to a job that she needs. -
I'm not saying it's right, but it is what it is.

If she has vacation time, she should just let her boss know she needs to use it, and will be back next week or whenever, so he/she will get off of her back -

If she doesn't technically have time, and her management isn't willing to give her the time ......she will have to return back when they expect her.

Every person is differnt regarding what they feel they need. I didn't take any time -

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

I think it would depend upon how early of a loss it was. Natural, before six weeks, I would think two days would be reasonable. I am not saying that emotionally she will be or even should be healed from her loss, but to return to work, yes two days seems reasonable. If she needed any medical intervention then 4. Of course sometimes complications can arise and they might need to be handled on an as needed basis.

For a later term loss I could see an employee taking a week or two. For a full term loss even three weeks would be understandable.

I don't think emotionally she would be back to her old self for a while, but I do think if she has already taken a few days off then yes her boss is reasonable to want her to return to work.

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

I only took a half day but I work part-time so it allowed me some days to be home in between. I find the boss' question regarding whether its emotional or physical offensive! To me the pain was even worse emotionally but I felt I did need that half day physically too.

Also, I miscarried naturally but if I had a D and C I would have taken more time.

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

I am sorry for your friends loss. I have had three miscarriages. I took the day of the d&c off and returned to work the next day. I work from home but I was back at work the following day. I was a mess for weeks -still am but I had to work and working from home did make it easier on me. I would say a max of 2 weeks from a bosses standpoint.

How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

I didn't take any time off after my two. However, I was an emotional mess. Maybe going back to work will distract her? That's why I didn't want to stay home.

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

I had a D&C on a wed. and took the rest of the week off. I was emotionally a wreck and physically I was really really sore. I couldn't sit in a chair comfortably for a few days. Needed to be lying down.

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

Sorry about your friend. Had a miscarriage at 8 weeks. Took no time off. I worked from home day I had D&C was back to work next day.

How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

I only took an extra day off...

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

She has to do what's best for her. If she needs some time, she should take it whether it be vacation or sick time.

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

My last job offered their support and offered me a week of paid leave to "heal." I graciously took it and went back after the week was up...not to say that my head was in it but I was back to work in body. But it was done a case by case basis. There was a girl that miscarried in her 7th month. She didnt come back for three week and no one pressured to do come back any sooner.

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?

I had a D&C. I took off that day because of the anesthesia but I was fine to go to work the next day. I had a heavy flow a few days later but nothing that would prevent me from working.

IMO, it would depend on when the MC happened and how it happened. I was 6 weeks in an OR. If I was 15 weeks and natural, it may be a whole different ball game.

Re: How much time off work is appropriate after miscarriage?