Re: Advice needed (bridesmaid related)

I had both a local bachelorette party and a bachelorette party in Vegas. Not everyone went to Vegas but everyone went out in NYC.

You have limited time off and money. That is enough reason. Don't feel bad saying no.

Advice needed (bridesmaid related)

I'm sure she would 100% understand if you declined. If she didn't she's the b`itch, not you. That said, you can't fault people for wanting to celebrate how they want to celebrate. At the same time, when you choose to do something extravagant like a trip you can't expect people to make it. My bachelorette party was a trip and I did not expect one of my best friends who is a mother to come, let alone anyone for that matter. Those who wanted to join great, those who couldn't I totally understood. Didn't hold a grudge or judge them and I hope that they didn't judge me for wanting to go away. My friend who stayed home actually treated me for sushi and sake at a local place. That was super nice of her.

Re: Advice needed (bridesmaid related)

I would completely decline. That is way too much to ask for and too expensive even if you weren't in other weddings... This may sound like I'm being a downer, but with all the expenses of being in a wedding, the idea of big trips for bachelorette/bachelor parties is a bit too much. IMO an overnight to the Hamptons, NJ or AC is fine.

Re: Advice needed (bridesmaid related)

Posted by Hofstra26

My honest opinion, brides/grooms are out of hand with what they expect from their bridal parties and guests these days. They think that being a part of their "special day" means that there is NO limit to what people should be expected to spend. I'm honestly amazed at the things I hear about weddings these days.

That being said, I would NOT go and NOT feel bad. I think it is A LOT to ask of someone in terms of time and money. Also, like you, I really have VERY little interest in vacationing without my DH/kids. If I'm getting away on vacation I want to spend that time with them.

Bachelorette parties and weddings are just ridiculous these days.

Advice needed (bridesmaid related)

I laughed reading your post. Unreal. What happened to dinner and dancing? Decline, you don't need to even explain why!

Re: Advice needed (bridesmaid related)

I would politely decline and I guarentee you, you probably won't be the only one. That is A LOT to ask for a bachelorette party.

Re: Advice needed (bridesmaid related)

Thank you all - I spoke to the bride who responded "I didn't expect you to come" she also said that she doesn't expect another BM to come as she will have a newborn at that time....lucky enough my other brides just want good old fashion nights out in the city wearing lots of penis paraphernalia thanks for all the comments- i really just wanted to make sure i didn't become a crazy mom/married lady who thought this request was outlandish.

Re: Advice needed (bridesmaid related)

Not b*tchy at all. I was a bridesmaid & dh a groomsman in my brother and sil wedding. My sil had her bachelorette party in AC and my brother his bachlor party in OC. Neither dh and I attended. I was honest we were purchasing a home a money was tight plus it would burden my parents with watching my girls. Neither my brother or sil were upset.

I think you have to do what works for you and your family. Sure the bride would like all her bridesmaids there but a cruise is expensive. I would not feel the least bit guilty turning it down.

Re: Advice needed (bridesmaid related)

Not rude at all. I wouldn't go either.