Baby #2

How did you know it was time to have baby #2. My DS is 17 months so if we have another kid when we were thinking about trying he will be about 2 and a half.

I guess my questions are:

When did you know it was the right time?

Is it hard having kids that close in age? (pros/cons)

If you have kids that close in age share your experience.

TIA

Re: Baby #2

Well #2 wasnt planned lol.

Dd- 3 in September
ds- almost 3 months

Like 2 yrs 8m apart

Pros- close in age to grow up together, play,
cons- little hard because dd is difficult at times with sharing us

Overall i think no matter what u make it work. Good luck

Re: Baby #2

bump... thanks purple girl.

Re: Baby #2

I knew I wanted baby #2 right after my DS was born!! I did take BC pills for about 3 months & got off when my DS was 6 months. It's taking a lot longer than anticipated, my DS is now almost 20 months. We unfortunately just had a miscarriage 2 weeks ago, but plan to go ahead with ttc after my 1st cycle. You never know how long it can take, so if you are sure that you want #2, then go for it! The best of luck to you

Re: Baby #2

DD is 13 months and I am SO ready for #2. I think we are going to TTC next month. I think having 2 close in age is so much easier than having a big gap - you are still in the baby phase. Plus they will play together so well and be into similar things.

Baby #2

I am struggling with the same questions you are. My DD is 16 months and I know that I want her to have a sibling but I am just not ready to have another baby. I am still enjoying my time with her.

I do know that I want them close in age which means I would like her to have a sibling by the time she is 3. So that means we will most likely be TTC within the next year.

Re: Baby #2

There is a 7year gap between my first and second and only 19 months between my 2nd and 3rd.
Pros on big gap- you get to spend a lot of time with DC 1, you get to regroup from the baby phase, DC 1 is more independant.
Cons- Different phases of life with a 7 year gap.
Pros with close in age- they keep each other occupied and are best of friends
Cons with close in age- the beginning stages are rough, its harder in the beginning, dividing attention, exhaustion.

Re: Baby #2

Thanks!

Re: Baby #2

For me it was time because I was turning 35 (my magic number that meant have another baby or forever hold my peace)...

I wanted to get pregnant before my DD hit her terrible 2s and DH got scared off forever

I figured by the time #2 started day care, #1's day care rate would drop, therefor making it a cost we could manage.

We TTC when DD was 19 months, got pregnant when she was 21 months and with all the things that happened in our lives after that, it was 100% the right time.

Message edited 7/12/2012 7:24:55 PM.

Re: Baby #2

I always knew I wanted more than one child, and I knew I didnt want them TOO close in age (no desire to do 2 under 2). DS1 was a great baby and we really just enjoyed being a family of 3, going on little vacations, going to Disney, even DH and I taking vacations alone.
When DS was 18 months I was ready but DH wasnt. (he hates change!) Then one day I think it occured to him that a bunch of people we knew had kids aroudn the time DS was born and all of them had already had or were pregnant with #2. So he said maybe...I took that as a yes and we were pregnant a month later!

My kids are 3y3m apart and its WONDERFUL.
Pros: DS1 was very involoved in my pregnancy, he was super excited, it really felt like our FAMILY was going through this together. Even now 1y later he will tell everyone about how he "asked for a baby brother and God gave him one. He was born on a Tuesday"....etc
Also he was ready, he loved babies and wanted a baby./ There was no jealousy, no resentment. He was literally in love from the first meeting. And DS1 started preschool a few months later (DS2 was 5m) so it gave me some time with just my little baby while my big boy was off at school for 3h 3days a week. And now in Sept DS1 starts Kindergarten so it allows me the one on one time that I really cherished with DS1 those first 3years.

Cons: The only con I can say about our age gap is that right now they are in different places...DS1 likes video games and power rangers and DS2 likes blues clues and making a mess of whatever his brother is doing. But overall they play nice together (DS1 is 4.5yo, DS2 is almost 15m)

I love seeing them together, I love how they each light up when they havent seen each other all day. (DS1 spent a day at his cousins and when he came home I thought DS2 was going to faint he was so excited to see him) I love how DS1 even though he gets mad at his brother, protects him and tells me when he is doing something "dangerous"

Re: Baby #2

I think you should do it. Being the aunt to your amazing son, I want to spoil another nephew/or niece!! If you have a girl you have SO many things you can borrow (double of everything lol)

Re: Baby #2

Re: Baby #2

i got pregnant with DS when DD was 18 months old...it was a surprise and at first i was in shock and very nervous but they are 2 years and 2 months apart and i wouldnt have it any other way. i love the age gap between them...they are inseperable ....the only thing that was tough was the first 6 months after having DS both were in diapers, the expense and constant diaper changing was alot but i have no regrets and it was such a short time, DD was potty trained by 2 1/2. i was thinking of having another baby but DS is turning 5, i am on the fence about having another since its such a big age gap...i wish i would have had another when DS was 4 and DD was 6. hope this helps!

Re: Baby #2

#2 was not planned. I found out I was pg right after DD1's 1st birthday

They are 20 months apart and I don't find it very hard at all! They are both pretty easy going kids, so I'm lucky.

Re: Baby #2

#2 was a surprise (we were trying... but never expected her so early).

17 months apart & it's REALLY difficult. DS (DC#1) needs a LOT of attention, so even though DD (DC #2) is easy... it's tough on anyone who has to watch the 2 kids. We try to have 2 adults with them at all times.

Re: Baby #2

My girls are 2 years apart and it's adorable! (DD2 is only 9 weeks old). These first few months are completely exhausting and physically demanding on the parents, but I like that they will be able to do a lot of the same age appropriate things together sooner rather than later. DD1 is just obsessed and inlove with her little sister and I already see a lil bond forming. DD1 is at a great (although challenging) age and is very communicative so that helps. So far so good even in the midst of the terrible twos! : )

Message edited 7/13/2012 10:35:32 PM.

Baby #2

i want to wait til DD is 3 or 4 unless a miracle happens and i got knocked up (took IVF the first time around). in theory i would like to go back to work and make some money and pay off some more debt, and have DD be in a school-type program that i have time during the day to spend with the new baby before DD is home from school.

of course that is all in a perfect world . in reality i almost died giving birth to DD and DH isnt remotely ready to endure that again. most days i am ready to give it another shot but my greater concern is taking attention away from DD at this point. i know it will be hard any time, but i feel like once she is immersed in a school program and i'm not her main source of education and entertainment every day, it will be easier.

Re: Baby #2

For me I started getting baby fever when dd turned 6 months old. Than when she was 9 months I got pg we weren't ttc but we were thrilled. That pg ended in mc and than we started activitly ttc . I got pg when dd was 12 months old so my girls are 22 months apart. My second is only 6 weeks old so I'm really in the thick of having 2 under 2 right now. It really hard I won't even lie. I feel like I'm constatly waiting for dh to walk through the door so I can have an extra set of hands to help me out.

Pros
-like others have said you're still use to being in the baby phase
-they will grow up together
-for me they are the same gender so there is a lot of clothes to pass down
-Having them close together means a few rough years and than it will get better. I'm looking foward to when both girls becoming more independent and most of all friends.


Cons
-number 1 isn't truly independent
-the very active toddler and needy newborn is a hard mix. My days consist of trying to care for a newborn and chasing my toddler all over.
-the amount of baby gear in my house is insane!! DD one still needs a highchair, is in her crib, changing table, rf carseat and now add all the newborn items in our house is overloaded with gear. Not to mention the dreaded double stroller it sucks!

Re: Baby #2

DS is 14 months and we are planning on TTC # 2 starting in January 2014. IF we concieve right away DS and the baby will be 3 years 5 months apart. For us, that is the perfect spacing, because I would like DS to be in nursery school at least part time when the baby comes. Plus, I am starting to enjoy him so much now- he is his own little person and I love doing things with him that I know would be more difficult if we added a newborn into the mix. Plus, getting a babysitter is easy with one- between grandparents, aunts & uncles, and my best friend, someone is always willing to watch him so we get out 2-3x a month. I worry that with each passing month we won't ever want another one. But, I am ok with that possibility too.