Teach me about toddler tantrums

DS is almost 2 and is usually well-behaved. Lately, he's been having frequent tantrums, ignoring my simple requests (which I know he understands) and having random crying fits.

How do I deal best with him? Time outs?

Re: Teach me about toddler tantrums

I'm at a loss too! DD will be so good and then completely lose it over having to sit in her highchair (even if she just sat in it for breakfast).

It took me 10 minutes just to wrestle her into her carseat today. Ugh, it's so draining. I feel your pain.

Re: Teach me about toddler tantrums

dd is 20 months but I have been dealing with them since 12months. They are so hard to deal with.

If I am home she gets a time out. We have the pack and play set up b/c for a while there she would bang her head as her tantrum and that was safest now I put her in there when she screaming or having a tantrum.

She will throw a fit sometimes when going into the stroller but I don't care. she needs to go in so I put her in kicking and screaming and go. She gets over it fast.

I try to ignore them. Time out has been working for her and I explain it.

Also, I NEVER give in. I won't take her out of the stroller or give her what she wants, just because she wants it.

There have been plenty of times people staring at me b/c she is screaming. too bad.

Re: Teach me about toddler tantrums

I have found that being calm, consistent and ignoring the behavior to work best. When DD throws a tantrum I get down to her level, tell her that I'll talk to her when she calms down and walk away. If she's doing something that she is not supposed to be doing she gets one warning and then loses something that she wants. Finally, I reserve the "I'm counting to 3" method for behavior that needs to change immediately.

Re: Teach me about toddler tantrums

tantrums, i let them run their course. if we are home, i let him lay on the floor screaming and I just ignore it. once he has calmed down (usually on his own) we talk about it and i tell him how much i love him etc.

if he is acting out, i get on his level and hold his arms (so he cant run/turn away) and explain that what he is doing is not acceptable. i tell him there will be a consequence if he continues (warn him) and then follow through if he continues - time out, tv off, crayons taken away or whatever he is going at the time etc.

Re: Teach me about toddler tantrums

it depends..if his tantrum ends up in hitting me he goes right into time out.

other times i let him lay on the floor and cry and work it out and 5 min later he's fine and acts lke nothing happened.

i find that ignoring him while he's upset works well. (when we are home..he's usually pretty good when we are out and about...although i have carried him out of the mall screaming like a nut..lol.)

Re: Teach me about toddler tantrums

Keep you calm, don't let them see you get upset - its fuel to their fire.

I use/used time-outs. I also used a "good manners chart" which was just a bingo type piece of paper and when DS listened well or used good manners got a sticker.

Re: Teach me about toddler tantrums

If it's not a full blown tantrum... time out (not giving in!) and then talking about it, having to say sorry and give a hug & kiss has worked/still works for us.

If it's a tantrum that gets BAD quick, it usually just needs to run its course, there is no reasoning with her. So we just let her cry it out, roll around, etc until she calms down... totally ignoring her. Then once she's calm (and does a 180 into the sweetest child EVER ) we go over and ask her if she is OK now and explain whatever happened to cause it, etc.

Re: Teach me about toddler tantrums

I think toddlers have schizophrenia or are bi-polar.

Its either a test of our strength or payback from our parents. Somehow the cycle needs to stop.

Re: Teach me about toddler tantrums

My mom just pulled an article from WebMD magazine called 'Tantrum Tactics' but it was from June 2011. I searched for the article but can't find it but it was about using Dr. Karp's (Happiest Baby on the Block) Caveman approach.

Basically, you talk to your kid like a caveman.

“You want. You want. You want cookie. You say, ‘Cookie, now. Cookie now.’ ”


Link to NY Times article


If you search "Dr. Karp Caveman method" a bunch comes up.

Seemed interesting. I don't have a toddler yet but I can see glimpses of my future when DD gets upset even now at 11 months. I guess if nothing else is working, it wouldn't hurt to try it!

Re: Teach me about toddler tantrums

Posted by FreeButterfly

I think toddlers have schizophrenia or are bi-polar.

Its either a test of our strength or payback from our parents. Somehow the cycle needs to stop.