Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

I was at Savers today (the second-hand shop), and I saw some jeans that were Children's Place, in great condition, for $2. I picked up a few pairs and washed them.

DH is so upset I bought our DS used clothes. I think a lot of it stems from his childhood, but I never saw the big deal.

He doesn't want me to do this anymore........but for $2 a pair, compared to $20 a pair in the store, I think he's being silly.

Thoughts?

Message edited 1/10/2012 12:33:55 AM.

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

Other than special occasion clothing and gifts received - every single item that DD wears is second (or third) hand.

I don't see the problem? As long as you are washing them before wearing. . .

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

considering how fast they out grow those $20 pants..i dont see anything wrong with it either. my coworker has given me bags of stuff from her son; i have paid it forward to other moms.

i've bought a few items from consignment sales as well. if they are in good condition...why not?

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

We lucky to have DDs clothes passed down to us. Other than a special outfit here and there all of her clothes are used.

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

90% of DS's clothes were passed down from another Triplet mommy. But everyone has their thing.

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

Two of my dh's friends gave us a huge bag of clothes and every time we see them they have 1 to 3 outfits for us. I get so excited and we have received such great things, multiple pairs of never used nikes, jerseys, etc. even though they told me everything was washed I feel better washing it again and I have no issues with it.

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

Eh... you need to have this discussion with your DH.

Both DH and I had our childhood and teenage-hood clothes & even toys pretty much ALL donated. If not, they were REALLY cheap new items. Times were tough for our parents.

When they are slightly used (1 yr or 2 yrs old)... it's all good... but ours were maybe 5 yrs old/more & the styles changed.

Think going through awkward teen years in out-of fashion clothes... we were well aware that we were out of style & teased a LOT.

Maybe it's what your hubby went through too (I guess I'm projecting) & you could reach a compromise (ie. clothes up to a certain age).

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

If I knew where they came from I wouldn't care and have done it. My sister gives me all her dd's clothes. From friends I wouldn't care.

I personally would not buy second hand clothes. There's nothing wrong with it but I feel that I don't know where they have been . I don't really know my reasoning, I just don't feel comfortable buying used clothing.

But again, I know plenty of people that do and more power to them saving a bucket load of cash

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

My dh is exactly like yours, he would be very upset if I went to a second hand store. Personally I agree with your dh.

The only hand me downs we received are from my twin nephews

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

It does not bother me to get something passed on from a friend's DC to mine. I think I have only purchased a handful of PJs for DD. I have no problem with having her wear something in excellent condition. I give my son's clothing to the same friends that share their DDs clothing with me. DD has received some really high end clothing that I would otherwise never have gotten her. Lilly Pulitzer, Uggs (brand new - their DC wore for 45 minutes and then said they don't fit, otherwise I would not have taken used shoes), and some private label line clothing. With that said, I love the thrill of bargain hunting so I get brand new clothing for as little as possible. I shop the end of season for next year. My average price for Gymboree jeans is $9 and gap jeans are $12. I don't like how CP jeans fit my kids but last week you could have purchased them for $4 for brand new clothing. ETA: I would not purchase clothing from a second hand store but I see nothing wrong with it.

Message edited 1/10/2012 8:58:17 AM.

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

i dont see the big deal. Honeslty i think spending tons of money on clothes for babies and young kids that they are going to grow out of so quickly is such a waste of money IMO dont get me wrong i do it but i also dont mind hand me downs.

However i do agree with a PP i would only probably do it till a ceartin age and while i may still use hand me downs it would probably be things they can just hang around in and my kids are ok with it.

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

Posted by cheryl28

If I knew where they came from I wouldn't care and have done it. My sister gives me all her dd's clothes. From friends I wouldn't care.

I personally would not buy second hand clothes. There's nothing wrong with it but I feel that I don't know where they have been . I don't really know my reasoning, I just don't feel comfortable buying used clothing.

But again, I know plenty of people that do and more power to them saving a bucket load of cash

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

My DH is the exact same way. He doesn't want to take clothes from anyone-not even family.

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

Love that store! We find great deals there for our whole family and DH doesn't mind at all.

Continue to shop there and enjoy

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

Consignment shops are SOOOOOO big down South! Everytime I go to my sister's house in NC, I stock up! When you think about it, most kids only wear each outfit they have a few times before they grow out of them. I am super picky when I look through the racks - go over everything a few times before I decide to buy or not. You get such amazing things! And lots of them are brand new with tags. I see nothing wrong with second hand clothing. As a matter of fact, I get so many compliments on DD's clothes and I love seeing the looks on people's faces when I tell them how much each thing was!

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

I dont see it being a probem for kids..when they approach tween/teen years, i agree with the previous poster that it gets to be an issue b/c of how kids get teased with stuff like that.

my parents were broke too and i never had clothes like my friends had. So i know how that goes.

but for infant/baby/toddler stuff they were for such a short time..totally for it!

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

At this age they are outgrowing them or ruining them SO fast it doesn't pay to spend a lot.
I have NO SHAME in taking hand me downs or used things.
As long as you wash them, I see nothing wrong with it.
Now is the time to do it, before they get too picky about clothes!

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

We got a lot of used clothes, and/or thrift store clothes. DS is in 3rd grade, so we don't do it as much now, because of peer pressure issues mentioned above, but when they are pre-school age, it seems like a big waste of money. I would rather use that money for more important things (bills, savings, college fund, etc).

Even brand-new clothes might be "used"... I'm sure there are clothes that we buy off the shelf that have been tried on by other kids already, so what's the difference? Some "used" clothes have probably been worn less than "new" clothes.... We've donated, and bought clothes from thrift stores that still had tags on them, so they weren't worn by the child they were bought for.

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

DD is the only girl on my side and one of two on DH's. We didn't get much in the way of hand-me-downs, but I wish we did. She grows out of clothes so quickly.

I've never bought used clothes for DD (though 2x I bought stuff w/tags on it from other moms). But if it was in good shape, and you washed it first, IMO it's fine.

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

I think your DH is being ridiculous. Spending 10 times more for the same pair of jeans just to be the first person who owned them??? When your child is most like not even going to be able to wear them for more than 6 months? Kids clothes are so expensive and so temporary!!

To me, that's like taking your money out of your wallet and setting it on fire instead of putting it in the bank.

My kids have a TON of clothes - I buy them a lot and I take hand me downs from anyone who wants to give them to me. If it's in good shape and I like it, my kids wear it. If it's not, then I toss it or pass it on. No one can tell they're wearing hand me downs.

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

I LOVE second hand clothes! I can buy super cute unique boutique stuff at a fraction of the price as it costs new! I often find brand new with tags stuff at the second hand store, Gymboree, at about 75% of the cost at the retail store.

How does your husband feel about eating off plates that other people have eaten off of when he goes out to eat? Maybe throw him that comparison

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

thank u for all the responses.

I know marriage is about compromise, but I think he's being so silly and I told him just that.

He's so freaked out by second-hand stuff. I used to be, so I guess I kind of understand, but I'm not like that anymore. But Children's Place jeans for $2???? How can u pass that up??

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

90% of DS's clothes come from a purchase I made on LIF and the rest are gifts or i bought in the store cause i couldn't resist.

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

I'd pick bigger battles. Let DH have this one.

Re: Do I compromise? or is DH being a stick in the mud? re:used clothes.

I'll probably be in the minority on this but I don't buy used clothes for my DS. I just don't like the idea of him wearing something that belonged to someone else. He grew incredibly fast his 1st year, from 6 lbs at birth to 25 lbs and I had to buy ridiculous amounts of clothes bc he was constantly outgrowing them, still, always new. And I don't plan on having a subsequent DC wear my own DS' clothes.

However, I don't see anything wrong with it if someone else does it, it's a personal thing. For some people, buying second-hand clothes is in a financial necessity and you have to do what you have to to be able to care for your children. If it came to it, I would buy second-hand if it meant keeping my child warm, kwim.

But if you don't NEED to buy second-hand and your DH is opposed to it, I would respect his decision. Some people, like me, are just weird about certain things.