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LotsaLuv
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Member since 6/10 4094 total posts
Name:
F
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Childcare
Is anyone having family watch DS/DD when they go back to work? If so, how do you feel about it? Are you nervous it will cause problems?
I am on the fence, the pluses are saving money, baby being cared for by someone who loves her, but the minuses are would it ruin my relationship with MIL since it has put a strain on her relationship with SIL since she has been taking care of my nephew? Do I expect her to follow what I think is best for DD, or since she is the caretaker she can do things her way? her saying she is not there to dicipline only there to be gma makes me nervous, she is a caretaker and should dicipline, saying no is part of life.
Any advice pros/cons?
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Posted 3/21/11 5:30 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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Re: Childcare
It's good and bad, depends on how you look at it or how your parents/in-laws are.
For me, I save a ton of money..especially now with another on the way.
I don't have to worry about getting a nanny cam or popping in to see how things are going, etc. I don't have to worry about not bringing peanut butter or something, and if he is sick, he can still go to Grandma's. If I have a meeting after work that runs late or wasn't pre-planned, I don't have to rush home, that kind of thing...so my career can still be a big priority - which is important to me.
As far as what goes on, it's my rules. It's my kid, so I expect my rules to be followed when I am not there.
The thing I don't like is that my son doesn't have any little friends. So I have to make up a lot of time at the playground so he can interact with other children.
It's good and bad, I guess.
Is your SIL becoming resentful?
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| Posted 3/21/11 5:50 PM |
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LotsaLuv
Us
Member since 6/10 4094 total posts
Name:
F
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Re: Childcare
Posted by LadyBugN2Buggies
It's good and bad, depends on how you look at it or how your parents/in-laws are.
For me, I save a ton of money..especially now with another on the way.
I don't have to worry about getting a nanny cam or popping in to see how things are going, etc. I don't have to worry about not bringing peanut butter or something, and if he is sick, he can still go to Grandma's. If I have a meeting after work that runs late or wasn't pre-planned, I don't have to rush home, that kind of thing...so my career can still be a big priority - which is important to me.
As far as what goes on, it's my rules. It's my kid, so I expect my rules to be followed when I am not there.
The thing I don't like is that my son doesn't have any little friends. So I have to make up a lot of time at the playground so he can interact with other children.
It's good and bad, I guess.
Is your SIL becoming resentful?
She's not so much resentful because she is a career woman, I think it's more of following rules. Sometimes I think MIL thinks cause she watches him it's her rules mixed in with theirs, this year there was an issue because MIL made a Christmas list and gingerbread house with my nephew so that was a little bit of an issue, the gingerbread house I don't see the big deal cause he has done them before, but the Christmas list and letter to Santa that is for mom & dad to do in my opinion, so I think in some instances she crosses the line, but not on purpose just cause she looks for things to do, but at the end of the day is causes an issue because she doesn't see the big deal in it.
Also he is never around other children when he's with her, it's the two of them all day, she does a lot of crafts and stuff with him, tons of activities takes him places, but no other kids, I am a strong beliver in social interaction.
I am just so on the fence with this lol
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| Posted 3/21/11 6:00 PM |
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Re: Childcare
ahhh....I see. Yes, that would definitely bug me, especially the letter to Santa. I wonder if you gave her certain conditions and she could respect them, it may work. That's one thing that is hard to avoid...the blurred line between child care giver and Grandparent. I have "fired" Grandma about 3 times, but she was always rehired. 
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| Posted 3/21/11 6:04 PM |
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mrsyoungmommy
can't wait to meet Sophia!
Member since 6/10 1441 total posts
Name:
Danielle
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Re: Childcare
I don't know. My MIL and sister will be watching the baby and I feel that I need to be more lenient with how they are with  . The only things I "expect" to be followed is his feeding times. Other then that, as long as they are keeping him safe and making sure he doesn't terrorize the world, I am going to have to give up control and trust them. My MIL has raised 3 children and my sister has 4, so they obviously know what they are doing.
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| Posted 3/21/11 6:11 PM |
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Erica
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 11767 total posts
Name:
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Re: Childcare
We actually have my mom watch from 3-6 months. I like it that way, since it gives them time to bond, it saves a little money and I feel safe with DC there. I wish it could be a year, but I don't want to make my mom have such a commitment in retirement (they like to go on vacations)
But I like that DC go on to a center where they get other interactions as well.
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| Posted 3/21/11 6:12 PM |
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LotsaLuv
Us
Member since 6/10 4094 total posts
Name:
F
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Re: Childcare
Posted by mrsyoungmommy
I don't know. My MIL and sister will be watching the baby and I feel that I need to be more lenient with how they are with . The only things I "expect" to be followed is his feeding times. Other then that, as long as they are keeping him safe and making sure he doesn't terrorize the world, I am going to have to give up control and trust them. My MIL has raised 3 children and my sister has 4, so they obviously know what they are doing.
I guess thats what it comes down to, letting go of control which is hard to do
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| Posted 3/21/11 6:18 PM |
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