Feeling guilty for not wanting to take ds places at 5 mths

The Splish Splash post got me thinking about this- I would never be able to take ds w/ me. I can't help it- almost every time I take him somewhere with me- like dinner etc. he seems so uncomfortable and often freaks out in the car on the way home. Also, he never wants to sit in the stroller when we r out- he wants to be held all the time in a "standing" position! This makes everything especially hard when dh isn't there- like a girl's night out- my gfs are always like brrrinnnnggg the babbbby and I'm always thinking ugghhh. Then I feel SOOO guilty for thinking that!! However, my MIL lives around the corner and we go there every day so I always have the option of leaving him there and he loooves it- so when I take him somewhere and he seems miserable I always think I should have just left him...

He is turning 5 mths next week. Do you think he will enjoy stuff more once he can sit up by himself? He plays with toys but in a new environment he is too distracted and just wants to look around. So, I don't want to deprive him of new experiences but I can't exactly walk around with him in a restaurant for 2 hours, kwim?

ETA House parties/bbq types things r 50/50. Sometimes he goes w/ the flow and enjoys himself and sometimes he is super craaannnkkkkyy.

Message edited 7/18/2010 12:41:46 PM.

Re: Feeling guilty for not wanting to take ds places at 5 mths

every baby is different, so i can only speak from the POV from my 2.

i brought josh everywhere all the time.
he did not mind, he always screamed in the car no matter where we were going, never napped or slept.
this kid, to this day, can be anywhere at any hour and not whine or cry. he just adjusts.
jessie...is a sleeper who enjoys her own bed.
i feel bad about it at times, but i can't stay in eight hours a day while she naps.
so she is out and about at almost 5 months and getting use to sleeping in car, stroller...last night we were at our friend's house, she fell asleep in bouncy seat and was fine.

so no harm in leaving him home...but i think the more you bring them out the better they will adjust.

Re: Feeling guilty for not wanting to take ds places at 5 mths

I think happy mommy = happy baby so if it's stressful to take him out, don't. He's only 5 months old - he'll have plenty of chances for things like Splish Splash.

That being said, if you want to do this but just have trouble holding him, try the Ergo - I love mine and could carry DD in it for hours. I have a terrible back so it's really the only carrier I can use since it puts weight on your hips - which I can totally feel after the fact if I've carried her for too long.

Re: Feeling guilty for not wanting to take ds places at 5 mths

I was nervous about taking DS out too, but then I thought that I couldn't and WOULDN'T live my life around a baby. So, I started to take him out. Yes, he screamed and cried, but each time we went somewhere, it was less and less. Now, I can tie him in a knot and he won't fuss at all! I think the more you do with him, the better and faster he'll adjust. Start small, like a walk around the block (or someone else's block like near a park so you don't feel embarrassed). Take him to a friend's house. Come to a GTG where all of us will be completely understanding and probably won't notice a fussing baby. You will be out one day, it's just a matter of when. It almost comes down to when YOU'RE ready, not so much DS.

Re: Feeling guilty for not wanting to take ds places at 5 mths

I bring my kids out all the time. i did get to a point where i wanted to eat out less because eating out was becoming more work than pleasure, but if we are going out to eat, i still bring them. i think a lot of it is practice makes, well not perfect, but easier. my second DD always screams in the car no matter what. that part is rough, but i figure it will pass eventually. she also really likes to be held and doesn't like the stroller, so the baby bjorn has become my friend. i used it probably once or twice with my first daughter, and all the time with my second.