My sister... (long ramble/vent) ok super long sorry

Is driving me INSANE!!

She is the epitomy of bridezilla! Seriously but she pretends like she is all laid back about it.

She keeps comparing her wedding to my pregnancy which in my opinion just cannot be compared. They are two totally different experiences. My family is not very fond of her FH (me included) He lacks common manners and is very loud and abrasive. My sister has changed dramatically since meeting him. She is/was a very successful person and smart, put together, takes good care of herself, etc. Well not anymore she has become mean and treats our family poorly.

So my parents are not super excited about her upcoming wedding. She is upset about it, I know my parents try but it is hard to be genuinly happy when you are upset that your daughter is settling. I feel the same way as them. I feel like I lost my sister and at this point I dont even like to be around them.

This is why my sister keeps comparing it b/c my parents are so excited for me and can't wait to have their first grandchild. So my sister is jealous of their enthusiasm towards me. It bothers me so much and I just want to say something to her.

Also I am her MOH and she is constantly checking up on everything I am doing (her shower/bachelorette, etc) she is trying to micromanage me. I believe she thinks I wont do a good job for her. I am wayyyy more laid back and she is very anal and plans her life 10 years in advance. Just b/c I am laid back doesnt mean I would do any less of a good job for her.

There are sooo many things going on but I am just so fed up with her she is soo self centered it is insane. When I told her I was pregnant (2nd person) she barely acknowledged it then said "I've noticed some tension between you and my FH...." and we talked about that for 1 hour!!! I honestly REALLY dont like him AT ALL. I was so upset about her reaction that I was just honest (in a nice way) and said he is rude to our parents and has changed you...she said "well this is the real me"

Sorry I am rambling, I am just so upset about this situation, its like she is in a cult, he controls her and has changed her dramatically. Him and I really CLASH b/c I stand up to him and he isnt used to that.

When she was originally picking her bridesmaids she said myself and her BF would be "co-maid of honors" well that ****** my Mom off. I think she feels I am incompetent (I am 5 years younger) I know I am not but she is a crazy bridezilla and wants every detail of everything to be exact and perfect. So my sister changed it to just me being her MOH. Her friend still constantly emails me and wants to be involved (which I am all for), Wedding is 6 months away still! This started a long time ago!

She has been waiting for this her whole life. SO my question is would it be horrible of me to tell her I think her friend should be the MOH and I will help as much as I can but she can spearhead things. Honestly I think she would be relieved if I said this, I think she is stressing herself and me out about it. I cant be stressed about her wedding when I have my own things going on (a life growing inside of me) My doctor scolded me the other day for being stressed and doing too much..

Theres so much more to this but I cant go on forever I am just so torn and feel like I am stuck in the worst situation. At her shower I will be 8 months preggo, at her wedding my baby will be around 2 weeks old. To me that is alot to deal with, can I bow out gracefully?

Re: My sister... (long ramble/vent) ok super long sorry

i understand where you are coming from and have dealt with a similar situation. things thankfully have gotten better though.
I think that if your sister really wants her BF to be MOH and you don't want to do then i would hand the reigns over to the friend. I'm sorry that you have to deal with this and i hope it all works out! good luck!

Re: My sister... (long ramble/vent) ok super long sorry

First off I'm sorry you're in this situation to begin with.

How about throwing out a feeler? Like not bowing out completely, but throwing out the idea - something like "Jane is so involved and on top of things, I feel bad she's not your MOH instead of me" - something to get a reaction out of her. Or offer it and see if she takes you up on being just a BM and having her friend be MOH.

Re: My sister... (long ramble/vent) ok super long sorry