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CrankyPants
I'm cranky
Member since 7/06 18178 total posts
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Mama Cranky
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Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
Not sure if you guys saw this, but Chastity Bono is undergoing sex reassignment and Acerone just posted a current picture of him/her.
I remember when Chastity "came out" and Cher was not supportive. Eventually Cher came around.
I wonder how Cher feels about this.
How would you feel if your child went through something like this as an adult?
I consider myself moderately open minded, but I cannot imagine how I would react if my child came to me about something like this years down the road.
I saw something about this on Oprah or Dr. Phil a couple months ago-only on the show it was kids coming forward wanting to be the opposite gender and parents eventually supporting it. I just don't know how I would deal with that.
Message edited 10/27/2009 1:32:53 PM.
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Posted 10/27/09 1:32 PM  |
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brownie
Baby #1 is here!
Member since 11/08 13903 total posts
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
I would say I'd support my child's decision if it made her/him happier...
but its easy to say when I'm not in those shoes 
Must be hard as a parent though for sure!
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| Posted 10/27/09 1:34 PM |
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MarisaK
HELLO Manolo !!
Member since 5/06 14562 total posts
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Marisa
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
That's one of those things you can not even begin to comprehend the 'what ifs' until you've BTDT -
Honestly, I'd LOVE to say I'd be the best, most supportive, perfect Mother ever .......but I think I might lose my sh*t over that one ..........
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| Posted 10/27/09 1:43 PM |
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KateDevine
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Member since 6/06 24950 total posts
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
I hope that I can always be supportive of my child's decisions, I am sure this will take a lot of getting used to, but if it is what makes them happy....
I wonder if Cher already has come to terms with it, being that Chaz has been "out" for a while, and I'm sure this surgery has been a long time coming, youknow?
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| Posted 10/27/09 1:45 PM |
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Angel321
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Member since 4/08 15553 total posts
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
Posted by brownie
I would say I'd support my child's decision if it made her/him happier...
but its easy to say when I'm not in those shoes
Must be hard as a parent though for sure!
ita!
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| Posted 10/27/09 1:45 PM |
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FelAndJon
needs to update her avatar pic
Member since 6/05 10212 total posts
Name:
Felice (aka LuckyBride2004)
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
Honestly, especially in this situation, it wasn't as if Chastity woke up one morning and announced she wanted to be a boy. She has been out and saying that she was a girl in a boys body for so many years. I can't imagine this was a surprise for anyone.
Now, how would I feel about gender reassignment? I guess if either of my sons didn't feel like they were in the right body, I would support whatever decision he wanted to make. They are my children, regardless of what they look like. 
Now, I really hope you are not asking how we would feel if our children were gay... (meaning I really hope all parents would support and love their children regardless of who they choose to love)
Message edited 10/27/2009 1:50:46 PM.
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| Posted 10/27/09 1:50 PM |
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organichic
LIF Adult
Member since 9/08 2223 total posts
Name:
Lauren
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
Posted by davenjess
Posted by brownie
I would say I'd support my child's decision if it made her/him happier...
but its easy to say when I'm not in those shoes
Must be hard as a parent though for sure!
ita!
me too... It must be very hard, but I can imagine it is harder for the person going through the gender issues. I would support my childs decision 100%
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| Posted 10/27/09 1:51 PM |
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cjik
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Member since 2/06 8879 total posts
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
I would support him, what else could I do? But it would bother me on some level that he was not happy as the person he was born, kwim? I think people who choose to do this must go through a lot of unhappiness before they decide to make this change, so it would upset me that he was that unhappy (and he would probably still have problems after).
I would also have a hard time not thinking of him as my boy.
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| Posted 10/27/09 1:51 PM |
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CrankyPants
I'm cranky
Member since 7/06 18178 total posts
Name:
Mama Cranky
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
Posted by FelAndJon
Now, I really hope you are not asking how we would feel if our children were gay... (meaning I really hope all parents would support and love their children regardless of who they choose to love)
No, I'm asking about the gender issue.
I would like to think that all parents would support and love their children through this too, but I think I would have a hard time coming to terms with it.
I mean, you see old pictures of her with her parents and she's in cute little dresses, a pretty little girl. And now, she's not that anymore. I cannot imagine my DD as anything but my DD and really don't know how I would react/adjust.
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| Posted 10/27/09 1:57 PM |
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Annie91606
Brotherly love
Member since 12/07 1816 total posts
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Anne
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
I am sure it would be hard for me, not what you envision for your child when they grow up being one gender, then want to be another.
But I would try very very hard to be as supportive and loving as possible. The important thing is for DS to be happy and healthy.
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| Posted 10/27/09 1:59 PM |
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JBmommy
LIF Infant
Member since 8/09 252 total posts
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
Posted by brownie
I would say I'd support my child's decision if it made her/him happier...
but its easy to say when I'm not in those shoes
Must be hard as a parent though for sure!
Exactly, I would really try my best to be as supportive as possible. It is so sad to see people struggle with gender issues, to be so uncomfortable in their own skin. I say life is too short, you have to do what makes you happy.
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| Posted 10/27/09 1:59 PM |
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Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!
Member since 8/05 14470 total posts
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Veronica
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
Posted by MarisaK
That's one of those things you can not even begin to comprehend the 'what ifs' until you've BTDT -
Honestly, I'd LOVE to say I'd be the best, most supportive, perfect Mother ever .......but I think I might lose my sh*t over that one ..........
 so true
I love my kiddo and im sure id still love her no matter what at least somewhere in my mind and heart she'll always be my little girl.
Still I can't imagine to even think about how I'd react.
A friend of mine is going through this right now. He's married and has a 8month old. He has always (always) wanted to be a she since he was little. His mother always bought him barbies, wigs, etc. He's finally come to the point where he prefers himself as a she 100% of the time. Its really hard on him, his wife and his family. But for him its the only way he can look at himself in the mirror each morning.
He's a good friend and of course I support him and think its great his wife is still standing beside him (She knew this before she married him) and I want to tell him that 100% I'd stand by if my daughter did the same but I can't honestly say that right now. He knows this and even says that too many people make assumptions of what their tolerances are until it actually happens. His father (who also of course knew) is devastated and can not seem to come to terms with this new change of behavior to be open about his choice.
He says just trying to be open minded is a good start because you really can't know how you will react until it happens. Education and exposure are his goals. To show people why he 'has' to do this and that is not 'dirty' or wrong. He's fighting stigma this whole thing seems to carry.
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| Posted 10/27/09 2:30 PM |
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JennZ
MY LIFE!!
Member since 8/05 25463 total posts
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
From what I understand Cher is 100% behind him.
If it were me, I think there would be some disappointment, but ultimately if DS was happier being DD, then so be it. As long as he is happy, I don't care who he loves, or what he wants to be. Man/woman.
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| Posted 10/27/09 2:34 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
It would be hard to adjust to a change that I was mentally unprepared for. However, it would be harder for me to see my child in pain. Seeing the mental anguish of living as they didn't feel they were orignally intended, would be far worse.
I would accept & welcome my child no matter what the gender.
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| Posted 10/27/09 2:38 PM |
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kerrycec03
Mom of 2 beautiful boys!!
Member since 6/06 13519 total posts
Name:
Kerry
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
Posted by brownie
I would say I'd support my child's decision if it made her/him happier...
but its easy to say when I'm not in those shoes
Must be hard as a parent though for sure!
ditto. I think my DH would have a VERY hard time with it though.
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| Posted 10/27/09 2:39 PM |
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dpli
Daylight savings :)
Member since 5/05 13973 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
I feel pretty confident in saying that I will ALWAYS love my child. I can't say with confidence I will always love their decisions or choices in life.
I would hate to see my child struggle with gender identity, but I honestly don't know how I would react until I was in that situation.
I have read interviews about Chaz and read her book and Cher was not supportive at all when she came out. Cher had/has tons of gay friends and fans, but had a tough time dealing with HER daughter being gay. I like to think I am open minded and non-judgmental, but I don't know if you always react rationally when it's your own kid, KWIM?
I think also, as a parent, you sometimes mourn what your hopes and dreams were for a child when those things never come to fruition.
Message edited 10/27/2009 2:49:04 PM.
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| Posted 10/27/09 2:47 PM |
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SweetTooth
I'm a tired mommy!
Member since 12/05 20105 total posts
Name:
Lauren
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
Would it be difficult? Absolutely.
Would I be supportive and love my child no matter what? Absolutely.
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| Posted 10/27/09 3:16 PM |
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eddiesmommy
best buds!
Member since 5/09 11524 total posts
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Melissa
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
I would always love and support him no matter what.
For myself though, I would probably "mourn" the loss of my little boy and all the dreams that I had attached to that over the course of his lifetime.
So it wouldnt be the physical fact of the change but a personal emotional mourning for myself that had nothing to do with whether I loved or supported my DS.
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| Posted 10/27/09 3:45 PM |
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DancinBarefoot
06ers Rock!!
Member since 1/07 9537 total posts
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The One My Mother Gave Me ;-)
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Re: Parenting spinoff to Chaz Bono on the Celebrity board
It's an interesting question. Given that I interact with people on a fairly regular basis who suffer from gender identity disorder, I have a pretty good handle on the emotional struggle people go through before getting to the point of gender reassignment surgery.
I'm confident in my ability to 100% accept and support my child's decision, and would hope that it would come before the years and years of anguish that most go through.
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| Posted 10/27/09 4:47 PM |
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