Like, seriously???

So, I was on the phone with my dad-- and he asks how I am feeling, how I am looking, etc.

As you all know-- since I incessantly post about it-- I don't really look pregnant, and I just feel like I look fat. Which I relayed to my dad.

You ask what his response is...?

"Well, if you feel fat, you should go on a diet."

Um, hello... I am pregnant arsehole!! Pregnant women don't diet! It's not like I am eating french fries and candy all day long either.

This comment may explain some of my body/weight issues.

Now, I am going to see him tonight for the holiday and I am anxious to see him. I feel like he is going to be like "checking me out" and will make comments like the above in front of other people.

I remember he made comments to my SIL when she was prego like, "wow, you really filled out", and "yeah, you have gotten wider". And this is someone he is not even blood related to! He is the king of inappropriate comments and is obessed with weight. I have sworn this is something I WILL NOT put on my children!

Re: Like, seriously???

Wow...

If he says something to you, just say listen I really don't need to hear any innappropriate comments from you.

....Especially from someone who thinks you need to "diet" while you're pregnant.

Re: Like, seriously???

UGHH...see I can't bite my tounge, I would quip back you should take your own advice, how old are you know, you're looking a bit tired and much older..have u seen a dr lately...that should shut him up...
My dad and I are exactly alike personality wise, he is very very sarcastic and has a very mean sense of humor, I've always been able to take it, my mom hasn't, she is ultra sensitive...might be part of the reason they recently got divorced ....Anyway, my dad is probably the most excited that I'm having a baby girl, but when I started to pop his reaction was "wow, you look like a house, but in a good way" and laughed...he knows I can take it, and he knows I know who its coming from, my dad is always the one telling me I dont' eat enough....BUT, coming from someone that you may not be that that close with and he is doing it not in a way that is funny or appropriate, I would tell him to go where the sun don't shine..you have yom kippur to atone for your sins...so get them in now..

Re: Like, seriously???

ugh, i'm so sorry and I can so relate in a sense. Growing up my parents were always the first to "let me know" if I was gaining weight or not...which of course did wonders for my self-esteem, but that's a whole nother episode of Dr. Phil.....

Anyway, I too am so anxious every time I see them, which is not too often cause I'm unsure as to their reaction. I saw them yesterday and my dad was making the hugest deal out of the fact that I was showing and my mom was floored that I was wearing a maternity shirt. But not in an excited-we're so happy way, more like I was I was a zoo exhibit. And they wonder why I don't go visit them that often.

Then we stopped by FIL and his wife's house (DH's parents are both remarried) and FIL's wife says, "wow, you're pretty big already for how far long your are". To quote you Randi, "like seriously???" Thanks so making me feel good. DH snapped at her and said he thinks I look beautiful which made me happy but still....I constantly feel like people are checking out my "size" and it's so anxiety-inducing.

I just try to ignore my father and like I said, not visit them as often as would be nice. Don't know if that's an option for you.

Re: Like, seriously???

It doesn't help that I am very sensitive-- but, I have been getting comments like this since puberty... so, I am sorta used to them by now-- BUT, with the added factor of hormones, forget it!

I don't just sit there and take it... but, it still stings nontheless.

I remember when my dad came to see me the day of the wedding, or the day before-- and my dress was hanging up filled with all the tissue (like there was someone in it). He also made a comment like-- wow, I can't believe how small that is-- You should keep up with the gym and stuff so you stay that way-- he said this to me on my wedding day!!

I am all for making sure your kids are healthy, and are the best they can be, and he doesn't "get it", and I know he is not being mean when he says these things. It's just so insensitive.

And I don't see my dad as often as my mom-- they are divorced-- I know, shocker! I honestly don't know how my mom was married to a man who made comments like that-- she has since told me that he made similar comments to her when they were married.

Re: Like, seriously???

I'm sorry.That was really insensitive. My father's family has always been like that about weight. My father, however, is overweight and never once made a comment about mine or my brother's weight. I think it always upset him so he never did it to us. So even though you can't change your father, you will, as you said above, be able to not put that stress on your own kids. Its kind of a "like, seriously" whithout having to say it.

Re: Like, seriously???

My best advice and may help you look Pg is wear tight clothes. I saw your pictures and you definitly have a little baby bump and if people you know see this they will think you popped. All I wore were fitted shirts and pants throughout both PG's.

Re: Like, seriously???

Re: Like, seriously???

I think it may have a lot to do with the issues you have spoken about in the fast. You probably have felt pressure from him.

i am sorry--u are a healthy girl and u need to eat for the baby---not diet

Re: Like, seriously???

Re: Like, seriously???

Eh, he's a guy. Guys typically don't get it. I would cut him a little slack.

Also (I hope you won't mind me saying this), you need to LET GO of the apprehension you have about looking pregnant. Don't worry so much what other people think!