spinoff of sorts...do you believe that believing something about yourself

diminishes others in your eyes:

do you believe it's possible to think of yourself as being beautiful or smart, and NOT have it be in comparison to or at the expense of those around you?

Can you have feelings on an entirely personal level and not have them extend to how you feel about other people?

Can Ophelia explain this correctly?

Re: spinoff of sorts...do you believe that believing something about yourself

I think it is possible to think of something without it being a comparison. did I answer the question?

Re: spinoff of sorts...do you believe that believing something about yourself

I can think I'm smart without thinking I'm smarter than others.

BUT, I can't think someone is beautiful without thinking they're more beautiful than me.

Its funny, we could never know things without a comparison. Without evil there would be no good. Without darkness there would be no light. It's kind of the whole yin yang thing.

Re: spinoff of sorts...do you believe that believing something about yourself

Re: spinoff of sorts...do you believe that believing something about yourself

Re: spinoff of sorts...do you believe that believing something about yourself

Of course!

Re: spinoff of sorts...do you believe that believing something about yourself

In MY own eyes no.

Re: spinoff of sorts...do you believe that believing something about yourself

Re: spinoff of sorts...do you believe that believing something about yourself

No I don't.

I think believing something about yourself doesn't *always* have to be in comparison. You can think of yourself as beautiful without it being a competition.

However, I do think most often when judging things, most people use a range which is based on other people. Using beauty as an example, there are different types of beauty (exotic, etc)

Re: spinoff of sorts...do you believe that believing something about yourself

I tend to compare only negatively towards myself (if that makes any sense).

For example, I like my hair. It works for me, but I see tons of people whose hair I also love and I can be totally objective about it.

I don't like my body. So if I think someone else has a good body then I am automatically comparing them to me and thinking that theirs is better than mine. BUT, I can see people that may be heavier or curvier than me and think that they look better than me too. It's because I am not happy with mine, so I think it's the worst and all look better.

Hope that answers the question.

Re: spinoff of sorts...do you believe that believing something about yourself

I think that people perceive any kind of self confidence or self love or even self LIKE as conceit. Most people define conceit as a character deficit wherein a person thinks that they are 'better' than other people. So when someone says "Wow - I look hot today." - people automatically translate that into "Wow I look hot today and I am smarter, prettier, funnier and altogether better than everyone else - including YOU."

It's sad because self confidence does not necessarily mean conceited or totally self absorbed. A certain amount of self centeredness is necessary in my opinion.

As to me.... the answer is no - believing anything about myself does not diminish anyone else in my eyes. I can love my curly blonde hair and still think that your straighter brunette locks are equally or even more attractive.

Message edited 2/21/2008 2:24:17 PM.

Re: spinoff of sorts...do you believe that believing something about yourself

I think that maybe my brain stopped working, because I clicked this post, read the question, and my head started hurting. so I'm gonna click out and go somewhere else....