When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

at what age is appropriate?

not about love and the birds and the bees

but about AIDS, STDs, birth control, not being promiscuous ,etc...

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

at the rate it's going these days, i feel like it's going to be our first day of school chat (Hence why we're thinking of just having dogs instead of kids- no one gets mad if you neuter a dog!)

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

I knew girls that had sex in 7th grade

and I went to one of the "best" public schools on LI

so the earlier the better

my sister was very young when she learned about stuff- mainly b/c we would watch rated R movies and not kick her out (when I say we- I mean my whole family parents and all)

she knew at about 9 that when you have sex- you use a "contact" (instead on condom )

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

Sadly,AT LEAST by the age of 9 I'll be having "the talk" with my daughters.....

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

I have no kids yet, but I am thinking as young as middle/ elementary school......by the time my kids are this old God knows what will be going on!

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

I was 9 when my mom gave me that talk.

I was reading "Are You There God? It's Me Margaret" by Judy Blume and had no idea what a period was.

So my talk came early because I was reading above my reading level at that age.

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

My son was 9, I didn't think he was ready for the talk & I wasn't ready to have with him but THANKS TO BILL CLINTON I had no choice. Kids in my son's grade were reading Newsday everyday as part of their classroom ciriculum and since INTERCOURSE & Oral Sex were in the paper on a daily basis it was important I discussed it with my child.
Really not how I imagined our talk would go, I never thought I'd be using the president as the example for the meaning of the words.
Maybe Jamie Lynn or Bristol are better, I'm not sure.

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

I wanted to get to them before they got too old and felt embarrassed to talk to me...

When they were not quite 8 they started asking questions. I started giving answers. The biology answers but in kid friendly terms but with no sugar coating. Since then, little by little, they will ask me questions. I answer them honestly and openly. I just want to keep the lines of communication open...

I firmly believe the younger the better. If you wait until they were 12/13 or older they are going to be too embarrassed to talk to you..and they already "know it all" b/c they have talked to their friends.

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

Never.

We've decided that we're just gonna keep our heads in the sand and hope our kids learn everything they need to know from the streets and school.

That way we don't have to blame ourselves when something goes wrong!

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

Is this something I can just leave to the nanny?

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

Posted by Jennie0898

Never.

We've decided that we're just gonna keep our heads in the sand and hope our kids learn everything they need to know from the streets and school.

That way we don't have to blame ourselves when something goes wrong!

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

Posted by MrsERod

Posted by Jennie0898

Never.

We've decided that we're just gonna keep our heads in the sand and hope our kids learn everything they need to know from the streets and school.

That way we don't have to blame ourselves when something goes wrong!

hi mom

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

9-10

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

It's not a set age. When they express interest - my guess is going to be 9 or so. My friends is a middle school teacher & 12 year olds are having oral sex, etc. It also has very little to do with Bill Clinton.

But I do expect to have the AIDS, promiscuity conversation would go hand-in-hand with the love & birds/bees conversation.

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

My son isn't born yet (as I anxiously await his arrival any day). With that being said I think the age of 9 is appropriate, given the maturity level of the child.

I say this because I work in a residential treatment center with boys who have sexually acted out and commited sexual offenses against other children. They are placed in my program beginning as young as 10 and their offenses are not small. I'm talking big time offenses. I love my job and the kids I work with and it has really taught me to be more open minded about the possibilities...good and bad..when it comes to younger than teen/teen sex. Maybe I am jaded now, but DH and I will do our very best to educate our son (and any other future children we have) as soon as we can.

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

My DD will be 8 in Oct and just recently ( a few weeks) she started to ask questions about sex. She writes them on a peice of paper, leaves the room while i read and write back, then she comes gets the paper and we talk about it. I try to answer her questions as honestly and limited as i can, and some specific questions she has about what goes on between her dad and I, i simply say are non of her business. i havent given her the "run down" per say, but i do answer whatever questions she has.

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

Oh wow. I don't know. Most likely DH will have it (we have a boy), but I may need to chime in a little too. Maybe a bit around 9 or so--that's when I got my first talk, mostly about where babies come from.

Definitely by the time he's 10 or 11 though since such young kids are active these days.

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

Dont have set age in mind.. im going to see how things go with my child.. by whos shes hanging out with and just watching her closely how she acts. These days kids learn alot at such a young age... its scarey.


eta: DH wants me to talk to my dd, b/c im female but i feel we both should talk to her.. that way she knows she can be open with both of us and not be embarassed.

Message edited 9/2/2008 9:18:13 AM.

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

I really don't know... maybe 10 or so?

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

8-9 yrs old. Sexuality seems to get younger and younger these days. I know my 11 yr old niece , well lets just say 11 is too old , so I will opt for a few years before.

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

My mom had the talk with me when I was like 11 or 12.....she had me believing that sex was only done to have babies I still remember my first real boyfriend at 16 asking me to do it and I said hell no, I don't want no babies

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

Don't have kids yet, but I'm thinking 9/10...somewhere around there.

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

my son was 10 when he asked me how does God put the baby in a mommy's tummy. i wanted to DIE!!!

but i answered his question.

right before "the movie" at school, we had another little talk.

not too long ago (in the spring) i posted about having a "consequences of sex" with him when we were watching 20/20 about open adoption (a 16yo girl was giving her baby up for adoption). at this point we talked about std, babies, and emotional maturity.

again, i wanted to DIE!

but i survived

Re: When do you think you are going to have the sex talk with your kids?

great question. i guess my answer is as soon as she is ready i feel like these days kids know more than i did in middle school!!