When do you stop letting your parents make you feel guilty

DH and I are seriouslly thinking about leaving the area and moving to Florida. We live in NJ and my whole family is on LI. We see my family alot.

At what point do we say forget everyone, and do what we want without feeling guilty?

My mother says that they can't move to Florida at this time, don't know if they ever want to. Then...they will never see our children. But, if we move, then they won't see my brother's children.

Why does she have to make me feel guilty

Re: When do you stop letting your parents make you feel guilty

you have to do whats best for you

if you are going to have a better life or better quality of life in florida well then thats your decision to make.

unfortunately they will probably not be happy but arrannge a visiting schedule to appease them

you cant live your life trying to make others happy.

your family will get over it

hugs and good luck!!!!1

Re: When do you stop letting your parents make you feel guilty

Don't make their not seeing someone's children your problem. They will reprioritize and move or visit accordingly.

Re: When do you stop letting your parents make you feel guilty

I am going through something similar! Of course you have to do whats best for you and your child, but sometimes thats easier said than done.

Re: When do you stop letting your parents make you feel guilty

This is a subject close to my heart. I have been ... and still continue to be at times ... way too accomodating to family and everyone in general. If I could give you some advice right now, it would be to make the move if that is what is going to make you happy. If you stay for them, you will find yourself (much like me) living on Long Island ten years from now and really being resentful over it. Life is tooooooooo short ... do what is right for YOU!

Re: When do you stop letting your parents make you feel guilty

I don't think it ever really goes away. i'm not even close to my parents, but I somehow feel guilty when speaking to them. They just know how to hit a nerve and make you second guess yourself, even when you know you are making the right choices.

Re: When do you stop letting your parents make you feel guilty

Posted by luvsun27

DH and I are seriouslly thinking about leaving the area and moving to Florida. We live in NJ and my whole family is on LI. We see my family alot.

At what point do we say forget everyone, and do what we want without feeling guilty?

My mother says that they can't move to Florida at this time, don't know if they ever want to. Then...they will never see our children. But, if we move, then they won't see my brother's children.

Why does she have to make me feel guilty

Re: When do you stop letting your parents make you feel guilty

We are going through a similar situation. As much as I'd love my parents to move to NC with us when we are ready, I don't think that's going to happen.

But ultimately you have to do what is right for you and your family.

Good luck!

Re: When do you stop letting your parents make you feel guilty

I'm going through this right now... It's so hard. DH wants to move to FL too, and, hypothetically, I would LOVE to move to FLorida, but it's gonna be so hard to with my family. They won't make me feel guilty, but I will kinda feel like they are... I'm gonna try to make them buy a second home down there, they've always talked about it, so I'm gonna push that Hope it works out for you!