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armeewife0514
LIF Infant
Member since 7/06 366 total posts
Name:
Tiffany
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Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
So a friend of mine bought a system that boasts two year olds reading. She has a six month old child and was trying to push this system on me. I said that I don't believe in pushing children into things. I think that they should develop on their own. She then went off on me and told me I was depriving my son of his right to education, and that she couldn't be friends with someone who wasn't willing to give their child the best. (Also the same friend who made me cry because I had to go on medication after DS was born and I was unable to breastfeed.) So my question is how soon is too soon. I mean I read to DS and we sing and do colors, and the alphabet but should I invest in this system????
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Posted 5/7/09 10:10 PM  |
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Arieschick29
aries+cancer= pisces&gemini
Member since 3/06 4268 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
I think the question should be "How soon is too soon to ditch this so-called friend"?
You don't need anyone in your life to try and tell you how to raise your child and then make you feel bad for the decisions youve made
But that's just IMO
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| Posted 5/7/09 10:12 PM |
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Deedlebugs
Blessed
Member since 12/05 10281 total posts
Name:
Kiki
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
OMG do NOT let this woman bully you into anything. How dare she say that to you. She has some serious issues. There is no way I would ever speak to this woman again.
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| Posted 5/7/09 10:14 PM |
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DancinBarefoot
06ers Rock!!
Member since 1/07 9534 total posts
Name:
The One My Mother Gave Me ;-)
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
I don't see any need to invest in a "system" to enhance reading skills in a 2 year old, but you're the mommy, you decide.
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| Posted 5/7/09 10:14 PM |
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cj7305
=)
Member since 8/05 12296 total posts
Name:
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
OMG that friend of your is NO kind of friend. How terrible that she made you feel like that. You are not doing anything wrong! Was that the "Your Baby Can Read" system? Seems pretty freaky! Children learn to read when they are ready to read. The most you can do is expose them to books, etc. Don't worry about this at all Oh and I'm a 1st grade teacher if that makes any difference
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| Posted 5/7/09 10:16 PM |
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Arieschick29
aries+cancer= pisces&gemini
Member since 3/06 4268 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
OK I needed a minute because I felt so mad for you
I am an elementary teacher- from my perspective and experience, as long as you are devoting time to read to your child and are invested in his learning then you don't need a system.
Also, be a good role model as your child grows up and read yourself, go to the library etc and your child will be great!
Kids of parents who read to them everynight are much better at school than those who don't and kids who have parents who obviously care as much as you do are even better!!!
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| Posted 5/7/09 10:19 PM |
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bonitachyc
big sister status may 2012!!
Member since 5/08 3242 total posts
Name:
Lupe
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
i agree with all of the above posters, ditch the "friend"! i think you're doing a perfect job as it is!
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| Posted 5/7/09 10:19 PM |
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armeewife0514
LIF Infant
Member since 7/06 366 total posts
Name:
Tiffany
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
Posted by cj7305
OMG that friend of your is NO kind of friend. How terrible that she made you feel like that. You are not doing anything wrong! Was that the "Your Baby Can Read" system? Seems pretty freaky! Children learn to read when they are ready to read. The most you can do is expose them to books, etc. Don't worry about this at all Oh and I'm a 1st grade teacher if that makes any difference
OMG thanks....needless to say we got into a huge fight and it ended with me asking her to leave. I called my cousin who is a pediatrician and she told me that it does the opposite effect on them and prevents social skills that they have to build first. And yes it was "Your baby can read"
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| Posted 5/7/09 10:20 PM |
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waterspout4
My loves
Member since 5/06 19150 total posts
Name:
Kelly
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
Oh goodness. Is this the infomercial?  If it is that infomercial I do remember a post like this about 2 months ago on it. Many said: Why not let kids be kids?
If she wants to be that pushy, then she just pushed you away. Recommending something is fine. Demanding someone do it is just too much. And the fact that she's done this before just shows she is too pushy.
My rule:
The only reason to be so demanding as a parent over something is if you believe the child will be decapitated or set on fire if they don't do it.
Message edited 5/7/2009 10:23:04 PM.
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| Posted 5/7/09 10:21 PM |
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
OK - every kid before this woman's kid managed to learn to read JUST fine. I'm sure Einstein did not have this state of the art reading system. 
It's called a book and 15 minutes. It worked for every kid whose parents took the time to read to them.
Message edited 5/7/2009 10:23:24 PM.
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| Posted 5/7/09 10:22 PM |
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GoldenRod
10 years on LIF!
Member since 11/06 26792 total posts
Name:
Shawn
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
DS is an extremely advanced reader for his age, and was reading very young. We never used a "system" other than encouraging him to read, and reading to him. That's just him. Everyone learns at their own pace. From what *I've* seen and heard about that "system", it may slow down their real reading skills. They are learning to recognize pictures. Instead of a picture of a dog, the "picture" is in the shape of "dog". They aren't learning to "read", IMO, and *I* think it will hinder them when they get to school.
BTW, like it was repeatedly mentioned above, you don't need a toxic "friend" who will criticize you for every decision you make about DC. If it's happening this bad now, it's only going to get worse.....
For people that have baseless arguments about how my decision is "bad", I either cite or make up "studies". Just tell her that numerous studies have shown that that system delays reading skills later on. Even if there aren't any studies like that, she's not going to listen to your opinion, so you might as well "fight fire with fire", since she's using information from an infomercial....
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| Posted 5/8/09 7:41 AM |
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krashnburn
I am Batman!
Member since 5/05 4093 total posts
Name:
I'm Batman, I tell you!
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
A) That is not a "friend".
B) You have the right mindset. A 2 year old does not need to read--he needs to be a 2 year old.
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| Posted 5/8/09 7:46 AM |
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Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!
Member since 8/05 14470 total posts
Name:
Veronica
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
Posted by Arieschick29
I think the question should be "How soon is too soon to ditch this so-called friend"?
You don't need anyone in your life to try and tell you how to raise your child and then make you feel bad for the decisions youve made
But that's just IMO
That was my gut reaction too.
I feel so bad for you. I can't imagine a friend doing this to you. You should not be ashamed or have to defend your parenting decisions.
I don't get the whole make your child smarter with products thing. I read to AJ but she rather chew on the book and she's 8months. I read a ton so Im hoping we can read together as she gets older. I think showing our children love and encouragement is the most important thing. Everything else sorta falls into place with that base.
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| Posted 5/8/09 9:31 AM |
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eddiesmommy
best buds!
Member since 5/09 11524 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
Posted by Arieschick29
I think the question should be "How soon is too soon to ditch this so-called friend"?
You don't need anyone in your life to try and tell you how to raise your child and then make you feel bad for the decisions youve made
But that's just IMO
ITA!!!!!!!!!!!!! There is no reason you need to let this "friend" influence you. Youre right to stick to your guns. If moms want to teach their children things early, thats their perogative and fine by me. I personally think that I will let Eddie enjoy being a kid and that there is plenty of time to deal with life's pressures and 2 years old isnt one of them. At least I dont feel its right for my son...to each his own.
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| Posted 5/8/09 9:34 AM |
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kerrycec03
Mom of 2 beautiful boys!!
Member since 6/06 13519 total posts
Name:
Kerry
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
personally I think its a waste of money those "systems". Like most informercials, if the product was "thank good" everyone would use it.
I think you're "friend" needs to bite her tough, but to be fair, I wouldn't have said anything to her like you did (saying I don't need one of those). She probably got defensive after you kinda put down the "system".
Message edited 5/8/2009 9:37:23 AM.
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| Posted 5/8/09 9:37 AM |
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KartveliT
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Member since 1/08 8363 total posts
Name:
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
I think you need to say bye bye to your friend That's just silly. You are a parent and you decide what you want to do with your child If she wants her kids to start reading and writing at the age of 2 that's fine. But she should not be pushing others to do the same.
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| Posted 5/8/09 9:50 AM |
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Bxgell2
Perfection
Member since 5/05 16438 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
Posted by Arieschick29
I think the question should be "How soon is too soon to ditch this so-called friend"?
You don't need anyone in your life to try and tell you how to raise your child and then make you feel bad for the decisions youve made
But that's just IMO
ITA - I would never accept that kind of talk or behavior from a friend. Everyone has a different parenting style and different priorities when it comes to their child, and what's more important is that every child has different needs and different temperments. You do what YOu feel comfortable doing - there is no right or wrong answer to this, it is ony what you feel is best for yourself, your child, and what's important to you in raising him.
Personally I think 2 is a little young. The fact is, all of our kids will be reading by the time they are in 1st grade. Pushing them to start earlier isn't going to make them any more intelligent, but instead, might just put so much pressure on them that they will associate learning with pressure and develop a poor attitude towards it. At 2, the best way to learn and develop is through free play, at least that is what I've read, and what I believe. They are only children once - let them enjoy it.
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| Posted 5/8/09 9:51 AM |
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pinkandblue
Our family is complete, maybe
Member since 9/05 32436 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
Posted by Arieschick29
I think the question should be "How soon is too soon to ditch this so-called friend"?
You don't need anyone in your life to try and tell you how to raise your child and then make you feel bad for the decisions youve made
But that's just IMO
 you need to be more selective with your friends, I could NEVER be friends with someone like that
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| Posted 5/8/09 10:06 AM |
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eroxgirl
My Loves
Member since 5/05 15697 total posts
Name:
Rebecca
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
Posted by Arieschick29
I think the question should be "How soon is too soon to ditch this so-called friend"?
You don't need anyone in your life to try and tell you how to raise your child and then make you feel bad for the decisions youve made
But that's just IMO
ITA!!! She's not a friend - friends don't act that way. She's a moron if she thinks you're not interested in your child's education based on this one product.
My DH is all about that "Your Child Can Read" thing. I'm not... I read at 3 years old because everyone and their brother read to me when I was little, but I had a genuine interest in books as does my DD. She'll probably read early because she always has a book in her hand and ASKS us to read to her all the time at only 15 months. But if she doesn't read early, then she'll learn in school with a majority of other kids. I'm not going to worry about it.
Education is very important, of course, but kids need to be kids - they need to play and have fun and enjoy themselves without pressure, especially at this young age. They have the rest of their lives to read and learn and study.
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| Posted 5/8/09 10:19 AM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
Posted by Arieschick29
I think the question should be "How soon is too soon to ditch this so-called friend"?
You don't need anyone in your life to try and tell you how to raise your child and then make you feel bad for the decisions youve made
But that's just IMO
I completely agree.
If you're asking if it's possible to teach a baby to read - yes it is. They can memorize sight words & you can have your child reading by 2-3 years old if you're up for it. I read the books & did the cards with Joseph but it fell to the wayside. I know if I would have kept up with it, he would have been reading at an early age. Think about it this way - there is a reason a very young child can identify a McDonald's sign & know it's McDonald's. It's advertising. What you essentially do is advertise words (or whatever else you want them to learn - states, birds, chemistry symbols, etc.) to your child.
Thanks to School House Rock, I knew the Preamble to the Constitution & how a bill became a law before I actually knew what the Constitution or a Bill was.
There is a whole component into having a smart kid that people don't consider. I was speaking to a mom whose son is in Gifted & Talented. She told me they were handed out a ditto on the first day of class which explained that being gifted & talented mirrors a learning disability. I found it fascinating.
There is a social factor to consider. I know a family of 3 girls. All could read at an early age (2.5, 3 years old) - all have social issues. They put a lot of stock into being smart & made no bones about telling everyone how smart they are.
Here's the thing, you can be a genius. A true genius & know all there is to know but if you don't work hard & learn to strive, it becomes your downfall. I see it with my own son when he tells me he's smart & we counter with "you need to work hard - if you're smart, then you'll realize that."
Message edited 5/8/2009 11:52:49 AM.
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| Posted 5/8/09 11:51 AM |
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Goldi0218
My miracles!
Member since 12/05 23902 total posts
Name:
Leslie
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
I was reading WITH COMPREHENSION (which to me as an educator is MUCH more impressive than sight words alone) at 3 years old. I was read to every day. Exposing your child to literature is a great (and IMO the best) start. There were no "programs" that got me there. I am relatively bright and rather literate, but certainly NOT a genius and I do not have social skills issues unless you consider LIF a social issue.
Bottom line, it can be done without a program to put pressure on a parent and a child.
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| Posted 5/8/09 12:03 PM |
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dpli
Daylight savings :)
Member since 5/05 13973 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
I don't know at what age I started reading, 3 or 4 years old, but I know it was before kindergarten and I was 4 when I started kindergarten. My mom had 4 kids, and we are in a 5 year range. I am the third of the bunch. While I am sure we were read to, I know my mom was too busy to spend that much individual time with me to have me read that young. I think it was just because I always had a love of books and still do. My mom actually credited Sesame St. with some of it. I think I just had an aptitude for it and loved to read.
I started reading to my own son at about 3 months. He also loves books and will choose to look through books on his own almost as often as he chooses to play with toys. I don't know if this means he will be an early reader or not, but I think introducing children to books and spending time reading with them definitely helps them learn to read. I don't think anyone needs an expensive program to develop reading skills, but spending time reading and talking about stories will help.
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| Posted 5/8/09 12:36 PM |
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butterfly20
Party of 5 - 2015
Member since 4/06 7390 total posts
Name:
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
Posted by Arieschick29
I think the question should be "How soon is too soon to ditch this so-called friend"?
You don't need anyone in your life to try and tell you how to raise your child and then make you feel bad for the decisions youve made
But that's just IMO
totally agree... if shes like this now she's just going to get worse at it. No need to have un necessary grief from her
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| Posted 5/8/09 12:40 PM |
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nancy6485
So in love
Member since 10/05 3363 total posts
Name:
Nancy
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
Posted by Arieschick29
I think the question should be "How soon is too soon to ditch this so-called friend"?
You don't need anyone in your life to try and tell you how to raise your child and then make you feel bad for the decisions youve made
But that's just IMO
my thoughts exaclty! i saw that infomercial a few weeks back
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| Posted 5/8/09 12:43 PM |
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Palebride
I am an amazing bakist
Member since 5/05 13673 total posts
Name:
Lori
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Re: Reading and your child (kinda vent).......
I am an English teacher and an avid reader. The only trophies I ever got in my life were for Summer Reading. I LOVE LOVE LOVE books and reading.
That being said, Lily will develop at her own pace. She loves books now. She pretends to read them. I read to her. But I REFUSE to push her to read. I want her to enjoy reading....not do it so she can read sooner than the kid next door!
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| Posted 5/8/09 12:45 PM |
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