Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

after 2 pregnancy tests, dh and i just found out we are pregnant!
I have a drs. appointment tomorrow to confirm as well.

This baby comes unexpected and we have all sorts of emotions!
We were planning on ttc possibly around the end of next year or 2010. we are almost approaching out 1 yr anni.
and never lived together. we were looking forward to some us time. as well as getting our finances together and traveling etc.

i am a ball of emotions. one minute i tell myself im ready and that we'll be ok and the next minute i am frightened to death!

please help me! i dont want to go through this pregnancy doubtful and unhappy.
i feel horrible that i am unhappy at times.

there are so many people ttc that would kill to be me. i dont deserve this blessing

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

please someone! help!
any advice??
where do i start, what do i expect?

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

no advice really, but wanted to give you these-

you will be okay.. having a baby is the most amazing thing in the world and once you have yours you will not be able to imagine living without him/her.

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

First of, take a deep breath!!! Congrats on getting your BFP! It's a wonderful blessing. This board can be your lifeline if you let it. All the girls here are amazing and helpful. There isn't a question that is dumb or any topic that is "TMI". This is a great resource for you and hopefully can help you get through your pregnancy. As for your personal situation, you'll find many people come up with surprise positive pregnancy tests. It's not something to be dreaded, it's something to be celebrated. If you look at it from that perspective, you might feel a little more relaxed about the whole situation Good luck at your doc's appointment. Let us know how everything turns out!!!

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

Thats a difficult situation to reply to, because those are emotions that are your own. Im not sure of the lingo...are you married?
All I can say is that pregnancy is scary and exciting...I think for everyone...especially the first time around. Im not sure the fear ever goes away...me and my husband were planning having a child, and it happened immidiately. Then you think...should we have waited longer...this..that. I have a million questions and emotions, but most of all I am truly excited because the truth of the matter is that it is a blessing. If you wait until your finances are in order or your life is in order...you will be waiting forever. DOnt think your life will end...you can still travel and do the things you want to do, but now it will 3X the fun.
Wait until tomorrow for confirmation, but in the meantime work out your emotions together.
The best of luck. Keep us posted.

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

i just want to thank you girls so much.
the little words of advice and encouragement really help!
its all i really need.

I feel so bad my husband ad i had all sorts of emotions from excitement to scared out of our minds and when we openly spoke i communicated that i wasnt happy.
HORRIBLE i know!! i hate myself for even saying it or thinking it.

anyhow, then he felt bad and upset. he is excited but wanted me to have the moment in my life when i was ready mentally, physically- and enjoy the baby making process.

anyhow, i really believe i will be happy. this is a blessing! i know! and i know my life will change for the better.

i just go back and forth from happy to scared.

i dont even know who is going to watch the baby when it comes??!?!? how does everyone do it?
we both need to work....

anyhow, thank you so much. please keep telling me i will be ok! it really helps!! you have no idea!

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

Just take a breathe. You will be fine. Enjoy the 9 months it is truly a mircacle that you will enjoy .

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

just spoke to dh, he is on his way home. he was being so cute.

it really helps!!!

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

Pregnancy lasts 9 months for a reason

You will be a great mom, and you have 9 months to get everything together, you dont have to worry about any of it now. Take care of yourself.

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

Posted by momtobe08

i dont deserve this blessing

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

Once you see the baby's heartbeat for the first time your heart will melt. I'm of the feeling that everything in life happens when its meant to, so even though you might think you aren't ready everything will be ok.

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

thank you girls!! this means so much!!

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

my dh is younger than me, so we had to ttc earlier than he would have preferred, becuase of my age....

he said to me 'I don't think I'm ready yet'.... and I said 'heh, neither do I!' (I'm 36).

I think it's really common to have those emotions..... for the first several weeks, it felt surreal.... and I didn't know what to think.... but by this point (I'm 18.5 weeks) DH and I are getting excited.... the idea of parenthood is growing on us big time....

you'll be fine! just count your blessings... While it wasn't planned, you ARE married and happy, and you both did want to become parents in the near future.... your little one will be very loved and lucky

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

Dont feel bad you are not the only one who had mixed emotions when you got your BFP.
DH and I weren't trying, when we got our BFP I cried even though a part of me was so excited! Its a very overwhelming feeling.
But fast forward 1 year and my life is amazing with my DS. and DH who was very reluctant to even discuss TTC and who didnt beleive I was pregnant until about 5 months in, is just in love with his little buddy.
Somehow you work it all out, and as someone else stated there is reason pregnancy lasts 9 months it gives you time to adjust.

Feel free to turn here with any questions, concerns or just shoulders to cry on, between all of us I am sure someone will have been where you are or felt what you are feeling! You are not alone!

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

im so glad youre feeling better about it now.

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

I can tell you that your finances will never come into play..always want more or do more for the baby.
My brother just filled for Bankrupsy this year and they have a baby on the way..will it be tight? yes, can they do it? yes. They will make great parents.
I wish you luck and of course you were not really trying but consider it a blessing and try and enjoy..all will always work itself out.
My best to you and your DH

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

I just found out Monday that i am pregnant too! We were filled with the same emotions, scared yet happy, nervous and thinking about how we are going to afford this, etc. We've discussed this together and we know this is a blessing, life always has a way of throwing things at you at the least expected time. You all will be fine and remeber you will be great parents! Forum mail me if you want to talk!

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

Congratulations! I think we are never given more than we can handle and that things happen for a reason, even if we don't know it yet. We're here for you!

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

you ladies are a Godsend! you just cant believe how much you are helping.
each day gets better than the one before.
i really take your words to heart!

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

You are not alone. We had found out 4 days after our wedding that we were unexpectedly pregnant!!!!!! There were a lot of mixed emotions (especially on his part, we had a plan....we thought) but I would say that within 3 days nothing else mattered. I felt guilty about some of the things I was thinking but it's normal! That pregnancy ended in a m/c and it was devestating. I am now pregnant again and there are still things to fear, it is a huge responsibility and change but I know how worth it it's going to be and I just look at everyone else who does it and say to myself, if they can, I can, and everything will work out.

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

1st off, God thinks you DO deserve this blessing. Secondly, COngratulations!!! I think it is perfectly normal to feel like this. There will never be a "perfect" time to ttc especially when it come to finances and such... Relax and be happy. Wait until you go to your first sono at @ 8 weeks and you actually see the little bean and little tiny heartbeat....trust me nothing else will matter at all

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

I'm glad your feeling better!
My pregnancy wasn't expected as well...but I figure everything happens for a reason!
I hope you have a healthy and happy 9 months!

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

first- calm down.
even those of us who tried for MONTHS to get pregnant were scared and doubtful when it actually happened.
It's a huge life change and thankfully pregnancy is 9 months (well, 10) and you have some time for you & DH to get used to the idea of it all.

First think you want to do is make an appt with your doctor- they'll probably want to see you when you are 8 weeks- there is nothing they can do for you before then.

Also- go and get some prenatal vitamins- you can get them over the counter at cvs or walgreens.

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

My pregnancy was not planned either, and my BF and I are not married, though we do live together. We were planning and trying in about a year, but I really do believe things happen for a reason. We were both immediately happy and scared. My fear subsided a little more quickly, but I am older than him and his fear starting increasing the first few weeks of my pregnancy. However, as soon as we saw the heartbeat and our little baby on the screen, we were both crying and all the real fear seemed to go away.

Re: Just found im pregnant and i am scared out of my mind! please help

I just wanted to congratulate you on your BFP and add that while DH and I did live together for 5 years prior to our wedding and we knew we'd try to get PG right away, at our ages we were convinced (not by medical professional but by moronic people) that it would take at least a year so we thought we had that time. We just got married in July. Mind you too when we started trying DH was the #2 sales rep with his company in the country and #1 in the region. One would think we were in "perfect position" for TTC and to think it would take about a year only made it more relaxing.

Ahh... the best laid plans of mice and men...

Well... we got PG on the first try, DH lost his job due to corporate downsizing (no fault of his own, the company laid off 60% of their sales force) the day before my 12 week sono. DH has since found another job, but the base is much lower than his previous position with higher commission potential, but being he's only a month into it we have no idea yet what this means for us.

With all this said, I'm being induced on Sunday and still freak out at the thought that we won't be alone anymore, that we can't pick up and go whenever we want, that my life is going to totally change (and even that I'll actually have to wake up early for work, can't just keep hitting snooze). However, I also know in my heart that I love our baby very much and that he/she is so wanted and already so celebrated by our families and friends. I know it sounds almost BSish, but seriously I'm realizing that love for your DH and your baby will get you guys through. You may not have all the high end stuff that comes and goes, but you'll have eachother and that can last you forever. Lean on family and friends for support (once you are out about your PG). Know who will encourage you and know who will drive you crazy and stay clear of the latter. Know you have been blessed and it will get you through everything... don't feel you are undeserving just b/c it came "easier" than it may for others. I too know of many who are painfully TTC, the best you can do is wish those folks the same blessing.

That's the best advice I can offer and I hope it makes sense. I wish you a very happy and healthy 9 months!