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pinkandblue
Our family is complete, maybe
Member since 9/05 32436 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by BaseballWidow
Posted by Mikismom
I don't think you should "worry" about what you say
Trust me, I won't! 
perfect.... 
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Posted 3/10/09 2:10 PM  |
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Lizzie217
LIF Adolescent
Member since 1/09 611 total posts
Name:
elizabeth
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by MrsFab
i dont really know if this board is ok for me to be on- we are married 5 months and just not wanting kids yet- but I am here, cause I think its where I fit best right now
but anyhow, I just wanted to say my aunt never had children and I can remember her crying over things that people said to her about not wanting children. Its terrible and not right for anyone to make someone feel like that.
I'm in the same boat...I were are currently childless families,,,when I'm preggo I will leave. 
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:11 PM |
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by BlovesE
I'm in the same boat...I were are currently childless families,,,when I'm preggo I will leave.
If/when I get preggo I'll be on my merry way too! But for now it's nice to stay!
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:16 PM |
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HeathKernandez
Our Ron is an awesome Ron
Member since 4/07 9091 total posts
Name:
baby fish mouth
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by BaseballWidow
Posted by BlovesE
I'm in the same boat...I were are currently childless families,,,when I'm preggo I will leave.
If/when I get preggo I'll be on my merry way too! But for now it's nice to stay!
This is where I am confused. NFR is a NON FAMILY RELATED board... where most of my 'non parent' LIF friends hang out.
Actually *I* hang out there more, b/c to be honest I dont have much in common with anyone on the parenting board b/c my kid is almost in college
I thought this board was for people who just never wanted children to express their frustrations and experiences?
If you are going to have children eventually, why not just post on NFR?
(I don't mean this to criticize...I'm honestly confused b/c I see a BIG difference btwn those who don't have kids YET and those who don't want kids)
you know?
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:19 PM |
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skinny
3 boys and a princess!
Member since 11/08 8178 total posts
Name:
Momma
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by Mikismom
Posted by Ophelia
Posted by DirtyBlonde
honestly, i'm surprised that it took this long.
me too in a way.
I am assuming I won't be welcomed on the pregnancy or parenting boards now.
whatever.
why would you say that? That is not true
all are welcome, even the "non-parents"
Yeah, but not really. "Non-parents" don't know what it's like to be parents so we really wouldn't fit in over there. The same, in reverse, is true of this board.
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:21 PM |
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Cheeks24
Living a dream
Member since 1/08 8589 total posts
Name:
Cheeks
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by KeithHernandez
Posted by BaseballWidow
Posted by BlovesE
I'm in the same boat...I were are currently childless families,,,when I'm preggo I will leave.
If/when I get preggo I'll be on my merry way too! But for now it's nice to stay!
This is where I am confused. NFR is a NON FAMILY RELATED board... where most of my 'non parent' LIF friends hang out.
Actually *I* hang out there more, b/c to be honest I dont have much in common with anyone on the parenting board b/c my kid is almost in college
I thought this board was for people who just never wanted children to express their frustrations and experiences?
If you are going to have children eventually, why not just post on NFR?
(I don't mean this to criticize...I'm honestly confused b/c I see a BIG difference btwn those who don't have kids YET and those who don't want kids)
you know?
Well to me parenting is parenting only so why would someone post something that has nothing to do with parenting there? That's why I think NFR was created. This board is similar to NFR, but a place where non parents can hang out too.
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:24 PM |
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greenfreak
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Member since 9/06 11483 total posts
Name:
greenfreak
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
I just want the drama to stay where it belongs. On NFR on Friday afternoons.
Seriously though, if this board gets ruined because of drama and flaming, I'm gonna lose my goddamn mind. I have been AVOIDING threads and entire boards for that reason! Let me have this one board! Pleeeeease!!
I deserve a safe haven, as does everyone else, childless or childmore.
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:24 PM |
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MeeshMosh
last month on leave!
Member since 6/08 4551 total posts
Name:
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by KeithHernandez
(I don't mean this to criticize...I'm honestly confused b/c I see a BIG difference btwn those who don't have kids YET and those who don't want kids)
you know?
i see what you are saying & i thought the same thing when the board was created
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:25 PM |
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DonnaJoe708
Hello
Member since 5/05 4002 total posts
Name:
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by Mikismom
Posted by BaseballWidow
Posted by MrsM-6-7-08
but we have to be worried each and everytime we say something that the parents are going to be so highly offended then really what is the point.
No, see, we DON"T have to be worried b/c this is OUR place and if others want to come and read and comment they have to get that they are in the minority and we will continue to express ourselves and support each other. We are not here to support parents, only other CHILDLESS families.
see, that is where I disagree...why be so divisive? Why not support each other, whether you be childfree or parents?
I agree with Stephanie. Why can't we just support one another regardless of whether or not we have children?
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:25 PM |
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by KeithHernandez
Posted by BaseballWidow
Posted by BlovesE
I'm in the same boat...I were are currently childless families,,,when I'm preggo I will leave.
If/when I get preggo I'll be on my merry way too! But for now it's nice to stay!
This is where I am confused. NFR is a NON FAMILY RELATED board... where most of my 'non parent' LIF friends hang out.
Actually *I* hang out there more, b/c to be honest I dont have much in common with anyone on the parenting board b/c my kid is almost in college
I thought this board was for people who just never wanted children to express their frustrations and experiences?
If you are going to have children eventually, why not just post on NFR?
(I don't mean this to criticize...I'm honestly confused b/c I see a BIG difference btwn those who don't have kids YET and those who don't want kids)
you know?
Honestly, I am not childless by choice. I would LOVE a brood of kids. It may never haoppen for us though. BUT, that said, DH and I are a family, as I have come to learn, so NFR doen't fit for all things either. The whole purpose of this board was two fold:
1. To meet other childless couples
2. To talk about common interests/struggles of living in a "family (meaning with children) centered" society
Some are here and never want kids, others do. Fact is whatever the reason we have more in common with each other then with families with children..regardless of the kids' ages.
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:29 PM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by DonnaJoe708
I agree with Stephanie. Why can't we just support one another regardless of whether or not we have children?
you can't. b/c you can't have feelings that are contrary or "offensive" to someone else and express them.
I think it's funny that NOT one of the "mothers' that got upset with me instead tried to comfort me, or assuage my fears about pregnancy, since I thought I made my love and wonderment of childbearing just as clear as my fears of it.
but instead, people took it to heart, got offended...and of course, I am mean unfeeling and whatever else.
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:30 PM |
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MissRadiant
Happily Ever After
Member since 9/08 2534 total posts
Name:
N
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by KeithHernandez
I thought this board was for people who just never wanted children to express their frustrations and experiences?
If you are going to have children eventually, why not just post on NFR?
(I don't mean this to criticize...I'm honestly confused b/c I see a BIG difference btwn those who don't have kids YET and those who don't want kids)
you know?
Wait now I am confused I thought this board was for people that did not have children. No matter what their reasons are. I feel more comfortable speaking to people that do not have kids then to those that do as we can relate to each other more. I want kids in a couple of years but not right now.
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:30 PM |
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MrsFab
this is bliss.......
Member since 10/08 1234 total posts
Name:
Mb
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by KeithHernandez
This is where I am confused. NFR is a NON FAMILY RELATED board... where most of my 'non parent' LIF friends hang out.
Actually *I* hang out there more, b/c to be honest I dont have much in common with anyone on the parenting board b/c my kid is almost in college
I thought this board was for people who just never wanted children to express their frustrations and experiences?
If you are going to have children eventually, why not just post on NFR?
(I don't mean this to criticize...I'm honestly confused b/c I see a BIG difference btwn those who don't have kids YET and those who don't want kids)
you know?
my opinion- nfr stands for not family related- I consider DH and I a family- at some point we will add to that family (hopefully) but nevertheless, I feel like this board has the potential to address things that relate to our relationship as it stands now. When I first came on here, I was glad to see discussion about traveling without your spouse and what other people have been told because they dont have/dont want kids- and I have been told some horrible things because we dont want kids right now- called selfish selfcentered, etc because I am "31 & not getting any younger" and I guess I felt like this was somewhere that I could talk about that stuff.
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:30 PM |
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MrsFab
this is bliss.......
Member since 10/08 1234 total posts
Name:
Mb
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by Ophelia
Posted by DonnaJoe708
I agree with Stephanie. Why can't we just support one another regardless of whether or not we have children?
you can't. b/c you can't have feelings that are contrary or "offensive" to someone else and express them.
I think it's funny that NOT one of the "mothers' that got upset with me instead tried to comfort me, or assuage my fears about pregnancy, since I thought I made my love and wonderment of childbearing just as clear as my fears of it.
but instead, people took it to heart, got offended...and of course, I am mean unfeeling and whatever else.
that is a good point, it might have been helpful if someone sought to educate instead of judge
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:32 PM |
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DonnaJoe708
Hello
Member since 5/05 4002 total posts
Name:
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by Ophelia
Posted by DonnaJoe708
I agree with Stephanie. Why can't we just support one another regardless of whether or not we have children?
you can't. b/c you can't have feelings that are contrary or "offensive" to someone else and express them.
I think it's funny that NOT one of the "mothers' that got upset with me instead tried to comfort me, or assuage my fears about pregnancy, since I thought I made my love and wonderment of childbearing just as clear as my fears of it.
but instead, people took it to heart, got offended...and of course, I am mean unfeeling and whatever else.
For what it's worth, I don't think you're mean or unfeeling! 
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:33 PM |
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HeathKernandez
Our Ron is an awesome Ron
Member since 4/07 9091 total posts
Name:
baby fish mouth
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by MrsFab
Posted by KeithHernandez
This is where I am confused. NFR is a NON FAMILY RELATED board... where most of my 'non parent' LIF friends hang out.
Actually *I* hang out there more, b/c to be honest I dont have much in common with anyone on the parenting board b/c my kid is almost in college
I thought this board was for people who just never wanted children to express their frustrations and experiences?
If you are going to have children eventually, why not just post on NFR?
(I don't mean this to criticize...I'm honestly confused b/c I see a BIG difference btwn those who don't have kids YET and those who don't want kids)
you know?
my opinion- nfr stands for not family related- I consider DH and I a family- at some point we will add to that family (hopefully) but nevertheless, I feel like this board has the potential to address things that relate to our relationship as it stands now.
but then, wouldn't that be 'relationships?'
hahaha you know?
I know this board was spawn from the conversation about people who were childless by choice, which is where my confusion lies. (lies? lay?)
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:36 PM |
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Celt
~~~~~~~~~~
Member since 4/08 7758 total posts
Name:
colette
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
I can just imagine the  had anyone tried to offer an alternate view. Honestly that's a bit disingenuous. Please don't think I'm offended by it, I really don't get offended by anything on LIF (nor did I on LIW) really, I'm just pointing out that a simple pronoun can make a world of difference...
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:38 PM |
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HeathKernandez
Our Ron is an awesome Ron
Member since 4/07 9091 total posts
Name:
baby fish mouth
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by Ophelia
I think it's funny that NOT one of the "mothers' that got upset with me instead tried to comfort me, or assuage my fears about pregnancy, since I thought I made my love and wonderment of childbearing just as clear as my fears of it.
OMG I TOTALLY WAS GOING TO... but then I thought it would sound too snarky b/c I was griping about the identity loss comment and didn't want to cause any more trouble than I already have.
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:38 PM |
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skinny
3 boys and a princess!
Member since 11/08 8178 total posts
Name:
Momma
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by KeithHernandez
Posted by MrsFab
Posted by KeithHernandez
This is where I am confused. NFR is a NON FAMILY RELATED board... where most of my 'non parent' LIF friends hang out.
Actually *I* hang out there more, b/c to be honest I dont have much in common with anyone on the parenting board b/c my kid is almost in college
I thought this board was for people who just never wanted children to express their frustrations and experiences?
If you are going to have children eventually, why not just post on NFR?
(I don't mean this to criticize...I'm honestly confused b/c I see a BIG difference btwn those who don't have kids YET and those who don't want kids)
you know?
my opinion- nfr stands for not family related- I consider DH and I a family- at some point we will add to that family (hopefully) but nevertheless, I feel like this board has the potential to address things that relate to our relationship as it stands now.
but then, wouldn't that be 'relationships?'
hahaha you know?
I know this board was spawn from the conversation about people who were childless by choice, which is where my confusion lies. (lies? lay?)
Not necessarily. I consider DH and I to be our own family and there are things specific to a family of 2 that wouldn't necessarily fit on the other boards. Personally, I think it's nice to have a place for "Families of 2."
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:42 PM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by colette
I can just imagine the had anyone tried to offer an alternate view. Honestly that's a bit disingenuous. Please don't think I'm offended by it, I really don't get offended by anything on LIF (nor did I on LIW) really, I'm just pointing out that a simple pronoun can make a world of difference...
I think it's a bit much for you to presume you know me at all enough to assume I am being disingenuous.
I guess I could have used a pronoun, but it just wasn't how my thoughts came out.
now....for the snark...next time, I'll fm you a draft for review. 
I am not really a rolleyes kind of girl. but again, you don't know me well enough to assume that either.
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:42 PM |
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by KeithHernandez
but then, wouldn't that be 'relationships?'
hahaha you know?
I know this board was spawn from the conversation about people who were childless by choice, which is where my confusion lies. (lies? lay?)
But relationships board often has extended family issues and issues with our parents/in-laws, so not just for "childless families"
Just for the record, I know for a fact that this board's concept was talked about a while ago by someone NOT childless by choice and it just seems like it took hearing from a lot of people to get it up and running.
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:44 PM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by KeithHernandez
Posted by Ophelia
I think it's funny that NOT one of the "mothers' that got upset with me instead tried to comfort me, or assuage my fears about pregnancy, since I thought I made my love and wonderment of childbearing just as clear as my fears of it.
OMG I TOTALLY WAS GOING TO... but then I thought it would sound too snarky b/c I was griping about the identity loss comment and didn't want to cause any more trouble than I already have.
you know me...if I think it's snarky, I just fm you to confirm 
pep talks work wonders. 
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:44 PM |
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greenfreak
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Member since 9/06 11483 total posts
Name:
greenfreak
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by Ophelia
Posted by DonnaJoe708
I agree with Stephanie. Why can't we just support one another regardless of whether or not we have children?
you can't. b/c you can't have feelings that are contrary or "offensive" to someone else and express them.
I think it's funny that NOT one of the "mothers' that got upset with me instead tried to comfort me, or assuage my fears about pregnancy, since I thought I made my love and wonderment of childbearing just as clear as my fears of it.
but instead, people took it to heart, got offended...and of course, I am mean unfeeling and whatever else.
You know as well as I do, when someone feels defensive, their first instinct is not to comfort the person that made them feel that way.
I was with you until the end with the comment about husbands not seeing their wives the same way again. I can see where that would upset someone. You really can't see how that could be taken personally?
Just as you want them to see past their initial reaction, so should we. We should consider that maybe if it had been worded differently, it wouldn't have caused an uproar. If that's not your style and you feel like you're censoring yourself, that's your right to post what you want. But you will get varying reactions to that, and you have to expect that also.
And at this point, it's affecting everyone here, an entire brand-new board that we're all thankful for. Differing opinions or not, this will turn into a Childless by Choice versus Parenting debacle if we let this continue.
Can't we all just get along?
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:45 PM |
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LightUpOurLife
Totally in love
Member since 8/06 12785 total posts
Name:
Bonnie-Jean
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by KeithHernandez
If you are going to have children eventually, why not just post on NFR?
IMO this wouldn't go over so well on NFR or Parenting or Relationships KWIM?
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:48 PM |
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HeathKernandez
Our Ron is an awesome Ron
Member since 4/07 9091 total posts
Name:
baby fish mouth
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Re: it was only a matter of time.....
Posted by greenfreak
Posted by Ophelia
Posted by DonnaJoe708
I agree with Stephanie. Why can't we just support one another regardless of whether or not we have children?
you can't. b/c you can't have feelings that are contrary or "offensive" to someone else and express them.
I think it's funny that NOT one of the "mothers' that got upset with me instead tried to comfort me, or assuage my fears about pregnancy, since I thought I made my love and wonderment of childbearing just as clear as my fears of it.
but instead, people took it to heart, got offended...and of course, I am mean unfeeling and whatever else.
You know as well as I do, when someone feels defensive, their first instinct is not to comfort the person that made them feel that way.
I was with you until the end with the comment about husbands not seeing their wives the same way again. I can see where that would upset someone. You really can't see how that could be taken personally?
Just as you want them to see past their initial reaction, so should we. We should consider that maybe if it had been worded differently, it wouldn't have caused an uproar. If that's not your style and you feel like you're censoring yourself, that's your right to post what you want. But you will get varying reactions to that, and you have to expect that also.
And at this point, it's affecting everyone here, an entire brand-new board that we're all thankful for. Differing opinions or not, this will turn into a Childless by Choice versus Parenting debacle if we let this continue.
Can't we all just get along?
You know, there was an interesting conversation on the radio about this. The DJs were talking about how after a husband watches his wife give birth, how could he ever see her as an attractive woman etc etc. And while I thought it was a RIDICULOUS THOUGHT, I *could* see where they were coming from.
I guess, for many husbands, they look beyond that and see the beauty in that their wives just gave them a child and I couldn't imagine a husband not loving her 1000 times more because of it..
Now with that SAID, I am in NO MEANS saying that husbands of wives who don't have children don't love them like this... I just feel like I need to make that disclaimer... lol
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| Posted 3/10/09 2:50 PM |
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