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iwed2005
LIF Adult
Member since 3/06 1389 total posts
Name:
Julie
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If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
i don't mean to pry...and this is not to try to ambush or change your mind. actually i ask because i am very tossed about "celebrating" halloween. for me it has no real value and i really don't see any purpose, no offense to those who do. I am just wondering if you don't how do you explain it to your kids why the other childeren are wearing costumes and everything else that goes along with halloween.
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Posted 10/22/09 1:06 PM  |
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MrsRbk
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Member since 1/06 19197 total posts
Name:
Michelle
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
My daughter is only 8.5 months old, so I don't need to explain anything just yet. However, if/when the time comes, we will explain it to her the same way we will explain why we don't celebrate Christmas
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:10 PM |
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iwed2005
LIF Adult
Member since 3/06 1389 total posts
Name:
Julie
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Posted by MrsRbk
My daughter is only 8.5 months old, so I don't need to explain anything just yet. However, if/when the time comes, we will explain it to her the same way we will explain why we don't celebrate Christmas
religious?? or who my daughters are 3 and 1. My 3yr old is very inquisitive so i want to approach this correctly.
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:12 PM |
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ChrisDee
My Girls
Member since 11/06 9543 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
I do celebrate but I can tell you there is a little boy in Jordan's class that does not. I feel bad for him, when we have the fall party(at school) he has to either go home early , sit at a desk in the hall, or sit with the principal.  He is one of 2 children in the grade that does not celebrate. I know this does not make him happy(I have seen it with my own eyes). While I realize there are certain people that do not celebrate, it is a tough spot do be in when they are in a public school. I teach my daughters that it is a fun day to dress up and be with friends and there is NO real meaning. JMHO
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:13 PM |
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MrsRbk
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Member since 1/06 19197 total posts
Name:
Michelle
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Posted by iwed2005
Posted by MrsRbk
My daughter is only 8.5 months old, so I don't need to explain anything just yet. However, if/when the time comes, we will explain it to her the same way we will explain why we don't celebrate Christmas
religious?? or who my daughters are 3 and 1. My 3yr old is very inquisitive so i want to approach this correctly.
Yes, we do not celebrate christian holidays.
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:14 PM |
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MrsRbk
<3 <3 <3 <3
Member since 1/06 19197 total posts
Name:
Michelle
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Posted by ChrisDee
I do celebrate but I can tell you there is a little boy in Jordan's class that does not. I feel bad for him, when we have the fall party(at school) he has to either go home early , sit at a desk in the hall, or sit with the principal. He is one of 2 children in the grade that does not celebrate. I know this does not make him happy(I have seen it with my own eyes). While I realize there are certain people that do not celebrate, it is a tough spot do be in when they are in a public school. I teach my daughters that it is a fun day to dress up and be with friends and there is NO real meaning. JMHO
IDK, I went to public school and never felt left out, or "bad" because I didn't celebrate non-jewish holidays. But I do understand alot of kids do feel bad. But I think to say that it's a tough spot to be in when you are in public school is not entirely fair/accurate to say.
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:15 PM |
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iwed2005
LIF Adult
Member since 3/06 1389 total posts
Name:
Julie
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Posted by ChrisDee
I do celebrate but I can tell you there is a little boy in Jordan's class that does not. I feel bad for him, when we have the fall party(at school) he has to either go home early , sit at a desk in the hall, or sit with the principal. He is one of 2 children in the grade that does not celebrate. I know this does not make him happy(I have seen it with my own eyes). While I realize there are certain people that do not celebrate, it is a tough spot do be in when they are in a public school. I teach my daughters that it is a fun day to dress up and be with friends and there is NO real meaning. JMHO
i love fall and celebrating fall. we go apple picking and pumpkin picking but i just don't have to much of an inclination of doing the halloween thing. see the school thing is what gets me when she is in school i don't want her to feel she is missing out.
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:16 PM |
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ChrisDee
My Girls
Member since 11/06 9543 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Posted by MrsRbk
Posted by ChrisDee
I do celebrate but I can tell you there is a little boy in Jordan's class that does not. I feel bad for him, when we have the fall party(at school) he has to either go home early , sit at a desk in the hall, or sit with the principal. He is one of 2 children in the grade that does not celebrate. I know this does not make him happy(I have seen it with my own eyes). While I realize there are certain people that do not celebrate, it is a tough spot do be in when they are in a public school. I teach my daughters that it is a fun day to dress up and be with friends and there is NO real meaning. JMHO
IDK, I went to public school and never felt left out, or "bad" because I didn't celebrate non-jewish holidays. But I do understand alot of kids do feel bad. But I think to say that it's a tough spot to be in when you are in public school is not entirely fair/accurate to say.
I can only speak about my experince and I say it is a tough spot because after speaking to the mom of this little boy(I am the class mom)I tried to make the party about FALL and not Halloween, so maybe he could participate. She told me he has some anger issues towards her about these kinds of things(they do not celebrate anything not even bdays) and it has been hard on him and his brothers and in turn hard on her. Again, this is just my experince.
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:20 PM |
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ChrisDee
My Girls
Member since 11/06 9543 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Posted by iwed2005
Posted by ChrisDee
I do celebrate but I can tell you there is a little boy in Jordan's class that does not. I feel bad for him, when we have the fall party(at school) he has to either go home early , sit at a desk in the hall, or sit with the principal. He is one of 2 children in the grade that does not celebrate. I know this does not make him happy(I have seen it with my own eyes). While I realize there are certain people that do not celebrate, it is a tough spot do be in when they are in a public school. I teach my daughters that it is a fun day to dress up and be with friends and there is NO real meaning. JMHO
i love fall and celebrating fall. we go apple picking and pumpkin picking but i just don't have to much of an inclination of doing the halloween thing. see the school thing is what gets me when she is in school i don't want her to feel she is missing out.
Last night we had the book fair and Halloween Spooktacular up at school. It was a big deal and all the kids dressed up and played games and contests. Jordan has so excited about it, that I just could not imagine telling her she could not go when all her friends are.
This is just my opinion and do not mean any disrespect to anyone and their beliefs.
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:23 PM |
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iwed2005
LIF Adult
Member since 3/06 1389 total posts
Name:
Julie
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Posted by ChrisDee
Posted by iwed2005
Posted by ChrisDee
I do celebrate but I can tell you there is a little boy in Jordan's class that does not. I feel bad for him, when we have the fall party(at school) he has to either go home early , sit at a desk in the hall, or sit with the principal. He is one of 2 children in the grade that does not celebrate. I know this does not make him happy(I have seen it with my own eyes). While I realize there are certain people that do not celebrate, it is a tough spot do be in when they are in a public school. I teach my daughters that it is a fun day to dress up and be with friends and there is NO real meaning. JMHO
i love fall and celebrating fall. we go apple picking and pumpkin picking but i just don't have to much of an inclination of doing the halloween thing. see the school thing is what gets me when she is in school i don't want her to feel she is missing out.
Last night we had the book fair and Halloween Spooktacular up at school. It was a big deal and all the kids dressed up and played games and contests. Jordan has so excited about it, that I just could not imagine telling her she could not go when all her friends are.
This is just my opinion and do not mean any disrespect to anyone and their beliefs.
no offense taken. i posed the question because i wanted to get an idea of how ppl handle the situation.
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:25 PM |
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EricaAlt
LIF Adult
Member since 7/08 22665 total posts
Name:
Erica
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Posted by MrsRbk
Posted by ChrisDee
I do celebrate but I can tell you there is a little boy in Jordan's class that does not. I feel bad for him, when we have the fall party(at school) he has to either go home early , sit at a desk in the hall, or sit with the principal. He is one of 2 children in the grade that does not celebrate. I know this does not make him happy(I have seen it with my own eyes). While I realize there are certain people that do not celebrate, it is a tough spot do be in when they are in a public school. I teach my daughters that it is a fun day to dress up and be with friends and there is NO real meaning. JMHO
IDK, I went to public school and never felt left out, or "bad" because I didn't celebrate non-jewish holidays. But I do understand alot of kids do feel bad. But I think to say that it's a tough spot to be in when you are in public school is not entirely fair/accurate to say.
That's how I feel... I LOVE Xmas trees, the colors, movies, etc... but I don't celebrate it. Although I always dated non-Jewish guys b/c I loved celebrating Xmas. 
Now, as I'm older and I'm married to a Jewish guy I actually respect my religion more. I plan on starting fun Hannukah tradions with him so he loves it and doesn't feel left out.
Now that I totally got off what the post was about... I really don't know how to answer. Not EVERYONE does celebrate everything. A girl growing up never celebrated anything. I remember for V-day we gave her cards anyway even though she didn't give it to us. The teacher included her and I remember her being happy about that.
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:27 PM |
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MST9106
My life:)
Member since 6/06 9589 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Julz, I don't know about this one...I mean, I wouldn't really call it "celebrating" Halloween...I look at it more as a masquarade ball/event kind of a thing...yeah the ghouls and the witches and the black cats come with the day, but I don't really look at it as a celebration. Its more of a fun day to dress up and go hunting for free candy I don't know how strongly you feel about it, but I in no shape or form look at it as a celebration...
ETA: I think holding her back from getting dressed up might make her feel bad bc what kid doesn't like to get dressed up, and going Trick or Treating is just fun...maybe later on once the Halloween parties start, etc. you can talk to her and explain how you feel about it...
Message edited 10/22/2009 1:31:49 PM.
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:30 PM |
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iwed2005
LIF Adult
Member since 3/06 1389 total posts
Name:
Julie
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
thanks everyone. i guess the reason i posted the question is because i know that when i my daughter doesn't get dressed up for halloween i am going to be asked "why isn't she dressed up aren't you going to take her trick or treating?" and i was hoping to give a better answer then "no, i don't celebrate halloween". which honestly i think is enough of an answer.
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:30 PM |
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EricaAlt
LIF Adult
Member since 7/08 22665 total posts
Name:
Erica
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Posted by iwed2005
thanks everyone. i guess the reason i posted the question is because i know that when i my daughter doesn't get dressed up for halloween i am going to be asked "why isn't she dressed up aren't you going to take her trick or treating?" and i was hoping to give a better answer then "no, i don't celebrate halloween". which honestly i think is enough of an answer.
I know some pple that aren't celebrating Halloween. Friends of ours that have lived in Israel for so many years are living here now and have a daughter. They never celebrated it b4 and said they're not going to. No one judged them or anything.
If someone can't take the answer "we don't celebrate" and keep asking why... makeup some stupid answer to shut them up. "we had a bad experience once... I don't like to talk about it" then walk away. 
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:33 PM |
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maybesoon
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 5981 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Posted by ChrisDee
I do celebrate but I can tell you there is a little boy in Jordan's class that does not. I feel bad for him, when we have the fall party(at school) he has to either go home early , sit at a desk in the hall, or sit with the principal. He is one of 2 children in the grade that does not celebrate. I know this does not make him happy(I have seen it with my own eyes). While I realize there are certain people that do not celebrate, it is a tough spot do be in when they are in a public school. I teach my daughters that it is a fun day to dress up and be with friends and there is NO real meaning. JMHO
my mother's friends kids ( the same age as my sister and I growing up) were raised this way. they were not able to celebrate certain things and I always felt so terrible for them. I personally think their childhood suffered for it. it's much simpler to let a kid dress up like a pumkin then make them feel excluded from these type of things. Sorry I am sure I'm over stepping a boundry right now but it's cruel to do this to children and make them feel like the odd man out.
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:35 PM |
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MrsRbk
<3 <3 <3 <3
Member since 1/06 19197 total posts
Name:
Michelle
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Posted by EricaAlt
Posted by iwed2005
thanks everyone. i guess the reason i posted the question is because i know that when i my daughter doesn't get dressed up for halloween i am going to be asked "why isn't she dressed up aren't you going to take her trick or treating?" and i was hoping to give a better answer then "no, i don't celebrate halloween". which honestly i think is enough of an answer.
I know some pple that aren't celebrating Halloween. Friends of ours that have lived in Israel for so many years are living here now and have a daughter. They never celebrated it b4 and said they're not going to. No one judged them or anything.
If someone can't take the answer "we don't celebrate" and keep asking why... makeup some stupid answer to shut them up. "we had a bad experience once... I don't like to talk about it" then walk away.
We have Purim to dress up!
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:35 PM |
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SpiceGirl
Dream big
Member since 1/06 2486 total posts
Name:
j
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
I never really put much thought into it (maybe I should?).
It's just a day to dress up and have fun
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:37 PM |
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iwed2005
LIF Adult
Member since 3/06 1389 total posts
Name:
Julie
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Posted by MST9106
Julz, I don't know about this one...I mean, I wouldn't really call it "celebrating" Halloween...I look at it more as a masquarade ball/event kind of a thing...yeah the ghouls and the witches and the black cats come with the day, but I don't really look at it as a celebration. Its more of a fun day to dress up and go hunting for free candy I don't know how strongly you feel about it, but I in no shape or form look at it as a celebration...
ETA: I think holding her back from getting dressed up might make her feel bad bc what kid doesn't like to get dressed up, and going Trick or Treating is just fun...maybe later on once the Halloween parties start, etc. you can talk to her and explain how you feel about it...
i get you but if i never introduce it how will she miss it??? just beint the devils advocates 
i call it a celebration because everyone makes such a big deal about it like if it where a bday or christmas.
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:38 PM |
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EricaAlt
LIF Adult
Member since 7/08 22665 total posts
Name:
Erica
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
That's what I said to our friends... what, you'll dress your DD up for Purim and not Halloween?
I was kidding with them of course.
I remember that in Hebrew school and the groggers!
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:40 PM |
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MST9106
My life:)
Member since 6/06 9589 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Posted by iwed2005
Posted by MST9106
Julz, I don't know about this one...I mean, I wouldn't really call it "celebrating" Halloween...I look at it more as a masquarade ball/event kind of a thing...yeah the ghouls and the witches and the black cats come with the day, but I don't really look at it as a celebration. Its more of a fun day to dress up and go hunting for free candy I don't know how strongly you feel about it, but I in no shape or form look at it as a celebration...
ETA: I think holding her back from getting dressed up might make her feel bad bc what kid doesn't like to get dressed up, and going Trick or Treating is just fun...maybe later on once the Halloween parties start, etc. you can talk to her and explain how you feel about it...
i get you but if i never introduce it how will she miss it??? just beint the devils advocates
i call it a celebration because everyone makes such a big deal about it like if it where a bday or christmas.
It seems that this is very important to you. I never thought of Halloween as a celebration and I never got deep about it. If you want to just say "we don't celebrate Halloween" then go ahead...if somebody asks you why, then just say "we just don't". End of story.
I can't believe that just a few years ago we were having grad school debates and now we're debating Halloween! LOL 
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:45 PM |
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iwed2005
LIF Adult
Member since 3/06 1389 total posts
Name:
Julie
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Posted by MST9106
Posted by iwed2005
Posted by MST9106
Julz, I don't know about this one...I mean, I wouldn't really call it "celebrating" Halloween...I look at it more as a masquarade ball/event kind of a thing...yeah the ghouls and the witches and the black cats come with the day, but I don't really look at it as a celebration. Its more of a fun day to dress up and go hunting for free candy I don't know how strongly you feel about it, but I in no shape or form look at it as a celebration...
ETA: I think holding her back from getting dressed up might make her feel bad bc what kid doesn't like to get dressed up, and going Trick or Treating is just fun...maybe later on once the Halloween parties start, etc. you can talk to her and explain how you feel about it...
i get you but if i never introduce it how will she miss it??? just beint the devils advocates
i call it a celebration because everyone makes such a big deal about it like if it where a bday or christmas.
It seems that this is very important to you. I never thought of Halloween as a celebration and I never got deep about it. If you want to just say "we don't celebrate Halloween" then go ahead...if somebody asks you why, then just say "we just don't". End of story.
I can't believe that just a few years ago we were having grad school debates and now we're debating Halloween! LOL
lmao....so true...hey i will take any form of debate !
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:48 PM |
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brownie
Baby #1 is here!
Member since 11/08 13903 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Posted by SpiceGirl
I never really put much thought into it (maybe I should?).
It's just a day to dress up and have fun
Same here....always thought of it as just a day to dress up in costume and get candy...more for fun than anything...I def am gonna have our DC dress up etc
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:49 PM |
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Michmouse
LIF Adult
Member since 11/07 1260 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
To each his own
I do not understand why people need to know why you choose to celebrate or not. I wouldn't ask.
As a teacher it does break my heart when I see a child who desperately wants to be a part of a celebration and has to go home. I do try to make it possible for everyone to participate in fun filled events though it does take some creativity. Last year we had a character day where kids dressed up as their favorite book character, gave a report on the book and then shared some refreshments afterwards.
Editied for Sp.
Message edited 10/22/2009 1:56:51 PM.
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| Posted 10/22/09 1:56 PM |
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GoldenRod
10 years on LIF!
Member since 11/06 26792 total posts
Name:
Shawn
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
For us, we find it perfectly acceptable to participate in the fun activities of a holiday, without necessarily believing in some of the meaning behind them (by now, the meaning for many holidays has been watered down by society, Hallmark, and Commercialism anyway....).
We don't focus on the fact that it's founded on Gaelic and Pagan rituals to hide from evil spirits that cross over into our world for that night. We focus on dressing up in costumes and getting candy....
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halloween
Halloween has origins in the ancient Gaelic festival known as Samhain (pronounced sow-in or sau-an), which is dervied from Old Irish and means roughly "summer's end".[5] A similar festival was held by the ancient Britons and is known as Calan Gaeaf (pronounced kalan-geyf). The festival of Samhain celebrates the end of the "lighter half" of the year and beginning of the "darker half", and is sometimes[6] regarded as the "Celtic New Year".[7]
The celebration has some elements of a festival of the dead. The ancient Gaels believed that the border between this world and the Otherworld became thin on Samhain, allowing spirits (both harmless and harmful) to pass through. The family's ancestors were honoured and invited home whilst harmful spirits were warded off. It is believed that the need to ward off harmful spirits led to the wearing of costumes and masks. Their purpose was to disguise oneself as a harmful spirit and thus avoid harm. In Scotland the spirits were impersonated by young men dressed in white with masked, veiled or blackened faces.[8][9]
Samhain was also a time to take stock of food supplies and slaughter livestock for winter stores. Bonfires played a large part in the festivities. All other fires were doused and each home lit their hearth from the bonfire. The bones of slaughtered livestock were cast into its flames.[10] Sometimes two bonfires would be built side-by-side, and people and their livestock would walk between them as a cleansing ritual.
Another common practise was divination, which often involved the use of food and drink.
Origin of name
The term Halloween, originally spelled Hallowe’en, is shortened from All Hallows' Even – e'en is a shortening of even, which is a shortening of evening. This is ultimately dervied from the Old English Eallra Halgena ?fen.[11] It is now known as All Saints' Day.
A time of pagan festivities,[12] Popes Gregory III (731–741) and Gregory IV (827–844) tried to supplant it with the Christian holiday (All Saints' Day) by moving it from May 13 to November 1.
In the 800s, the Church measured the day as starting at sunset, in accordance with the Florentine calendar. Although All Saints' Day is now considered to occur one day after Halloween, the two holidays were once celebrated on the same day.
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| Posted 10/22/09 3:43 PM |
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twiceasnice
LIF Adult
Member since 2/08 1126 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you don't "celebrate" halloween quick question
Growing up for me Halloween was always about being creative.
We loved playing dress up but this was a day that I would plan with my mom the most creative costume and we would make it. I still do that now with my costumes and my son's costumes.
The trick or treating part is totally about getting free candy but more so to show off our creation and feel proud.
-- This is just my input because you can make that day be anything you want it to be, so the expectation is there but it is not the same as everyone else's.
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| Posted 10/22/09 3:56 PM |
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