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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by PhyllisNJoe
It’s just DH and I, we eat dinner together every night. If he’s running late, I usually wait (unless it’s super late) and he will do the same for me.
As dysfunctional as my family growing up was, we always ate dinner together. My mother worked full time , so did my father. Some dinners were early, some were really late - either way, all 6 of us were at that table together. Even if it was McDonald’s mom grabbed on the way home. Once my dad died, it stopped. He was the glue.
ETA: it was different then. Us kids didn’t have activities. Our active was going out to play with our friends on the block and coming home to our moms calling our names from the window to come and eat.
I miss those days of playing outside and having old fashioned fun. Life was so much simpler back in the day when we were little. Kids seemed happier and less stressed than kids are nowadays. Now it's so much more common to over schedule kids and put them in a million activities.
I hate the idea of running all over town day in and day out like a chicken without a head. I also think it's good for kids to have downtime to learn how to "just be". I've made it a point to limit how many things my kids can participate in at one time, especially while they are small. They'll have plenty of time to be busy as they get older so for now I'm enjoying our open calendar.
To each his own of course, I'm not knocking how anyone does things. For myself though I just detest a packed calendar regardless of what is scheduled.
Compared to most of the families where we live my kids actually are not in many activities. My son plays one sport at a time on the middle school schedule and then golfs with his friends when he has free time. My daughter does competitive gymnastics so that is time consuming but it's her only activity and my other daughter only does Ninja and not all year.
But just as an FYI I live in a neighborhood where kids are outside playing all the time. They ring one another's doorbell and ask their friends to come out and play. They ride bikes all over the neighborhood and walk into town sometimes. Those things are not gone, it just all depends on where you choose to live. Like you said about dinner, it's all about priorities. I could choose to live in an area with more land and a bigger house, but I would rather live where my kids have friends up and down the street and automatic playdates without the need for the moms to even get involved.
We're getting off topic here but...............
I see what you're saying and I lived in a similar neighborhood on the island and it was great, it certainly had its advantages. I could have stayed and bought a bigger house with more land but over time I just got tired of living on an island that was SO overpopulated. I was sick of congested roads and spending our weekends running and fighting crowds no matter where we went. Nothing felt enjoyable anymore, everywhere we went there was a mob scene. To even just get a pumpkin out east you're stuck sitting in 4 hrs of traffic for goodness sake. We really wanted a simpler, quieter life and different experiences for the us and kids. So we moved.
It's more rural where we are now but it's blissfully quiet and beautiful. Instead of staring at traffic and strip malls we stare at mountains, woods and wildlife. We are minutes from amazing hiking, rivers, camping, fishing, skiing and more outdoor activities than we thought available. We have cute Main Streets and lots of community activities. It feels a lot like old time America. The only downside is my DH's commute increased slightly but it was worth it to us to live in this area. Now we spend our weekends and free time taking scenic (traffic free) drives, hitting up farms, going hiking, exploring nature and for us it's been a much better way of life. Annnnnd............we still live in a lovely neighborhood with kids to play with. 
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Posted 6/25/21 9:09 AM  |
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LuckyStar
LIF Adult
Member since 7/14 7272 total posts
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How often do you eat dinner as a family.
I can’t keep quoting but re Hofstra’s response, you’re going to find more people eating dinner together in a place like your neighborhood because the likelihood of having a dual income family in this environment is slim. Busy families need amenities and the scenery is secondary. Families racing against the clock constantly don’t want to drive through the mountains to get to target.
The quality of life question in this scenario doesn’t hinge upon the town itself, but the circumstances of the people who live there. Of course not having any responsibilities would make for an easier way of life. That’s true of anywhere.
I also think equating eating dinner together as a marker for family cohesion is absurd and irrelevant, especially in 2021.
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| Posted 6/25/21 10:01 AM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by LuckyStar
I can’t keep quoting but re Hofstra’s response, you’re going to find more people eating dinner together in a place like your neighborhood because the likelihood of having a dual income family in this environment is slim. Busy families need amenities and the scenery is secondary. Families racing against the clock constantly don’t want to drive through the mountains to get to target.
The quality of life question in this scenario doesn’t hinge upon the town itself, but the circumstances of the people who live there. Of course not having any responsibilities would make for an easier way of life. That’s true of anywhere.
I also think equating eating dinner together as a marker for family cohesion is absurd and irrelevant, especially in 2021.
Actually, you're incorrect regarding my neighborhood. MANY still commute all the way into Manhattan and while there are some single income families there are plenty of two income earner households as well. It's rather silly to assume that because people are more spread out they are any less busy. Long Islanders tend to have a very jaded view of the rest of the world, many cannot seem to comprehend a lifestyle that is remotely different from the bumper to bumper traffic, endless shopping and race against the clock lifestyle that is living in NY. Plenty of people have left the island and figured out how to do things better.
As for dinner, even in 2021 many families still think it's an important meal to share. If someone doesn't, that's fine too.
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| Posted 6/25/21 10:13 AM |
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LuckyStar
LIF Adult
Member since 7/14 7272 total posts
Name:
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by LuckyStar
I can’t keep quoting but re Hofstra’s response, you’re going to find more people eating dinner together in a place like your neighborhood because the likelihood of having a dual income family in this environment is slim. Busy families need amenities and the scenery is secondary. Families racing against the clock constantly don’t want to drive through the mountains to get to target.
The quality of life question in this scenario doesn’t hinge upon the town itself, but the circumstances of the people who live there. Of course not having any responsibilities would make for an easier way of life. That’s true of anywhere.
I also think equating eating dinner together as a marker for family cohesion is absurd and irrelevant, especially in 2021.
Actually, you're incorrect regarding my neighborhood. MANY still commute all the way into Manhattan and while there are some single income families there are plenty of two income earner households as well. It's rather silly to assume that because people are more spread out they are any less busy. Long Islanders tend to have a very jaded view of the rest of the world, many cannot seem to comprehend a lifestyle that is remotely different from the bumper to bumper traffic, endless shopping and race against the clock lifestyle that is living in NY. Plenty of people have left the island and figured out how to do things better.
As for dinner, even in 2021 many families still think it's an important meal to share. If someone doesn't, that's fine too.
I don’t live on LI. That’s why I’m bringing it up. It is extremely difficult to have 2 parents working demanding jobs and not have the convenience of shopping, doctors offices, etc easily accessible. It takes me twice as long to do things now than it did on LI. This is a sentiment shared by many of the working moms who live in my area. We can’t run an errand on Wednesday at noon. We can run an errand at 7 when everything is closed or on the weekend when everything is mobbed.
Your life is easier because you don’t work. If you dropped a woman working 10 hours a day into a small town with few conveniences, her life would become harder, not easier. I say that because I am one of those women.
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| Posted 6/25/21 10:39 AM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by LuckyStar
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by LuckyStar
I can’t keep quoting but re Hofstra’s response, you’re going to find more people eating dinner together in a place like your neighborhood because the likelihood of having a dual income family in this environment is slim. Busy families need amenities and the scenery is secondary. Families racing against the clock constantly don’t want to drive through the mountains to get to target.
The quality of life question in this scenario doesn’t hinge upon the town itself, but the circumstances of the people who live there. Of course not having any responsibilities would make for an easier way of life. That’s true of anywhere.
I also think equating eating dinner together as a marker for family cohesion is absurd and irrelevant, especially in 2021.
Actually, you're incorrect regarding my neighborhood. MANY still commute all the way into Manhattan and while there are some single income families there are plenty of two income earner households as well. It's rather silly to assume that because people are more spread out they are any less busy. Long Islanders tend to have a very jaded view of the rest of the world, many cannot seem to comprehend a lifestyle that is remotely different from the bumper to bumper traffic, endless shopping and race against the clock lifestyle that is living in NY. Plenty of people have left the island and figured out how to do things better.
As for dinner, even in 2021 many families still think it's an important meal to share. If someone doesn't, that's fine too.
I don’t live on LI. That’s why I’m bringing it up. It is extremely difficult to have 2 parents working demanding jobs and not have the convenience of shopping, doctors offices, etc easily accessible. It takes me twice as long to do things now than it did on LI. This is a sentiment shared by many of the working moms who live in my area. We can’t run an errand on Wednesday at noon. We can run an errand at 7 when everything is closed or on the weekend when everything is mobbed.
Your life is easier because you don’t work. If you dropped a woman working 10 hours a day into a small town with few conveniences, her life would become harder, not easier. I say that because I am one of those women.
I'm really not sure how a thread about DINNER is turning into some diatribe about how I live my life. But anyway........yes, I don't work. However, I have friends here that do and somehow they manage despite living more rural. Do you things take a little more time? Sure. But you also plan/live your life differently and don't stop at the store all the time like you do on LI. Even I've changed how I do things. There are two income families ALL across this nation that are somehow managing even while living in conditions that are nothing like LI. I have friends that did the hustle on LI and moved away to smaller towns and would argue your point that it's not easier for them out of NY.
What is even the argument here really? Are we trying to argue that there is no possible way a family with two working parents could ever possibly have a better, easier or even busy life off of LI because if so, that's just bizarre and way off base. I really have no idea where this discussion is going so maybe we should just get back to discussing dinner.
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| Posted 6/25/21 10:59 AM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9508 total posts
Name:
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by Hofstra26
What is even the argument here really? Are we trying to argue that there is no possible way a family with two working parents could ever possibly have a better, easier or even busy life off of LI because if so, that's just bizarre and way off base. I really have no idea where this discussion is going so maybe we should just get back to discussing dinner.
I agree, that is a ludicrous argument. But I also find it odd when people lump long island into one big place that everyone is living the same lifestyle. Long Island is a very large place, made up of many different and diversified communities. And as you said you adjust your lifestyle to your surroundings. For example, I am very rarely bothered by traffic on Long Island because I very rarely leave my town to run errands. I have everything right here and I don't need to. I can walk to great shopping, restaurants etc. I do find that Long Island becomes much more manageable the more money that you have. I think a lot of people are looking for a certain lifestyle and they just simply can not afford to live it here.
Sorry that I got off topic. I forgot that the post police is monitoring these threads to make sure we don't veer off course!
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| Posted 6/25/21 11:08 AM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
What is even the argument here really? Are we trying to argue that there is no possible way a family with two working parents could ever possibly have a better, easier or even busy life off of LI because if so, that's just bizarre and way off base. I really have no idea where this discussion is going so maybe we should just get back to discussing dinner.
I agree, that is a ludicrous argument. But I also find it odd when people lump long island into one big place that everyone is living the same lifestyle. Long Island is a very large place, made up of many different and diversified communities. And as you said you adjust your lifestyle to your surroundings. For example, I am very rarely bothered by traffic on Long Island because I very rarely leave my town to run errands. I have everything right here and I don't need to. I can walk to great shopping, restaurants etc. I do find that Long Island becomes much more manageable the more money that you have. I think a lot of people are looking for a certain lifestyle and they just simply can not afford to live it here.
Sorry that I got off topic. I forgot that the post police is monitoring these threads to make sure we don't veer off course!
I agree, LI absolutely has different ways of life community to community. And naturally, money makes any lifestyle in any place much easier.
For us, moving wasn't about money We were just looking for a lifestyle that LI really couldn't provide. We were also so tired of being locked by the city. Getting off the island is such a nightmare 99% of the time that I found myself not bothering to leave to do things just to avoid the headache. I've discovered things about myself and activities that I love here that I know I never would have had I stayed.
Again, as with anything in life it all comes back to what brings you joy and what's important to you in life. Everyone has different priorities.
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| Posted 6/25/21 11:31 AM |
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ali120206
2 Boys
Member since 7/06 17789 total posts
Name:
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
We don't often.
When DH is home, he and I will eat together most nights unless a kid has something. The kids usually eat separate from us as they are picky and never hungry at the same time.
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| Posted 6/25/21 11:38 AM |
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Jennifer
Happy
Member since 5/05 4230 total posts
Name:
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Even though it is just my husband and I. We have dinner together just about every night. We do not have children.
There are times we sometimes eat super late if he is working and we will eat together 9 or 10 at night.
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| Posted 6/25/21 11:47 AM |
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seaside
LIF Adult
Member since 6/08 3101 total posts
Name:
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
We always try. We succeed a few nights a week. I also think that grabbing something en route to a fun and rewarding activity for the kids is worthwhile as well. We are together.
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| Posted 6/25/21 11:52 AM |
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LuckyStar
LIF Adult
Member since 7/14 7272 total posts
Name:
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
What is even the argument here really? Are we trying to argue that there is no possible way a family with two working parents could ever possibly have a better, easier or even busy life off of LI because if so, that's just bizarre and way off base. I really have no idea where this discussion is going so maybe we should just get back to discussing dinner.
I agree, that is a ludicrous argument. But I also find it odd when people lump long island into one big place that everyone is living the same lifestyle. Long Island is a very large place, made up of many different and diversified communities. And as you said you adjust your lifestyle to your surroundings. For example, I am very rarely bothered by traffic on Long Island because I very rarely leave my town to run errands. I have everything right here and I don't need to. I can walk to great shopping, restaurants etc. I do find that Long Island becomes much more manageable the more money that you have. I think a lot of people are looking for a certain lifestyle and they just simply can not afford to live it here.
Sorry that I got off topic. I forgot that the post police is monitoring these threads to make sure we don't veer off course!
I am always surprised about the argument that LI is so expensive. Perhaps in relation to the middle of the country, but it is, on average (and yes, I understand it’s huge and there are towns all across the socioeconomic spectrum), more affordable than other parts of the NY metro area. Many parts of northern NJ and Westchester and Fairfield counties have higher home values and tax rates than LI. The only exception I can really think of would be parts of the Hamptons, but those homes generally aren’t primary residences.
But, I digress. And I got even further off topic so the post police will come after me now. It’s probably time I pack it in, anyway, having turned in my LI card.
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| Posted 6/25/21 12:05 PM |
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Deeluvsvinny
DONE
Member since 10/08 4952 total posts
Name:
Whatever
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How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Every single night (unless DH and I got out for a date night- which is rare LOL)
Its the one thing both my family & Dh's did growing up and it's important to us. We only have 1 child though, so if there's an activity, we just plan dinner around that for that night. Even if we aren't eating the same thing, we sit down and eat our meal and talk.
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| Posted 6/25/21 12:15 PM |
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Sash
Peace
Member since 6/08 10312 total posts
Name:
fka LIW Smara
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by NervousNell
Only on Saturdays when we go out to dinner (if DD comes with us...lately she's been spending a lot of Saturday nights at friend's houses. ).
During the week DH and I eat around 730 or 8 pm and that's too late for DD. Plus she rarely eats what we do...so we'll make her something early and DH and I will eat together while watching TV
We're the same. Have you ever seen that commercial about kids more likely to be addicted to drugs when the family doesn't sit together for dinner?
I remember when I first saw the commercial, I turned to my DH and said we are f#cked, we better start saving for rehab and therapy. 
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| Posted 6/25/21 1:14 PM |
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Sash
Peace
Member since 6/08 10312 total posts
Name:
fka LIW Smara
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by LuckyStar
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
What is even the argument here really? Are we trying to argue that there is no possible way a family with two working parents could ever possibly have a better, easier or even busy life off of LI because if so, that's just bizarre and way off base. I really have no idea where this discussion is going so maybe we should just get back to discussing dinner.
I agree, that is a ludicrous argument. But I also find it odd when people lump long island into one big place that everyone is living the same lifestyle. Long Island is a very large place, made up of many different and diversified communities. And as you said you adjust your lifestyle to your surroundings. For example, I am very rarely bothered by traffic on Long Island because I very rarely leave my town to run errands. I have everything right here and I don't need to. I can walk to great shopping, restaurants etc. I do find that Long Island becomes much more manageable the more money that you have. I think a lot of people are looking for a certain lifestyle and they just simply can not afford to live it here.
Sorry that I got off topic. I forgot that the post police is monitoring these threads to make sure we don't veer off course!
I am always surprised about the argument that LI is so expensive. Perhaps in relation to the middle of the country, but it is, on average (and yes, I understand it’s huge and there are towns all across the socioeconomic spectrum), more affordable than other parts of the NY metro area. Many parts of northern NJ and Westchester and Fairfield counties have higher home values and tax rates than LI. The only exception I can really think of would be parts of the Hamptons, but those homes generally aren’t primary residences.
But, I digress. And I got even further off topic so the post police will come after me now. It’s probably time I pack it in, anyway, having turned in my LI card.
Omg you are so right. LOL. On a past real estate thread people were sayin how Northern NJ was a dump when you drive through it, meanwhile, it's only homes in the millions of millions where celebrities and athletes live, that's all. The other places you mention too are so nice and $$$.
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| Posted 6/25/21 1:20 PM |
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
There is nothing to explain. When something is a priority, dinner or otherwise, you figure out how to make it work. I'm not sure what's so hard to understand. Stop making assumptions about me or anyone else as you literally have NO idea what you're talking about nor do you know anything about my life. Just accept the fact that different families have different priorities and different ways of doing things. Why do you always need everyone to explain everything to you? My comment was pretty self explanatory.
I think that Windy is just trying to point out that, in order to put that food on the dinner table, some times one spouse or the other needs to be at work while the rest of the family is eating dinner. Surely feeding your family is more important than all of you eating that food together. I think we can all agree that would be the priority when you can't just get another job or change careers.
Thank you. It’s not always easy to plan dinners around schedules and honestly while it is nice to eat together, it is not the end all be all with most families.
When you are used to working a “normal” time job, you don’t really understand how different life is and many just can’t make eating together a priority.
Sounds like many live in a bubble and the ones they do know who have come across this just move elsewhere and others just have their priorities messed up.
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| Posted 6/25/21 1:32 PM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by windyweather21
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
There is nothing to explain. When something is a priority, dinner or otherwise, you figure out how to make it work. I'm not sure what's so hard to understand. Stop making assumptions about me or anyone else as you literally have NO idea what you're talking about nor do you know anything about my life. Just accept the fact that different families have different priorities and different ways of doing things. Why do you always need everyone to explain everything to you? My comment was pretty self explanatory.
I think that Windy is just trying to point out that, in order to put that food on the dinner table, some times one spouse or the other needs to be at work while the rest of the family is eating dinner. Surely feeding your family is more important than all of you eating that food together. I think we can all agree that would be the priority when you can't just get another job or change careers.
Thank you. It’s not always easy to plan dinners around schedules and honestly while it is nice to eat together, it is not the end all be all with most families.
When you are used to working a “normal” time job, you don’t really understand how different life is and many just can’t make eating together a priority.
Sounds like many live in a bubble and the ones they do know who have come across this just move elsewhere and others just have their priorities messed up.
NOBODY said dinner is the "end all and be all". NOBODY said that some people don't have crazy schedules. NOBODY said they are better than anyone else for making dinner a priority. NOBODY said there is one way to do things. NOBODY said you HAVE to have dinner together EVERY night. NOBODY is telling anyone to move or get another job just so they can eat together.
Your comments about "people living in a bubble and people having their priorities out of whack" simply because they value a family dinner is literally one of the dumbest things I've ever read.
How about just accepting the fact that every family does things differently. MANY on here have replied that they still do a family dinner, WHY do you and a few others feel the need to keep trying to point out how that is not possible, not feasible, not something anyone does in the 21st century and not important when people are LITERALLY telling you the EXACT opposite.
Only on LIF could a simple thread about who eats dinner as a family get people twisted up in a knot. 
Message edited 6/25/2021 1:47:31 PM.
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| Posted 6/25/21 1:46 PM |
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by windyweather21
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
There is nothing to explain. When something is a priority, dinner or otherwise, you figure out how to make it work. I'm not sure what's so hard to understand. Stop making assumptions about me or anyone else as you literally have NO idea what you're talking about nor do you know anything about my life. Just accept the fact that different families have different priorities and different ways of doing things. Why do you always need everyone to explain everything to you? My comment was pretty self explanatory.
I think that Windy is just trying to point out that, in order to put that food on the dinner table, some times one spouse or the other needs to be at work while the rest of the family is eating dinner. Surely feeding your family is more important than all of you eating that food together. I think we can all agree that would be the priority when you can't just get another job or change careers.
Thank you. It’s not always easy to plan dinners around schedules and honestly while it is nice to eat together, it is not the end all be all with most families.
When you are used to working a “normal” time job, you don’t really understand how different life is and many just can’t make eating together a priority.
Sounds like many live in a bubble and the ones they do know who have come across this just move elsewhere and others just have their priorities messed up.
NOBODY said dinner is the "end all and be all". NOBODY said that some people don't have crazy schedules. NOBODY said they are better than anyone else for making dinner a priority. NOBODY said there is one way to do things. NOBODY said you HAVE to have dinner together EVERY night. NOBODY is telling anyone to move or get another job just so they can eat together.
Your comments about "people living in a bubble and people having their priorities out of whack" simply because they value a family dinner is literally one of the dumbest things I've ever read.
How about just accepting the fact that every family does things differently. MANY on here have replied that they still do a family dinner, WHY do you and a few others feel the need to keep trying to point out how that is not possible, not feasible, not something anyone does in the 21st century and not important when people are LITERALLY telling you the EXACT opposite.
Only on LIF could a simple thread about who eats dinner as a family get people twisted up in a knot.
“It depends on what you value”
“There is nothing to explain. When something is a priority, dinner or otherwise, you figure out how to make it work.”
Once again you make others try to feel like if they don’t have dinner together they don’t value it or make it a priority because you can figure it out better then they can.
Don’t you see how you come across here?
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| Posted 6/25/21 1:54 PM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by windyweather21
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by windyweather21
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
There is nothing to explain. When something is a priority, dinner or otherwise, you figure out how to make it work. I'm not sure what's so hard to understand. Stop making assumptions about me or anyone else as you literally have NO idea what you're talking about nor do you know anything about my life. Just accept the fact that different families have different priorities and different ways of doing things. Why do you always need everyone to explain everything to you? My comment was pretty self explanatory.
I think that Windy is just trying to point out that, in order to put that food on the dinner table, some times one spouse or the other needs to be at work while the rest of the family is eating dinner. Surely feeding your family is more important than all of you eating that food together. I think we can all agree that would be the priority when you can't just get another job or change careers.
Thank you. It’s not always easy to plan dinners around schedules and honestly while it is nice to eat together, it is not the end all be all with most families.
When you are used to working a “normal” time job, you don’t really understand how different life is and many just can’t make eating together a priority.
Sounds like many live in a bubble and the ones they do know who have come across this just move elsewhere and others just have their priorities messed up.
NOBODY said dinner is the "end all and be all". NOBODY said that some people don't have crazy schedules. NOBODY said they are better than anyone else for making dinner a priority. NOBODY said there is one way to do things. NOBODY said you HAVE to have dinner together EVERY night. NOBODY is telling anyone to move or get another job just so they can eat together.
Your comments about "people living in a bubble and people having their priorities out of whack" simply because they value a family dinner is literally one of the dumbest things I've ever read.
How about just accepting the fact that every family does things differently. MANY on here have replied that they still do a family dinner, WHY do you and a few others feel the need to keep trying to point out how that is not possible, not feasible, not something anyone does in the 21st century and not important when people are LITERALLY telling you the EXACT opposite.
Only on LIF could a simple thread about who eats dinner as a family get people twisted up in a knot.
“It depends on what you value”
“There is nothing to explain. When something is a priority, dinner or otherwise, you figure out how to make it work.”
Once again you make others try to feel like if they don’t have dinner together they don’t value it or make it a priority because you can figure it out better then they can.
Don’t you see how you come across here?
You love sh!t stirring, don't you? First, you're taking my words completely out of context. NOBODY, not me or anyone else, said dinner MUST be something EVERYONE should value and make time for. Literally NOBODY said that. NOT once.
Basic life lesson for you since this seems to be flying over your head.
If something is of importance to you, if you value something, if something has meaning for you...................you make time in your life for it. Period. It doesn't matter what that "something" is. If your friends are important to you, you make time for them. If you have a hobby that is important to you, you make time for it. If dinner together is important to you, you make time for it. If reading is important to you, you make time for it. If seeing the world is important to you, you make time for it. And on and on and on.
If something is of NO value to you and doesn't really matter to you in any way than OBVIOUSLY you don't make the time for that thing. NOBODY said there is anything wrong with that. EVERYONE on here gets that a family dinner might not matter to all and EVERYONE gets that some might not even have the time for it in the first place. That's fine, every family is different. BUT if a family dinner was important to someone than they would find a way to work around their schedules or activities or whatever to make it a priority which is the point everyone who does family dinner has made.
It's almost as if you don't understand how life works. Or maybe it's just that you can't help but to argue literally EVERY SINGLE THING anyone on here EVER says. You really seem to care an awful lot about how a bunch of strangers do dinner. Why? 
Message edited 6/25/2021 2:09:41 PM.
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| Posted 6/25/21 2:06 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54917 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by Sash
Posted by NervousNell
Only on Saturdays when we go out to dinner (if DD comes with us...lately she's been spending a lot of Saturday nights at friend's houses. ).
During the week DH and I eat around 730 or 8 pm and that's too late for DD. Plus she rarely eats what we do...so we'll make her something early and DH and I will eat together while watching TV
We're the same. Have you ever seen that commercial about kids more likely to be addicted to drugs when the family doesn't sit together for dinner?
I remember when I first saw the commercial, I turned to my DH and said we are f#cked, we better start saving for rehab and therapy.
Man if that were true, my DD would be a heroin addict already at 11!
LOL
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| Posted 6/25/21 2:10 PM |
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Sash
Peace
Member since 6/08 10312 total posts
Name:
fka LIW Smara
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by NervousNell
Posted by Sash
Posted by NervousNell
Only on Saturdays when we go out to dinner (if DD comes with us...lately she's been spending a lot of Saturday nights at friend's houses. ).
During the week DH and I eat around 730 or 8 pm and that's too late for DD. Plus she rarely eats what we do...so we'll make her something early and DH and I will eat together while watching TV
We're the same. Have you ever seen that commercial about kids more likely to be addicted to drugs when the family doesn't sit together for dinner?
I remember when I first saw the commercial, I turned to my DH and said we are f#cked, we better start saving for rehab and therapy.
Man if that were true, my DD would be a heroin addict already at 11!
LOL
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| Posted 6/25/21 2:21 PM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9508 total posts
Name:
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by LuckyStar
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
What is even the argument here really? Are we trying to argue that there is no possible way a family with two working parents could ever possibly have a better, easier or even busy life off of LI because if so, that's just bizarre and way off base. I really have no idea where this discussion is going so maybe we should just get back to discussing dinner.
I agree, that is a ludicrous argument. But I also find it odd when people lump long island into one big place that everyone is living the same lifestyle. Long Island is a very large place, made up of many different and diversified communities. And as you said you adjust your lifestyle to your surroundings. For example, I am very rarely bothered by traffic on Long Island because I very rarely leave my town to run errands. I have everything right here and I don't need to. I can walk to great shopping, restaurants etc. I do find that Long Island becomes much more manageable the more money that you have. I think a lot of people are looking for a certain lifestyle and they just simply can not afford to live it here.
Sorry that I got off topic. I forgot that the post police is monitoring these threads to make sure we don't veer off course!
I am always surprised about the argument that LI is so expensive. Perhaps in relation to the middle of the country, but it is, on average (and yes, I understand it’s huge and there are towns all across the socioeconomic spectrum), more affordable than other parts of the NY metro area. Many parts of northern NJ and Westchester and Fairfield counties have higher home values and tax rates than LI. The only exception I can really think of would be parts of the Hamptons, but those homes generally aren’t primary residences.
But, I digress. And I got even further off topic so the post police will come after me now. It’s probably time I pack it in, anyway, having turned in my LI card.
I actually think the COL is directly related to your proximity to the city whether you go north south east or west.
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| Posted 6/25/21 2:37 PM |
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Naturalmama
Love my boys!!
Member since 1/12 3548 total posts
Name:
Christine
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How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Wow, even how often you eat dinner with your children can turn a thread into drama these days.
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| Posted 6/25/21 3:27 PM |
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LuckyStar
LIF Adult
Member since 7/14 7272 total posts
Name:
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by windyweather21
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by windyweather21
Posted by lululu
Posted by Hofstra26
There is nothing to explain. When something is a priority, dinner or otherwise, you figure out how to make it work. I'm not sure what's so hard to understand. Stop making assumptions about me or anyone else as you literally have NO idea what you're talking about nor do you know anything about my life. Just accept the fact that different families have different priorities and different ways of doing things. Why do you always need everyone to explain everything to you? My comment was pretty self explanatory.
I think that Windy is just trying to point out that, in order to put that food on the dinner table, some times one spouse or the other needs to be at work while the rest of the family is eating dinner. Surely feeding your family is more important than all of you eating that food together. I think we can all agree that would be the priority when you can't just get another job or change careers.
Thank you. It’s not always easy to plan dinners around schedules and honestly while it is nice to eat together, it is not the end all be all with most families.
When you are used to working a “normal” time job, you don’t really understand how different life is and many just can’t make eating together a priority.
Sounds like many live in a bubble and the ones they do know who have come across this just move elsewhere and others just have their priorities messed up.
NOBODY said dinner is the "end all and be all". NOBODY said that some people don't have crazy schedules. NOBODY said they are better than anyone else for making dinner a priority. NOBODY said there is one way to do things. NOBODY said you HAVE to have dinner together EVERY night. NOBODY is telling anyone to move or get another job just so they can eat together.
Your comments about "people living in a bubble and people having their priorities out of whack" simply because they value a family dinner is literally one of the dumbest things I've ever read.
How about just accepting the fact that every family does things differently. MANY on here have replied that they still do a family dinner, WHY do you and a few others feel the need to keep trying to point out how that is not possible, not feasible, not something anyone does in the 21st century and not important when people are LITERALLY telling you the EXACT opposite.
Only on LIF could a simple thread about who eats dinner as a family get people twisted up in a knot.
“It depends on what you value”
“There is nothing to explain. When something is a priority, dinner or otherwise, you figure out how to make it work.”
Once again you make others try to feel like if they don’t have dinner together they don’t value it or make it a priority because you can figure it out better then they can.
Don’t you see how you come across here?
That’s precisely how it came off and she doesn’t see it.
I’m embarrassed for myself that I even added fuel to the fire on an internet message board tiff. But there is this constant air of superiority and lack of self awareness that I just don’t understand.
But whatever. White flag. If someone wants to feel superior to me, go right ahead. The fact that my family eats dinner together isn’t on my list of accomplishments.
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| Posted 6/25/21 3:28 PM |
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Sash
Peace
Member since 6/08 10312 total posts
Name:
fka LIW Smara
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by busymomonli
Every night. But I would say maybe 2 out of 7 nights, one of my kids is missing because of plans or obligations. My kids are older, 21 and 18. My daughter always says that of all her friends, we are the only family that eats together.
Wait a minute 5 out of the 7 nights your two adult kids sit with you for dinner. That’s so impressive. I can’t even get my 23 year old SS to come visit me 2 days out of a month. LOL.
Message edited 6/25/2021 5:54:08 PM.
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| Posted 6/25/21 5:47 PM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9508 total posts
Name:
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Re: How often do you eat dinner as a family.
Posted by Naturalmama
Wow, even how often you eat dinner with your children can turn a thread into drama these days.
The reasons things like this turn into drama is because people say things in such condescending tones and it annoys the shit out of people.
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| Posted 6/25/21 8:18 PM |
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