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A relationship question for moms with babies...
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CkGm
They get so big, so fast :(
Member since 5/05 13848 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: A relationship question for moms with babies...
I definately feel this way. I still love my DH, if not more since he is such a great dad but my love for DD is so overwhelming right now. I am sure it will balance out eventually.
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Posted 6/6/07 12:00 AM  |
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Bxgell2
Perfection
Member since 5/05 16438 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: A relationship question for moms with babies...
That's completely a natural part of the whole process, more so in the beginning when your child is so completely dependent on you. But, like others said, I think it is just so, so, so, so essential to focus on your relationship with DH once those tough, early months pass. I've seen it happen so many times, with so many friends - they become completely engrossed in their baby, that they lose touch with their DH, and friends, and I really don't think that's healthy either for mom, the relationship, OR baby.
I really believe that one of the most beautiful and truly meaningful gifts that you can give to your child, right from the start, is an example of what a strong, healthy, bonded marriage should be. They've done so many studies on this on how the parent's relationshp affects the children, even at the youngest of ages. So, while sometimes it might mean that I don't give quite as much attention to Alex, I think she gains so much from seeing DH and I engrossed in conversation, hugging, kissing, or just spending quality time together. And like other said, that kind of strength takes HARD work after you've had a child - but it is just so important that both parents keep that at the forefront of their mind, and really make an effort.
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| Posted 6/6/07 7:49 AM |
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ddunne2
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 4189 total posts
Name:
Doreen
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Re: A relationship question for moms with babies...
Posted by Bxgell2
That's completely a natural part of the whole process, more so in the beginning when your child is so completely dependent on you. But, like others said, I think it is just so, so, so, so essential to focus on your relationship with DH once those tough, early months pass. I've seen it happen so many times, with so many friends - they become completely engrossed in their baby, that they lose touch with their DH, and friends, and I really don't think that's healthy either for mom, the relationship, OR baby.
I really believe that one of the most beautiful and truly meaningful gifts that you can give to your child, right from the start, is an example of what a strong, healthy, bonded marriage should be. They've done so many studies on this on how the parent's relationshp affects the children, even at the youngest of ages. So, while sometimes it might mean that I don't give quite as much attention to Alex, I think she gains so much from seeing DH and I engrossed in conversation, hugging, kissing, or just spending quality time together. And like other said, that kind of strength takes HARD work after you've had a child - but it is just so important that both parents keep that at the forefront of their mind, and really make an effort.
Very well said. THat reminded me of my SIL who takes that rationale to the extreme and she and her husband go out all the time to the point that their one son almost seems like baggage to them and he is aware that they would rather spend time with each other and their friends than family time. His grandparenst have raised him just as much as his parents have. Sad.
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| Posted 6/6/07 7:54 AM |
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GenLCSW
Baby # 3 is here!!!
Member since 7/05 21138 total posts
Name:
Genna
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Re: A relationship question for moms with babies...
I think that I have the same relationship and love for DH but I have a different kind of love and relationship with Jacob
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| Posted 6/6/07 8:34 AM |
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JennyGirl
LIF Adolescent
Member since 4/06 606 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: A relationship question for moms with babies...
Date nights. Something to look forward to with DH. A reason to put on a sexy dress and hold hands and sip wine. You deserve it. 
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| Posted 6/6/07 9:47 AM |
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BabyAvocado
Happy New Year
Member since 5/05 17334 total posts
Name:
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Re: A relationship question for moms with babies...
No, not really. I know what you mean, I know what you are saying, but I've made a conscious effort to not let this happen. It's not easy... and it actually gets harder to do as the baby gets older.
Posted by cgdg61606
From what everyone says though as the baby grows some aspects of that pre baby relationship start to come back. I hope so!
Hmm...no, not so much. At least not for me. It gets harder to get back to pre-baby relationship as the baby gets older. You see, the novelty of a new baby never "wears off" like a new toy or a new relationship because a baby is constantly growing and changing and surprising you everyday, and making you fall more and MORE in love with them everyday - and actually begins to demand MORE of your attention (albeit in different ways) as the baby grows.
You can't put your marriage on the back burner for several months and expect to come back to it and find it exactly the way you left it. That's another reason why you can't rely on this "it's only temporary" thing. You have to continue to nurture your marriage during this time.
And I know it's hard, but I actually found that to be a much easier thing to do when I had an infant than now that I have a demanding toddler.
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| Posted 6/6/07 10:46 AM |
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| Pages: 1 [2] |
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